One quick glance around the room told me that I had them all eager and hooked to find out how my tragic love story would end. He was asking what it was that life had to offer to him if he were to keep on living. What would happen to us if he could hold on a little longer. Would I be willing to call the darkness that he learned to call home my home as well...and the answer to that was that I was. I was so deeply in love with him that I was willing to throw away all the things that made me happy and so much more just to save him. He knew this and that's why he decided to let go the way he did. He didn't want to bring me to his world and didn't want to make me suffer the way he did. What he didn't know was that by leaving me all alone like he did he had hurt me more then he could ever know. Cause by doing that he left me to live in the one thing that I feared the most. A future with out him by my side....and a haunting question that would never go away. "If I had figured this out sooner...could I have prevented this from ever happening? If I had left my house and ran to him on the night he sent me that text would he still even be here or would have all been for nothing in the end any way....I would never know.
"So that's how your story ends?" Skyler asked me she was a quite girl with long brown straight hair and big blue eyes. She came from an abusive house hold and was seeking help with the thoughts she had in her head. All she wanted was to find a safe place just like Alex had longed for but sadly he never got the chance to find his. I nodded and went silent letting them take it all in. "Why don't we end today's group here and come back tomorrow with a fresh start to a new day okay girls?" I looked around the room getting a slight node from all the girls except Skyler. I smiled at her and gently placed my hand on her shoulder. "You'll be okay....if anything happens text me our safety word and meet me at our safe place and I'll let you spend the as many nights at my place you need to." She nodded and hugged me tightly before she too left the circle and then it was just me. I took a big strong breath and locked up the building and got in my car. Instead of heading home I went to the grave yard to go and visit Alex. It was the first time I was seeing him since he had passed away 10 years ago. I drove to the grave yard and parked my car and locked it then made my down the path of all the fallen angles that layed in there dirt beds to sleep until I stopped at his. "It's been a long time I know...you must think I hate you for what you did...but the truth is I don't at all. I just miss you is all...so much that it hurts because I never got to tell you how much I love you...."
I sat by his grave for a bit until the feelings weld up inside of my chest and it go the point where it just hurt way to much so I had to leave. I quickly sprung to my feet and turned to leave but stopped when I thought I felt some one hug me from behind and wipe away my tear as they gently whispered in my ear. "My dear tears don't suit a pretty face like yours....where's your smile my love...I think I like that much more." I quickly turned around recognizing the voice but was face with nothing but an empty space and a broken but healing heart. I smiled one last time and walked away. "Good bye Alex." I don't know why but as I left the grave yard I could have sworn I saw him sitting on top of his grave stone smiling back at me as he waved his small hand in the air good bye to me. I couldn't help but smile once more as I drove away and a thought came to my head. 'I'm sure our paths will cross again soon maybe in another life but this good bye is not for good I promise Alex...'