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Immature audiences only

GLACK

GLACK

Oct 08, 2018

The following content is intended for mature audiences.

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Sam (23 years old), lived in a green house, surrounded by a green garden. His house was well furnished and had all the amenities a middle class person in a tv commercial would have. However, Sam wasn't in a commercial, furthermore, he had never had a job.

Now... I'm sure you have several theories explaining how Sam could have come into the possesion of the house, in addition to the oled 4k tv and the antique leather couch in the luxuriously spacious living room within said house. I am sorry to say your theory is probably incorrect, and to those who are still confident that they theirs isn't: Sam didn't win it after a divorce, he didn't win the lottery, he didnt win a bet, his distant nigerian relative didn't send him a part of his royal fortune, he didn't inherit anything from any family members, he did't murder the previous owner of the house and decided to live there until the ramen packets and the twinkies ran out, he didn't manipulate the feelings of a dying old lady or a cancer patient so that they would entrust him with all their possesions after they had died, and he didn't accidentally adopt a hamster that used to belong to a recently deceased, extremely wealthy blanket designer from Austria who explicitly wrote in his will, that his hamster was to receive all his material possesions, in addition to a full body massage from Bendict Cumberbatch and a piña colada (also made by Benedict Cumberbatch). The truth is much less believable than that: he inherited it (dramatic pause followed by a quick but deep inhalation of air)... from a scandanavian sofa he married in Madagascar while getting shitfaced at the funeral of prince Juan's pet monkey that was completely made out of Michael Jackson's hand-woven pubic hair combined with petrified mammoth shit and cocai... I'm just kidding, he accidentally adopted the hamster obviously.

Glack is what I was on when I wrote this.

Also, I had no idea where I was going with this so lets just end it here

puertanoa
Village Nightingale

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Immature audiences only
Immature audiences only

70 views1 subscriber

A bunch of short, unrelated stories constructed in a fashion unrestricted by the petty standards of reality and conventional storylines, yet heavily influenced by the age of comedic diversity nurtured by memes.

Rated I for immature, imbecilic and incredibly retarded
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GLACK

GLACK

70 views 0 likes 0 comments


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