I kept my bath cool. It was the only way to keep my brain focused. The way he looked at me was all my mind could obsess over. The desire in it made me feel anxious to see it again.
When I was finally ready to head out the door, seeing the clean and empty kitchen made my heart suddenly ache. My key on the letter stand made the feeling even more intense.
With a sigh, I grabbed it and stepped out.
The infirmary was a raging storm. It was insanity the minute I set foot on the tile floor. The critical ward finally lived up to it's name. My rounds kept getting interrupted by high priority draws. And they were stupidly hard. As the day wore on, gratefulness for Kagorn's attentiveness of the morning grew exponentially. There was no way I would've survived the day without it.
He practically had to catch me as I stumbled into his arms at the bottom of the Infirmary stairs. I held onto him tight. I wanted him to take all the exhaustion created by adrenaline out of my body. His hug matched the intensity of mine. The pressure slowly started to tame my irritation.
"Did I tell you how thankful I am you made me breakfast this morning?" I grumbled into his shirt.
"Yes, you did. Was it a trying day?" He said, his concern showing through.
"Ugh, 'trying' doesn't even begin to cover what kind of day it was." I groaned.
"Then let us go get some noodles."
I snorted, "Not alcohol, Huh?"
"I thought you had tired of such things?"
"If I see another shot glass of vodka this cycle it'll be too soon." I playfully huffed.
He softly chuckled.
His hands slid down my back, leaving my body just as they brushed over the swell of my hips. The simple touch didn't escape the attention of my tired brain. My heart gleefully danced. With a gentle smile he placed my hand on his elbow. I hung onto him as we walked.
The starchy goodness of the noodles and Kagorn's ear to vent to helped settle and brighten my mood. He even took me to another place I'd never been. It was a cute little sweets shop owned by a Kabouter couple. The female baker and her husband, the chocolatier, were as delectably sweet as the treats they lovingly made by hand. Kagorn insisted I pick whatever I wanted. I put up a fight to made him chose his favorites instead. His particular picky tastes showed through. I was sure I'd never tasted such a perfect variety of desserts in my life. Without shame I licked the remnants off my fingers.
I sipped at the dessert tea, letting the tea cup warm my hands just as the bowl of broth had. The rich sweet cream that Kagorn suggest I add to it carried the flavors of subtle spices along my tongue. He had chosen a table near a window in the sweets shop. I let myself enjoy the simple beauty of the darkening sky.
How could have today turned out any more perfect?
"Are you feeling better?"
I looked back at him. His gently smiling face had that wrinkle of concern as he looked over the rim of his teacup.
So cute.
"So much better. You sure do know how to turn a bad day around. Thank you." I said in sincerity.
"You are always welcome. I dislike seeing you under such distress." He said quietly.
"It's just one day. I'm grateful that most of the time it isn't stupid crazy." I said in thought.
"Indeed. During my stay, I only truly saw you agitated once."
"I bet that was the day before you left."
"Yes, you had successfully drawn an infant, but at the expense of your lunch hour."
"Yeah…" I sipped at my tea.
My chest suddenly felt heavy with memories. I let my tea cup rest on the table. I looked into the blurry reflection of the liquid mirror.
"The hardest day I've ever had was when I found out you'd left..." I breathed.
I could feel his stare tickling across my face. His hand slid across the table to nimbly take my fingers from the cup. He firmly held them in his grasp.
"It tortured me to leave you in such a state." His voice was pained.
I looked up to find his face was solemn. His stare was focused and searching.
I squeezed his hand and smiled.
"It's not your fault. I should have expected it, it's part of your job. You weren't going to be there forever," I snorted, "And it's not like you could put your assignment on hold just to keep me company."
His eyes were still running over my face.
"I just thought you'd never come back." I quietly added.
"I will always come back for you." He whispered.
I soaked up the affectionate way his serious eyes looked at me. It had my heart pumping thick beats. His entrancing stare stopped time. It was so beautiful and vulnerable.
Raven…
With a breath, I exhaled to break out of his timeless grasp. I cleared my throat and squeezed his hand again before I let go.
"Oh common, it's been a good night. Let's not ruin the mood with me being silly, eh?" I chuckled.
A small smile flickered upon his lips.
Both of us went back to enjoying our tea.
We slowly sauntered back my place. A good sized pebble kept us entertained as we took turns kicking it down the street. A solid connection with the toe of his boot sent it traveling down the road before we turned a corner. We quickly moved out of sight when it bounced into the ankle of a human street vendor. I had to stifle my giggle of entertainment as Kagorn's grin turned mischievous. I'd never seen that look before, so I soaked it up in fascination.
Like so many times before, I found it difficult to put the key into the deadbolt. Time always seemed to drag on as I turned it.
There was movement in the corner of my eye. His palm had pressed into the door beside my head. That unique prickle ran along the back of my neck. It suddenly became hard to breathe.
"I am not yet ready for you to retire." Sultry whisper tantalized my eardrum.
His voice had me paralyzed for a moment. It was a struggle to swallow as I slowly turned to look at him. His face was incredibly close. There was that sensual smile on his lips. The detail in the snow white glow of his irises left me stunned. I still couldn't breath.
"Alright…" I choked out.
Dear heavens to betsy, that's the best response you could come up with?
He released a long sigh as his head slowly tilted. A shiver ran over me as his pupils began dilating.
"I have not made my interest in you a secret, Chellé." He said in slow quietness.
My heart started quivering.
By the gods…
"I know…"
"I am concerned about your continued neutrality towards me."
What? Are you blind? I want you so bad!
I frowned, "I've been anything but neutral."
"Truely?" There was a bit of surprise in his tone.
The words flew from my mouth, "Do you think I'd try to spend every possible moment with you if I wasn't just as interested?"
I wondered if he'd heard the desperate ache in my voice. The sudden twinkling that appeared in his eyes told me he did.
"So you find me favorable?"
"Of course I do."
He paused for a moment.
"My line of work does not intimidate you?" His question was worried.
"It is what it is."
He took a moment before he spoke again.
"I come and go unexpectedly. There will be no communication between us during those times. You will be unaware of my location and unable to contact me. Your life may be a target for my enemies." His voice faltered slightly.
"I understand the risks of getting involved with you." I said with certainty.
His eyes engulfed my vision as our faces became separated by a sliver of air. The humid heat of his breath tickling across my chin filled the void that was suddenly at my lips. I was sure I was falling into the depth of his eyes. Every sense in my body was jammed with his overwhelming presence.
"Will you be my beau?" His question was so soft, I almost didn't catch it.
My heart was throwing itself against my ribs.
Yes! Sweet niblets, yes!
"Yes, Raven..." I barely breathed.
The twinkling in his eyes exploded into sparkles. The beauty of them took what little air I had left out of my lungs. They slowly flicked between mine. I knew they were taking in every detail; trying to memorize everything they were seeing so they couldn't forget. His moment of silence had the anticipation rising in my neck.
Please just kiss me, Raven. I know you want to, and by the gods I want you to.
His eyes closed and my heart skipped.