It was a sunny, summer, Sunday morning in Sapporo. The birds were chirping, the sun beamed through a window. "Oh, fuck me... Do I have to get up?" an 18-year, purple-haired and purple-eyed man got up, his hair a mess. Meet Hiro Amatisto-Arabaev. He's of Japanese and Azerbaijani descent. He looked to see a father and his daughter playing. He got on his black, Gengar sticker-studded laptop and hit up Ichigo Lopez, his Japanese-Mexican friend, on Facebook Messenger. "Are you there?" (Unlike Hiro, Ichigo is aromantic, dislikes children and doesn't swear.)
"Yeah, what's up?" Ichigo asked.
"I want a child, but I'm single."
"How would you want one of those crotch goblins?" his mestizo amigo raised his right eyebrow. "They're gross!"
"Other than the fact I have you, I'm lonely." Hiro went to go get a SPAM-and-cheese rice ball and started eating it. "This is my breakfast, some onigiri and some Buldak Carbonara."
"I'm having red bean soup. Again... It's addicting!" Ichi slurped his bean-filled concoction. "There's the Ishikaru Orphanage downtown. They have a multitude of ankle biters you can adopt!"
Hiro ate the last of his noods and rice ball. "I'll go there now," he responded. "I'll see you when I get back, wey."
"Go get 'em, tiger!" Ichigo hung up, as his violet-eyed friend got in his purple Lexus and drove off. (Song: 'JUMP [Loboski Bootleg]' by BLACKPINK)
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