As i was dessending the steps to the subway I need to take to get back home form work I tought back on how did I ended like this, I work at a private highschool were the alumnie tend to think more with the wallet of their parents than with their own heads, not all of them, there are some nice kids amoungs them, kids that are very involved in the class and are genuanly worried about their future as they understand that daddy´s influence can open some doors but their own skills will have to carry them, I like those kids, often asking me questions about the real world, the other ones, well some days are better than others, somedays is a struggle to get them off their phones or tablets, somedays some flat out say I don’t care my dad is… or If I wanted to I could get you fire and then we get into a meeting where they end up crying and appologisng once their imminent failure in the class cant be fix with money or threats, some of my coworkers bend over way before things scalets to that point, however when I become a teacher I made a promise to myself none of my students gets left behind so yeah even if it gets me more headaches I welcome them if it means helping the wayward students.

Once on the lower floor of the subway, I look at an elderly lady, her hair neatly tied in a messy gray bun, shaking not from her age but from the panic of not knowing how to use her subway card. “Excuse me, ma´am, is everything okay?” I asked she looks at me form behind her hard frame glasses attached to her neck by a gold string “Oh sunny, I´m sorry I… this thing is difficult, my granddaughter usually comes with me but she had to take a test today” I nodded and point to the white squear in the machin “you put your card here and then if the light turns green it means you can pass” she looks at the squear and to the card in her hand and nods, sure enough her card is read by the machine and the bars lift letting the woman through “Thanks sunny you are so helpful, whats your name?” I pass my own card and look at the sweat old lady looking at me from the other side “Richard, Ma´am” she looks on her pocket and hands me a lavender colored candy “here Richard, you were so sweet” I nod and walk off to my plataform, she remainds me of my grandma, when she was alive she used to give me candy whenever she saw me.

I get my earpods in as my train arrives, for good measure I pop the candy in my mouth, the lavender flavor already melting in my mouth by the time I sit, im exhausted although, normally I wouldn’t sleep in the subway, today I feel extra drain, I hug my bag tight against my chest, close my eyes and try to find an angule where my head feels comfortable, it lolls to the side as I let the music play and try not to fall a sleep I only need a few minuts of my eyes close to recharge enough to get home, for the first few minuts nothing happens I just fell the movement of the train as it swaeis form left to right but then I sence the pressens of someone infront of me, at first I pay it no mind people need to get home form work and someone just so happen to be infornt of me, but thing change when I feel the leg of this person brushing against mine, not by accident, just like if they wanted to get my attention or worst, my eyes open and glear to the person infront of me, my hand already a fist in case they are itching for a fight and then my mind goes blank as I saw someone smiling at me, someone I was hoping never to see again in my life “Hey Rich” he says as is we were the same people from way back when, curly hair shorter than the last time I had seen him, green eyes that shine just like emeralds, and that smile, that stupid smile I once punched the light off, “What do you want, Michel?” and i fell as the lavender flavor desapers form my mouth and turns into vile when I uter his name.

I sigh and reap the earpods fomr my ears and tossed them int  my bag, “wow, you still remember me” I felt a vain in my head popping when he sais that, hard to forget someone like him “yes I do, and becose of that I think the next stop is mine” I told him and try to get up but he blocks my way “oh what a coincidens the next one is my stop too” I rise my eyebrow at his totally not fake allegation “right, why don’t you get near the door so you can get down?” he laughs for a moment and the sound of his laughter cuts me like a knife, “well, something tells me that if I go down before you, you will stay on the train” I can feel the anger bobbling up inside me “so the next one is not your stop” I confront him he shakes his head “I know is not yours ether” my gaze morphs into my kendo glear, the one that channels the phres I will cut you in half he flinches and blurs out “I-I-I´m not stalking you really!” “Looks to me that way” people are starting to look now, he looks around and realize how he is coming off “Look I just wanted to talk to you pal” and that sets me off for some reason is not the stalking or the fact that he is currently blocking my way for some reason the fact that he just calls me pal sent me over the edge.

I drag his head closer to mine so only he can hear me whispering “Listen closely Pal” I heard him swallowing when the pal part leave my mouth full of anger and venom, and that’s my quieu that I have his full attention “unless you want me to make a big scene here, one were I assure you, ends with you bleeding in the floor from your nose, you will get our of this train in the next stop, you get me?” he nods slowly, the color drained form his face he walks towards the doors and looks at me, inted of been upset that I defied him he looks sad, almost remosful a look I had never seen in his face before, he steps down and waits for the doors to close, before the beeping stops, he sais “I- I just wanted to talk… I´ll try again some other day” I scoffed as the doors close separating us and once the train starts moving my legs become jelly, I fall to my knees gasping for air as a powerful panic attack takes over me, the cart starts to spin and brething becomes so difficult that the act of filling my longues with air is an herculian task, I keep gasping for air until I felt a shakie hand on my back “Sunny… here take another one” the same old lady form before hands me another candy, I keep breathing hard, opening the wraper is difficult but it help me focuse until I get the candy opened and pop it in my mouth, little by little it disoves in my mouth and with the flavor unfurrowing a cascade of calmness washes over me, I hadn’t had a panic attack like this in years, coincidently the day I stop seeing Michel they stopped and now with his return is not surpricing that they would waltz into my life again.

Before the old lady left the cart, she placed her hand again on my shoulder. “Richard, if that man bullies you again, he will get an earful from me,” she winkes and walks out. I stood up quickly, “Miss!” I call her, she turns around and looks at me “What's your name?” “Sandra, dear” I nod “Thanks, Sandra I-I really apricieat it” she smiles and walks off as the tran move again, people still look at me and I had to talk to train security but I assure them that Michel is not a threat at least not to me, but with the new sence of discomfort I almost ran out of the tran the second the doors open I practically run out of the sub-way station and straight to my house, where the energetic barking of Mika my husky greets me “Hi Mika, miss me?” she wags her tail and brushes against me braking a little, but her entusiasum faids and she tilts her head, whining and licking my hand, I don’t realize when the tears formed in my eyes but in a moment im cruching hugging my knees and sub into my forarm “Mika… I had a bad day” she nussles into the crabice of my neck and whines with me as is she tries to say “Don’t be sad, Don’t be sad, Be happy, oh please be happy!” and after a moment of vulnerability I took a deep breath and smile “you are right Mika, come on lets get your food ready, I´ll take a shower and then we watch a movie” Mika´s tail moves furiously behind her as she manage to cheer me up.