She looked outside the window deep in thought and continued to answer my question.

“I think that’s what living refers to.  Paying attention to someone… Loving someone… Hating someone… Having fun being with someone. Taking someone’s hand. That’s what it means to live.”

“If you’re all alone, you can’t tell that you exist. Your relationship with others is what defines being alive. I know my mind exists since I can interact with others. I know my body exists because others can touch me. That’s where the purpose of being alive comes from.”

“Just like how we’ve both chosen to live this moment here and now~”

Then she looked at me with her usual radiant smile… and that’s all I could remember whenever I thought about her.

Six words. To the casual observer, they probably came off as a dark joke, or something sinister from a cultist. The first time I heard her say them, I thought something along those lines.

The me of the past would have this thought, entertain it for a short while, before discarding and wrapping myself up in a novel. But now, I let those thoughts linger just a little longer. The anonymous faces I'd observe became the faces of her friends, I tried to make the ones that looked like Kyoko-san go by as fast as I could.

Between her and I, those six words were something deeper than I could have anticipated. I could still recall her face when she first told me that phrase.

"I Want To Eat Your Pancreas"

I had debated and written and erased countless messages before deciding on what I should tell her. With a tap of my finger, the message was sent.

I placed my phone down, internally relieved yet terrified of what I had just done.

How would she react?

Would she understand the words I didn't say, or would she even notice them in the first place?

I could feel the slight movement of a bead of sweat sliding down my back, even as the cafe I waited in was at a comfortable 70.

My gaze wandered out the window, seeing but not seeing. The faceless crowd of people outside the cafe existed in a whole different world than me.

What would one of them think if they looked in now and saw me? A teen sitting alone at the window bar in a cafe, looking aimlessly at the outside world?

Would they notice the subtle changes as he went from relieved to nervous, back and forth relentlessly?

I calmed myself slightly, enough to grab my coffee cup without the risk of spilling the warm drink inside, and took a small drink. The warm liquid warmed me up, and washed away any lingering emotions. As I savored the taste, I looked down to the novel in front of me.

The unassuming cover was quite plain, simply colored in red and yellow. The more I thought about it, I realized it was almost an exact copy of her diary, albeit without the orange block. I hadn't really looked into the book much, simply picking it up and checking the price before taking it to the counter.

"Just another way she's affected me"

I thought to myself.

I flipped it open, and began to read, losing myself in the words that it held. The soft music of the cafe, the smell of sweet coffee filling the air, before long I was completely zoned it. It took the server refilling my coffee to realize a noise I assumed was merely the air conditioning or a brew station was my phone, vibrating to inform that a new message had been received.

As I reached down to check my phone, the display changed to show an unknown number was now calling me. My hand paused for a moment, then continued until I had picked up the phone.

A burst of static filled my ear as I opened my mouth to speak. Nearly dropping my phone in response to the sudden loud noise, I noticed a voice amongst all the static.

"...s-save her."

I heard the voice say.

"Save who? Is this a prank call?" I replied.

Again the sound of static came through, and then the voice came back.

"It's not too l... you c-can..."

Perhaps some movie being filmed and they accidentally dialed my number?

"I'm afraid I don't understand, who’s this?"

I asked after a moment, but as soon as I finished speaking the call ended.

"I'm sure she would find it hilarious after I tell her about this, maybe she had something to do with it."

I thought to myself.

The bizarre event taking up most of my thoughts, I completely forgot that I even got a text message from that unknown number before the call.

Opening the message up, all hopes of figuring out any more of the mystery were lost, as all of the text in it was incomprehensible.

Closing out the message, I debated on what to do now. I still hadn't heard back from her, who should have been on her way by now.

"Maybe she's getting it removed so I can actually eat it?"

The image of her coming through the door of the cafe on a gurney holding her pancreas on a plate came into mind and immediately I banished that thought.

I went back to the message, and my finger hovered over the call button. I knew she'd probably be happy to hear my voice, but part of me still hesitated. Deciding that she'd have a good reason for being a little late, I put my phone down and continued reading the book.

After spending a bit longer trying to understand the book I had picked up, I packed it away. Looking outside, I noticed the sun had set.

I tried giving her a call, but no answer.

"She'll have a good reason for it, she wouldn't just not show up"

I told myself.

I left the cafe and headed home, wondering what could have been the reason she didn't show. Thinking of each reason, some of what I had read earlier started to click. I laughed to myself, and my multiverse of stress melted away. I turned onto my street, and I walked inside.

My mom greeted me, and asked about dinner. I started to answer back, until I heard what the TV was saying.

Something about police being called, and close by too. That's when I found out the truth of why she never showed up.

"It can't be true… This can't be real..."

Those words kept repeating in my head as I watched the news.

At first I didn't want to believe it, that maybe it wasn't her but someone with the same name. But it was her picture that came up on the screen, and that erased any doubts I had left, and crumbled the little strength I had.

The reporter announced.

“This afternoon, on the streets of Kitakura district, a girl who goes to a local high school, named Sakura Yamauchi, age 17, was found collapsed on a road with a stab wound to the chest. She was found unconscious and in critical condition and according to witnesses was urgently transported to a hospital, but was confirmed dead soon after. The perpetrator who fled the scene, was apprehended and has already made a confession. The police are still investigating and collecting eye witness accounts…”

I head up to my room, slipping on the stairs. I barely remember closing my door, or when I ended up on my bed.

As I laid there in shock, unable to process the news, the only thought that stayed with me now was:

"I wish I could have saved her"

After what felt like hours, I finally fell asleep.