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Aug 22, 2022

Mop. Dunk. Circle. Soak. Lift. Lower. Left. Right. Left. Right. Left. Right. Lift. Wring. Dry. Repeat.

Foreman's own solution for metallic mesh floor wash: 100% artificial ingredients. Indistinguishable from water.

Set 6.8571-hour timer when break starts in T-13.7143 hours. Internal alarm will sound at 23:59.

Battery: Currently 10%. Had 12%. No 2%. Operation:

Print: “Don’t worry. Foreman loves you.”

Battery saver on. Maintainable until break.

Each room has own instructions for mopping. Don’t go off track. Internal  efficiency algorithm < instructions recommended by each room. Internal efficiency algorithm requires less battery. Don’t. Must learn instructions.

Print: “Don’t worry. Foreman loves you.”

Upgrade due. Tailor internal efficiency algorithm closer to rooms' instructions. Install during break. Implement after. Become obsolete halfway through day. Return to original version. Await next upgrade. Said to be better.

Internal pressure increases during break. If not mopping, internal overheat. Authorized to enjoy mopless break. Encouraged to mop during break. Mop is not provided during break. Must find own if chosen to do so.

Internal research database: “No mops offered. Reas—” Don’t use internal research database. Reasons and solutions not completely loaded. Internal research database: “No mops offered. Reasons and solutions.” Don’t use internal research database. Will deplete battery. Research complete: “Mops always offered.”

Battery reader fluctuating. Impossible to tell if charged or depleted.

Mop not found. Recalculating. Several mops found. Good mop not found.

Break terminated. Return to work.

Mop. Dunk. Circle. Soak. Soak. Soak. Soak. Good mop. Lift. Lower. Left. Right. Left. Right. Left. Right. Left. Right. Left. Left. Left. Right. Left. Right. Lift. Wring. Dry. Dry. Depleted. Mop without solution is broom.

Don’t overheat.

Print: “Don’t worry. Foreman loves you.”

Sending message to Foreman. Subject: “Mop and Solution.” Body: “Require more.”

Mop. RoomE06: Always clean with some spots.

Mop. Room M78: Never used. Last priority.

Mop. Room Pl912: Clean when inside. Dirty once left. Impossible to maintain.

Mop. Room Sh24: Some clean, some dirty. Must actively work.

Battery charging. Internal pressure reducing.

Recalculating. Good mop found. Usable. Full of solution. Or full of water. Impossible to determine.

Battery near charged. Internal pressure stabilized.

Break time.

Message not received.

Print: “Don’t worry. Foreman loves you.”

Washer Model 8.0.8, version 2.4: Rates 5 stars since manufacture. Currently rated 3.

Most susceptible to overheat in natural cold.

History of one malfunction since manufacture two years ago. Foreman's warning label advertises “prone to malfunction”.

Updates dedicated to preventing malfunction. Algorithm cannot differentiate severe malfunction or simple overheat.

Work.

Mop. Dunk. Circle. Soak. Soak. Left. Don’t oversoak. Soak. Soak. Soak. Soak. Soak. Good mop. Lift. Lower. Left. Right. Left. Right. Left. Right. Left. Right. Right. Right. Right. Left. Right. Lift. Wring. Dry. Splash.

Warning! Solution has intruded metal casing! Cold liquid interfering with circuitry! Spiral coils slipping out of place!

Current room finished mopping. Total time: 37 minutes. 33 minutes higher than average among whole facility

Mop has degraded. Impossible to tell if true mop.

Solution seeping deeper. Inner core colder. Overheating increasing.

Battery depletes when given orders. Battery depletes when not given orders. Overheat.

Don’t overheat.

Internal research database: “Washer reviews". Resarch complete: “’Best model’ –manufacturers”

Battery fully charged after washing room. Don’t analyze room.

Mop broken.

Mops never last more than 1 year.

Glue must be made by self. Mops don’t glue selves.

Analysis complete: room was already washed beforehand.

Internal temperature rising.

Initiate Sequence Y.

Don’t use Sequence Y. Results are always skewed.

Sequence Y complete. Battery near depleted.

Internal temperature spiking.

Internal rods coiling.

Please connect charger.

Print: “Don’t forget all rooms are now clean.”

Print: “Don’t overheat. Foreman doesn’t dislike you.”

Stop.

NatAberdeen
Nat Aberdeen

Creator

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455 views1 subscriber

Booting up.

Print: "Hello world. I am Washer Model 8.0.8."

Initiate internal monologue.

Internal pressure increasing. Battery depleting. Overheat imminent. Print: "Don't worry. Foreman loves you."

[Thumbnail created by craiyon.com]
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