This was bad. Definitely bad. What were people doing up here? Lines of cocaine? Having an orgy? He was braced for anything when they entered a dimly lit room. What he didn’t expect to see was the owner of the house, sitting on a couch and snacking on cookies, while his boyfriend snuggled up against him and took a nap. Around them, other guests sat in comfortable chairs and conversed while light music played from a flat stereo system on the wall. Aside from drinks and a few cigarettes, nothing wild seemed to be happening here.

Evan’s relief was short-lived because there he was. Standing in the center of the room and holding court with a circle of young guys was Tony. Or a minotaur, since he still wore his bull mask, lifting it occasionally to take a sip of beer.

“He probably won’t recognize me,” Evan mumbled. “It really was a long time ago.”

“Want to go back downstairs?” Orlando asked.

“No,” Evan said. “I’m not lying!”

Orlando held up his hands. “I didn’t say you were.”

“It felt like you were.” Evan met his eyes, which were hard to read. The blue of his irises were made more intense by the black fabric surrounding them. What sort of matador wore a mask, anyway?

“Let’s go jog his memory,” Orlando said. “I’m sure he’ll remember you.”

Evan nodded, swallowing against a dry throat. Orlando led the way, walking up to Tony with enviable ease and touching his arm to get his attention.

“Tony, I met an old friend of yours from high school. Ugh, take off that stupid mask for five seconds, okay?”

Evan stared as he did so. Had he ever been this close to Tony before? Maybe when leaving biology class, but Evan had been careful to keep his distance from hot guys back then. He hadn’t wanted anyone to figure out the truth, never choosing someone like Tony for his study partner. Still, he was sure Tony hadn’t been this hot back then. The slightly hairy chest, the dark hair under each armpit as the mask was pulled off, the way his arms flexed with each motion. And once that face was free—well, the photo was definitely a poor representation of the real deal.

Evan breathed in, amazed at how good Tony smelled. That had to be more than just cologne. Evan had spent enough time sniffing bottles in department stores to know they didn’t sell such a fragrance. Maybe part of the scent was cologne, but the rest was… what? Tony sweat? The man himself was looking Evan over, sizing him up. Before he had a chance to admit he had no clue who Evan was, he tried to instill doubt.

“Hello, Anthony,” he said. “It’s been a long time since biology class.”

Tony hesitated, looked him over one more time, eyes taking their time as they moved over his crotch. That was awkward. Or exciting. Maybe that’s what alpha dogs did. Eventually those hazel green eyes moved upward again to his fake hospital identification. His lips practically moved as he read it. Finally he made eye contact and smiled.

“Hey, if it isn’t Evan Hansen! Man! I barely recognized you.”

Evan breathed out in relief. “Same here. Of course the bull mask probably had something to do with that.”

Tony barked laughter, the groupies around him following suit a moment later. “So, Evan, you want a beer?”

“Yeah. Thanks.”

Evan had already drank one and was now abstaining so he could drive himself home, but holding a bottle would make him feel more natural, more secure. Tony gestured, one of his boys rushing off to fetch the drink.

Orlando didn’t hide his irritation at this, but turned his attention to other matters. “Evan Hansen here—” He paused, looking puzzled before continuing. “—was just defending your honor downstairs.”

“Oh really?” Tony asked, seeming genuinely interested.

Evan nodded. “A couple of guys were talking about doing unspeakable things to you and a bunch of others were getting a little too excited. It’s a good thing you’re up here where it’s safe, or you might have been mobbed.”

“I’m used to it,” Tony said. “So what have you been up to since school?”

“Computers,” Evan answered. Glorified tech support, really, but simply saying “computers” left so much to the imagination. Remaining vague meant he could be a software developer or something impressive like that. “What about you?”

“Computers,” Tony said with a smile.

Exactly. Not that Tony had anything to be ashamed of. All those YouTube advertisement royalties must add up quickly. He probably raked in the cash, not to mention the extra earnings from selling autographs to desperate fans. Of course now Evan’s obsession could come in handy. He already knew so much about Tony. All he had to do was draw attention to what they had in common.

“I like the bull mask,” Evan said. “Reminds me of the Ifrit summon in Final Fantasy.” He made sure to look embarrassed and even thought he felt his cheeks flush. “You know, the big guy with the horns? Uh, no one knows what I’m talking about, do they?”

“I do!” Tony said. “I’m an old school gamer, and I love the Final Fantasy series!”

“That can’t be true.” Evan shook his head. “A guy like you doesn’t play video games. If you did, you’d have a keg instead of a six-pack.”

Tony beamed at the compliment. “What’s your excuse then, doctor? You’re looking pretty tight beneath those scrubs.”

Oh, this was too good! The stuff of wet dreams! If a small crowd wasn’t around them, Evan would be in seventh heaven. Or in Tony’s arms. As it was, he was attracting quite a few envious if not downright aggressive stares. The worst was coming from Tony’s boyfriend, whose narrowed eyes kept darting down to Evan’s nametag.

“Hansen,” Orlando said, frown deepening. “Evan Hansen… You’re a fan!”

Evan blanched. “What?”

“I recognize your name from the autographed photos we sent out recently! Your address was the only one in the area.” Orlando snapped his fingers. “I even joked about saving a stamp and delivering the photo in person. Remember that?”

