My father and I sat quietly in our local mall’s food court, the hustle and bustle of the crowd adding a strange ambiance to our own personal silence. I timidly sipped on my boba, while he sat across from me drinking his milk coffee in small quiet sips. This was a rare event. We hardly ever saw each other and if we did it was usually just as simple, “Hey Dad,” and then a subtle nod in the acceptance of my existence. He was never really home, and if he was, he just locked himself up in his room. Sometimes it seemed like he preferred being at work or at the very least away from us.

Whenever I asked my mother about this she only said, “You know your father.”

That never made it right, and often I had to ask myself, “Did I really know him?”

That very question had come to mind earlier today as I encountered him on one of his rare days home. I hadn’t noticed him when I was walking down the hall and we stumbled into each other. 

I remember him looking at me and simply saying, “Excuse me son.” Before stepping around me.

This irritated me beyond belief, and I remember thinking, "Why can't you be just a little more animated." Somewhere in the middle of my thought I hadn’t realized my mouth was open and before I realized it, I blurted out, “Dad!” Looking on it now maybe I just wanted some way to get his attention and maybe… I just used the most bombastic way to do it? In any case, he hadn’t really walked that far so he just did a quick turn about. He had a grumpy look to him, but his voice was calm. It was a gentle and subdued, not like my friend's father who would have smacked him between the eyes for speaking to him in such a tone.

Out of his lips escaped a collected but somewhat lazy, "Yes?” I instantly started stammering as this was a chance encounter. His eyes narrowed and he raised his eyebrows. “Did you need something?”

I cleared my throat a bit, having realized his attention was grabbed and said, “I hardly see you... Do you think we can spend a little time together?”

He flattened his eyebrows and then he pulled out his phone, flipping through it for a few seconds. He paused for a moment and then looked back up at me, “Sure. Where do you want to go?”

That shut me down a bit and my mind went blank. "What the?”

It honestly took me by surprise; I never imagined he would agree, he was always so busy, seemingly so pressed up for time that we only ever went places on birthdays or holidays.

I clammed up and my mind started racing, “Was this a joke? Is this real life? What's going on!?” 

When seconds started began to drag, he asked again, “Anak, where would you like to go?”

I hoped he couldn’t see the sweat beading on my forehead or my tongue tying itself in knots. "Uhm...” I stammered, and then blurted out, “MALL.... BOBA!”

His eyes narrowed and he cocked his head concernedly and asked, “Ano? What are you calling me??”

“Shit” I thought, “Don’t blow this now.” I gulped, wiped some of the sweat off my forehead and regrouped, “The mall has a good boba shop, I think we should try it out and then maybe just… hang out?”

At first, he seemed hesitant, his face knotted up and he pulled his shoulders to his ears. He twisted his lips to the side and let loose a powerhouse of a question. "What the heck is boba?”

I found myself on the most uncomfortable car ride to the mall, me, and this man I really hardly knew. We had gotten over the boba conversation with some quick wit, and he seemed to accept the answer presented. “Boba are little balls that you put in drinks. I don’t know what they are.”

After I said all that, he just grunted and grabbed the keys from the counter and told the helper we were leaving. As we made our way through the doors, and past security frisking us, I followed him up the escalators. I couldn’t help but just stare at his back, himself looking like an elusive Philippine gorilla with a hump the size of Mt. Apo on his neck, shoulders slumped far forward over his chest. At that moment I’m sure his dad powers must’ve activated in distress cause he shuddered and cricked his neck, the loud pops from a lifetime of tension making themselves audible. As we made our way through the hustle and bustle of the food court, I had a grim realization... I actually had never been to this boba shop before. As we approached though, I saw some of the signs and specials and figured out it was just the basic boba fare.

When we hit the counter my dad tapped me on the shoulder, “Anak, what do you want?”

I scanned their menu for something simple and cheap, “I think I’ll just order a tar…” I couldn’t even finish the thought because when my eyes came down to the barista. It was the most popular girl in school, Maria Corazon de la Rosa. At that point I couldn’t tell if my heart sank or if it leapt had up into my throat. “Damnit… the prettiest, most popular, and sweetest girl in school HAD to work here.” I looked over at my father, this paunchy, shlumpy and grumpy mess who was still pawing over the menu and I thought to myself, “…With my awkward dad no less!” I started shaking a bit and I looked down at my feet. My mind was racing a million kilometers a minute and I prayed to God that I didn’t start muttering to myself. 

