December 25, 2015. Paris, France

I have been to Paris countless of times that I grew fond of this country. It has been a habit of mine to visit Paris to spend our anniversary. And right now, I was spending Christmas in this beautiful city.

Seated on the grass with my back leaning on a stone slab, I played with my necklace that has an eternity pendant on it. The pendant has an engraving on it that says ‘mon amour pour toi est éternel‘,  meaning 'my love for you is eternal'. It was a gift from Claire for our fifth year anniversary.

“I know the answer, darling… The movie line.” I took a deep breath and exhaled softly, eyes on the eternity pendant.

I stopped playing with my necklace then took out a small velvet box from my pocket. The small box felt heavy on my hand as I looked at it solemnly.

“It’s from the movie Dracula Untold. I’m not sure who you were referring to that said it but I prefer when Vlad said it on the last part of the movie,” I said with a small smile. Slowly opening the velvet box, I bitterly smiled at the lone trinket inside it.

A golden ring with a small blue diamond.

Taking out the ring, I raised it up and admired the gem. The blue diamond reminded me of Claire’s eyes. Beautiful and shining. Tears ran down my cheeks as I looked at the beautiful ring. Tears that I held back for so long.

“Claire,” I cried out her name and turned around to face the stone slab that I was leaning on.

I did not read what was engraved on it. I didn’t need to.

The letters, words, on it have been burned in my heart to the point it broke me.

The words, name and date, that made me wish it has my name on it too.

The name, far too familiar, made me curse the heavens.

A large slab, a tombstone, which has my beloved’s name engraved on it and the date, November 13, 2015.

Last November 13th, Parisian time, Paris was attacked by terrorists. Gunmen and suicide bombers raided several areas within the city and one of their targets was La Belle Equipe bar. The place where Claire was supposed to have dinner with her mom on that day.

Nineteen people died on that day.

I held the ring to my chest as I cried. Cried for the love that was supposed to be forever. I leaned my head to the tombstone, crying still, and closed my eyes. “Happy anniversary and Merry Christmas, darling.” My cries turned to wails as my heart could no longer contain the pain it held since she left me.

Opening my hand, I looked at the ring that I promised to give to my beloved on this day. Gathering all my strength that seemed to have left me the 

moment I stepped foot in Paris, I looked up to the tombstone, focused on my beloved’s name, and said…

“Will you marry me?”