“I do,” Tony said, looking to Evan. “You’re a fan of mine?”

“Of course he is! How else would he know who you are? Do you think it’s a complete coincidence that he started talking about one of your favorite video games?” Orlando turned to face Evan. “And for the record, the reason he’s in such good shape is because I drag his ass away from his gaming marathons and make sure he hits the gym with me. And the only thing that looks tight on you, fan boy, is your bulge. I hate to think why.”

Evan’s cheeks really were flushing now. Those envious expressions had become amused sneers. In the space of a few moments, he’d gone from feeling totally high to completely humiliated. That’s what he got for playing with the big boys!

“We really did go to high school together,” Evan mumbled.

Then he dropped his eyes to the floor and instinctually walked toward open air. He wanted to get away from them, from the house entirely. He made it outside, but unfortunately he was only on a large balcony. He walked to its edge, wishing he could fly and considered jumping. He wouldn’t, of course. It’s not like this was the first time he’d embarrassed himself.

Evan breathed out, his breath a puff of steam in the cool air. He noticed the revelers in the yard below and the jumbled mess of parked cars. Then he gazed over the hills of silhouetted trees, wishing he could disappear into their dark and quiet comfort.

“So you’re really a fan of mine, huh?”

Evan spun around, back to the wooden banister.

Tony stood there, wearing a lopsided grin. “It’s okay,” he said. “I love my fans. I always say that in my videos and I mean it. I think it’s cool that you’re here.”

“I didn’t know you’d be at this party,” Evan said defensively. “I’m not a creepy stalker or anything. It’s a complete coincidence.”

“Too bad,” Tony said, moving closer. “I’ve always wanted my own stalker. All that obsession, need, and dedication. It would be a big-ass compliment, really.”

Evan fought back a smile. “Sorry to disappoint,” he said. “I’m barely even a fan. I only bought the autograph because I worried you’d starve without my money.”

“It’s a good thing you did.” Tony scratched his abs. “I’m always hungry these days. Know what I mean?”

Evan shook his head. “Nope.”

Tony laughed. “You’re fun! Come back to the party. Have that beer with me.”

“I don’t think your boyfriend would like that.”

“Him? Orlando is just overprotective, that’s all. He understands my needs.”

Evan found this confusing. Did they have an open relationship? Tony had a video about commitment, and he’d preached the importance of monogamy. Was it possible to have an open relationship and still be committed? Or maybe Evan was misinterpreting the statement entirely.

“I’d rather stay out here,” he said. “The cool air feels good.”

“It does,” Tony said, “although my nipples are saying it’s a little cold. Look at them! They’re like two little rockets!”

Evan didn’t glance down, but he did laugh.

Tony grinned in response. “That’s better. I’d hate if one of my fans had a bad Halloween. Especially if it was sort of my fault.”

“It’s not your fault,” Evan insisted, “and I’m enjoying myself. Especially now.”

“Me too.” Tony glanced over his shoulder, then back again. “You know, they have paddle boats out back. Maybe you should slip down to the dock, and I’ll meet you in five.”

No way could that be misinterpreted. Evan felt torn. Part of him—a very specific part—felt excited about the idea of slipping away somewhere with Tony for a little starlit romance. But the rest of Evan felt uneasy. As much as he tried to ignore Orlando’s cameos in Tony’s videos, he was undeniably a part of his life. Wasn’t he? Or maybe Orlando was just an emotional cameo as well. Maybe Tony was still trying to find the right person to give all that love to.

Evan stood on his tippy toes to see over Tony’s shoulder. In the doorway, framed in a rectangle of warm light, was Orlando. He was just waiting there, arms crossed over his chest, as if curious what would happen.

“I think I’m going to call it a night,” Evan said. “It’s been a long day and I’m really tired.”

Tony glanced over his shoulder, his expression understanding. “Maybe you’re right.”

“It was nice talking with you,” Evan said. “Don’t let this go to your head, but your videos are awesome. There’s a reason you have so many subscribers, and it’s not just because you go shirtless so often.”

Tony’s eyes shined at the compliment. “Don’t be a stranger.” Then he clapped a hand on Evan’s shoulder. It felt warm and strong. “Hey! Tell me your username so I can recognize you.”

“ManCurious,” Evan said. “God that sounds dumb when I say it out loud. It’s supposed to be a joke.”

Realization dawned on Tony’s features. “I get it. Okay then, Boy Wonder, I’ll see you around. Say hi to Batman for me.”

“Will do,” Evan said.

He kept his gaze averted as he reached the doorway. Orlando stepped aside to let him pass, the red matador cape catching Evan’s eye. Should he turn around and charge? Knock his opponent off the balcony and claim Tony for his own? He was tempted, mostly because he was so tired of not getting what he wanted; His own great love. Maybe he had come close tonight. All the way down the stairs he wondered if he’d blown his big chance. Once outside, Evan walked around the back of the house and down a hill slick with wet grass.

When he reached the paddle boat dock, he refused to look back, to betray the hope burning inside his chest. Instead he glanced up at the stars and waited for them to grant his wish. When they didn’t, when his body grew so cold that he started shivering, Evan sighed, walked back to his car, and drove away.

* * * * *