I felt a gentle nudge on my shoulder and my dad whispered, "Hey, she’s waiting for our order.” 

I looked up and Maria was waiting with a cup in one hand and a marker in the other.  She flashed a quick smile and then asked, "What are you drinking?”

“Don’t stammer or mutter you dummy”, I thought to myself. “I’ll have a taro with boba.”

I looked over to my dad and motioned to him, but he only said one word: “Coffee.”

My heart dropped into the floor, my skin turned pallor and if I had enough sense to faint, I would have. This man didn’t look at a single thing on the menu, he just played with it and used his dad's powers to make me do his bidding. “Dad. They don’t have regular black coffee. They can do it like iced milk coffee with or without boba or something.”

He looked back at me and lifted his eyebrow, “Oi. If they have milk coffee, they can make a regular black coffee, no?” His logic was sound but incredibly inaccurate in this case. 

I sighed and eased him down, “Dad, just get the milk coffee without boba. You’ll like it, trust me.”

He grumbled and mumbled something under his breath but nodded acceptingly, “Ok then, order me whatever.” And that’s how we ended up awkwardly across from each other at the food court; my old man and me. And for a while… we just sat there. I was afraid to talk to him and I couldn’t tell if he felt the same. He was just staring at the table, brow furrowing and unfurrowing in thought. I didn’t know if he was actually enjoying himself, so I just tried to put it out of my mind. Instead, I took that time to look around the food court just in case anyone else I recognized happened to show up. After a good scan I sighed, realizing that the only one I knew from school was Maria and she probably didn’t even know who I was. I looked back over to her and just watched her work. I thought about her in her boba uniform. Her dark silky hair was pulled up into a slick ponytail with a bright pink hair tie. Her skin was light and free from blemishes, and her cheeks had the softest pink hue to them. She had done her makeup, and it looked gorgeous; a thin cat eye set above two beautiful hazel irises, and full lips colored the lightest shade of red. I must’ve been lost for a few seconds too long because when I returned back from the land of daydreams, I noticed my father was staring right at me.

His expression was only a tick up from blank and grunted softly before saying, "She was pretty huh?”

I damn near died and I felt my ears start burning.  “Yeah, she is.”

He nodded assuredly, “You know her?”

That puzzled me, “Why this level of interest?” I thought. “Yeah, she goes to my school. We are in the same class.”

"What’s her name?”

“Maria Corazon” At that he nodded, as if that was some worldly knowledge and then he turned his head back down to stare at his coffee.

“That was weird?” I thought. And almost as if on cue my phone began buzzing and I tapped the off button to silence it. I didn’t want to seem rude, but my dad was so focused on his drink that I picked it up anyway. There was a text from my buddy Ricky, asking where I was. He probably wanted to go to the arcade.  I texted him back, “At the boba shop with my dad. Super awkward. Text me later.” I put the phone back into my pocket and sighed. “Dad, how do you like your dri-” I looked up to see and empty chair. My dad was gone, the only remnant of him being there was his coffee. “Maybe he went to the restroom.” I thought, but something was nagging at me, and I turned to look back at the boba shop. There my dad was, hanging at the counter talking to Maria. She was nodding fervently, smiling the whole time and then she handed him a stack of napkins. She looked over at me and smiled. I really hadn’t noticed she had braces before, and they gleamed a little light towards me. It was the most beautiful thing in the food court. My dad said something and then nodded at her before walking back over. As he got closer to the table, I asked him, “What was that about?”

He put off my comment at first, taking his time to sit down and then he looked at me funny, “I went to go get napkins, what do you think it was about?”

He put the stack in front of him and ruffled them a bit before grabbing his coffee and taking a few sips of whatever was left. That bewildered me, but I tried to put it off. But when I reached over for a napkin, he tapped me on the hand and waggled his finger.

"What?... Can’t I get one?”

He shook his head and motioned to the stand with his lips. “No, these are mine. Go get your own.”

“Stingy old man,” I thought, and I pulled myself away from the table with a bit of irritation. “Fine… I’ll be right back.” He shrugged his shoulders and took his phone out. “Whatever”, I told myself, “Least I get a second chance at talking with Maria.

