"Clarice, dear... Are you sure about this?" My mom asked me worriedly, her brows were furrowed in distress. She held both my shoulders with trembling hands, tears welling up in her eyes.
"Clarice..." My dad spoke with a grim expression, his lips pursed. He approached mom and glanced at her; he shook his head in resignation. "Flory, dear. You know how stubborn our daughter can be."
Mom looked at me with a complicated expression, as if she were making a decision that would literally cost me my life. As she let go of my shoulders, her hands continued to tremble, trying her best to distance herself from me, preventing herself from taking away my last chance at freedom. "Wilfred, even with that knowledge, I just hoped that I could try to dissuade her." She sobbed.
I glanced at her with an insecure smile, my chest feeling stifled. I might be doing something idiotic. Something that my parents would definitely worry about. Something that might even cost me my life... But, would I regret this decision?
To be honest...
I don't know.
Everything is uncertain.
I'm not even sure that what I would be doing would be fruitful and worthwhile, but I wanted to.
It was something that I must do, or else, I would totally regret it.
I just contradicted myself, didn't I?
Everything was all messed up, and I was trying my best to fix up the pieces.
I hugged my parents. I hugged them tightly, hoping that it wouldn't be my last. "Mom, Dad..." I trailed off, feeling myself choking with emotion. I tightly closed my eyes and controlled my breathing. "Please... I should, I must do this..." I said desperately.
Mom and Dad embraced back; their figures stiff yet still full of warmth, I sighed in obvious relief.
"Clarice, immediately call us when you arrive there, okay?!" My mom exclaimed.
Dad looked at me seriously, his narrowed eyes not even blinking. "Clarice, be careful."
I laughed softly, unconsciously making them laugh too. I nodded. "Of course." I pulled my bag over my shoulder and held the plane ticket in my hand tightly. I hugged them one last time and walked towards the airport with determination. Maybe it was more of my stubbornness, but I still decided that I would do this.
I really miss him...
When that thought passed my mind, my chest ached painfully and I did my utmost best to prevent myself from crying.
But I know he does not.