:::Luke:::
Opia, an unique english term infer to the ambigous intensity when looking into someone’s eyes, which can feel both invasive and vulnerable, thus it can’t help but remind me of the word ‘opium’.
the term descirbes perfectly a condition that I suffer from, constantly in a day to day communication, however by being half otaku, things arent’t that awkward for me on screen, I could stare at them for hours and I still have my sanity intact. It’s not like that I’m boasting about my stamina though. But when you really think about it, having two alternate personalities is quite bizarre. changing from one person to another, really give you an identity crisis, however I pass that long ago, the only thing I ever get out of the concept of alter ego is what I get out of people when I become William, my so called host alter. The me right now, which I assume to be my true self I guess, is Luke, an otaku, a helpless one like any other of the same kind. Nevertheless I’m not like all people, William makes life more convenient for me.
For the alter, Luke, regarding attention span there isn’t anything to consider really, Akihabara is the only thing can keep my eyes intact in one direction, a man sure will wither without his obsession. Since Akhihabara is no more than 10 minutes walk from here, I decided to leave the house-a shelter scattered in garbages I couldn’t care less about it. Walking out without combing my hair, my brushed teeth, and saggy, oversize clothes. Along the way, I made a stop, checking out some figurines and maybe arcade, visiting Mr. Yaba once in a while too. He’s a middle age man with resemblance to a country singer, he is an old school man himself anyway. Wearing his saggy jeans and shirt, greeting me with widen lips, inches from his ears. Alot of people get the creeps from him but how could I avoid a man who’ll give me free magazines.
It was for a few minutes I enjoy discussing his grand daughters with him-the only thing he’d find content in talking, a familiar figure then start walking by the store entrance, I can see reflections of light outside the glass door. ‘So familiar’, I think, making my way out the door and take a peak. My feet stumbles upon the appeal of lover boy, casually in his jeans, checking out some manga. Immediately I withheld my body, almost trip over Mr.Yaba also taking a peak, secretly behind my back.
“You know that boy?” he asks
“Um...n-no, he just look familiar to my cousin, that’s all.”
Despite of my stuttering, the guy shrugs it off, taking a broom and start sweeping. I divert my eyes to lover boy, his posture changes, he straightened his back and seems like he decides to go in. I dash straight to the book shelves, trying to tip toe as much as I can, grabbing some random book and start skimming. I can hear his foot steps, his presence, my body froze, still, my thoughts flashes through the corner of my eyes and for a moment I think I stop breathing.
........
....”still”, I whisper.....
........
“H-hello there-“
I startle, almost fall on my back, he seems confused and nervous as well. When I turn around and realize that all my efforts went to waste, lover boy was standing right there, gripping a literature book, M-marquis de what? It was upside down. My eyes move up from his waist, standing before an unsure man, shifting his eyes to avoid my awkward gaze. I stutter,
“H-hello, f-fancy to see you h-here...”
Fancy to see you here?! Am I some kind of dumb jerk, well maybe I am but that’s not the point!
Slowly he stares back at me, still a little hesitant, replies,
“M-me too.”
After that we find ourselves in awkward silence, trying to suprress the uncomfortable nonsense.
“Um...you cook?” he bravely speaks up
“Huh?....”
I look down and there I was, holding a famous cooking magazine, seems to be, the woman on the coverage is everywhere these days.
“I don’t cook.” *facepalm
“I see...”
“But I’m learning!”
Me trying to cope up with embarassing small talks. I don’t know how to cook, the things I ever eat is pizza and instant noodles. I don’t even know how break and egg for god’s sake. But he sure looks happy about it.
“You must teach me sometimes, my boyfriend adores good food.”, saying with a naive expression, and .... boyfriend, yes, for a long time there I almost forgot, how pitiful of me. Reaching at the peak of non sensical bullshit, I start to ask him about books.
“Oh, I’m an author.”
After a while, I got to know him better, 20 of age(quite young actually with the fact that I’m 32), he is a well known author, one I learn to adore, Aya-sensei.
“Why’d you choose a female name?”
I chatter as we walk along the arrays of shelves.
“I just don’t like alot of attention, they’ll figure that I’m a woman instead and won’t approach me then.”
Lover boy, once in a while, stops to check out some eroticas, he acts normally when he pulls the hard cover down, I’m not freaking out but I never thought he’d be so comfrtable with it. He usually gives of innocent quality to that of a four years old child. We move on nevertheless over the erotica section.
Half an hour past and we know pretty much about each other on aquaintance level.
“Are you hungry?” I blurt out of nowhere.
“Quite, I didn’t eat breakfast.” Heh, me too.
“So how about this nice coffee shop, they serve lunches there and you can enjoy reading your book.”
Lover boy without hesitation, complies to my interest.
“Why not?” he says,
********************
We made a stop by this vacant intersection, the blue painted doors were so obvious to the eyes, when oblivion fails to take over. The jamming light fades out the aura of a nice venture to that of a small apartment.
“Are you sure this is the right one?”
“Yes, yes.” Lover boy tumbles behind me, clumsily stands up once I fail to help him.
“It looks like a condominium for rent though.”
“People get fool by that.”
And I pushes the door, the sound of bell ringing echo throughout walls. As vacant as always, I call out his name.
“Jamie!”
*o*o*o*o* Btw guys, I wanted to draw illustrations for ‘lover boy’ but I can’t include it in the novel so I’m going to create a comic, but it’s just illustrations inside though. Thanks for checking out lover boy 😆😆😆
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