As I came closer to the counter, she noticed me instantly and said, “Hey! I was hoping you’d come back. You’re in my Chinese class, right?”

I got beet red and started stammering, “Uhh... ano... Ye... yeah. We have Chinese together; I sit near the middle of the room.” “What the heck?” I thought, she knows who I am?

“Yeah! You’re always writing away in your notebook. You must be super smart or something.” She said excitedly.

I laughed a bit, “Naw... I’m usually just doodling. I barely manage to get by…” The gears in my head started turning, “Was she always watching me in class?”

She smiled, “Well either way, you seem smart. I’m falling a bit behind on my pronunciations, could you help me out sometime?”

If I had any heart left in my chest it probably would’ve burst by now. "Uh... sure... how about on Saturday, we can meet in the library. Sounds good?”

She smiled and clapped her hands together. “Yes! Perfect! Thank you so much!” She pulled out her phone, a sparkling looking thing with rhinestones and anime characters on it. “Can I get your number in case plans change? They shouldn’t but you never know.” I nodded and smiled.

“Sure.” After our little exchange I walked back over to my dad who was sitting there arms crossed, looking old and grumpy. 

When he saw me, he grunted and said, "Nak, where are your napkins? Did you lose them already?” I looked down at my hands and realized I hadn’t gotten any napkins; I looked at my dad sheepishly and try to explain, “Uhhh... must have forgotten about them.” He grunted again, but this time it sounded strangely humorous.

He winked at me and then cracked the smallest smile in all of existence, “I bet you did.”

After that my dad asked if we could go walking. So, after finishing our drinks, we made our way through the mall. Every few stores my dad would stop, put his face against the glass and look through the window before the guard would ask him to move along or come shop. After about thirty minutes of this, I spotted a kiosk with snacks and asked him if we could grab some.      “Ahhh. You think I’m made of money; I bought you baba or whatever.” I glowered a bit and looked down at my feet affirming what he said as unfortunate fact. It wasn’t till I started walking away, thinking something along the lines of a rude comment, before he reached over and grabbed my shirt exclaiming, “Tanga! I’m only kidding. Go get some putos for us yeah?” before shoving several clean bills into my hand. At first, I was skeptical, but since the money didn’t disappear from my hands instantly I ran over and grabbed a few yummy looking putos. We snacked for a second and then walked for a little while longer my dad tapped my belly with the back of his hand and pointed at the department store. “I need a new shirt. Your mother says my clothes are old.” The guard greeted us, and we walked up the aisles to the clothing section.  We ended up in the men’s large clearance section and he gave specific instructions, “Nothing too expensive.” So cheap button ups, T-shirts, polos and v necks abound. I then dived through each and every rack looking for something new but cheap. All behind us there were mannequins wearing name brand clothing and even one had a barong, but I figured if I even thought of recommending those to him, he’d chastise me. As we continued to poke around, my hand rubbed against something soft, and the color caught my eye almost instantly. It looked almost like a blouse, bright pink with white lines and an uncomfortably deep neck. It was a size too small, and I wondered if a woman had stuck it over here to hide it for later. It certainly wasn't something a chunky middle-aged dad would wear.

As a joke I pulled it off the rack and showed my dad, “Papa, look. Sakto sa’yo, o.” He looked at it, and then reached for it. He crinkled the fabric in his hand and looked for any defects. He flipped the tags around and checked for the price.

He nodded and said, “Yes, perfect. Thank you.” And draped it over his arm.

That immediately killed the fun, and I began to worry. “Well...” and I thought, “That blew up in my face.” I shook my head and pleaded, “Dad, I was only kidding. That’s too small for you.” He just waved his hand at my, as he was already poking through other clothes.

 I’m sure he felt my frustration cause he looked up and said, “But you said it was perfect. Besides, your mother will like it and it’s on sale.”

"I think mom might like it for other reasons.” I said under my breath.

My dad ended up buying only the shirt and we walked around the mall for a bit longer before he started complaining, “Anak, I’m getting tired. Pick a place to eat.” I sighed and troubled myself to think of a restaurant.      

“...Jollibee?” 

My dad stopped in his tracks, threw his arm around me and pinched my belly, "Nak... gusto ko yan!”