It's up to you.

Foreword.

I will keep the sighs to myself so as not to give myself away, because when I look at him, an instinct to possess him takes over my mind, and my mind seems to transform into a cheese full of holes; his messy red hair and amber eyes bring me back to the real world, because he is my fantasy, my downfall and my religion...

And although it is difficult for me to accept it, I will regret all my life being a loser who did not know how to value you, no matter how many stars I see on a dark night, I feel lost and falling into a deep abyss if I do not look at you even for a moment,

¿Am I being selfish by wanting to be your favorite? ¿Can I be the only one in your eyes?...

Because the silence between the two feels like a mortal and distant cold that burns and hurts, knowing that,  I have you and I don't have you, that I love you and I can't and don't know how to express it...

And although I don't want you to leave, maybe it's because 30 centimeters are too big for you and you think you can't handle it; or ¿could it be that my memory in your memory has vanished? ¿How do you ask me not to love you, if all your youth is captured in my heart? ¿How do I tell time to stop so I don't lose you?...

Maybe I should accept that there is someone else who takes my place in your bed, in your soul and in your heart, but if one day you feel sorrow and sadness, I ask you to remember that I have kissed a flower that would kill me with its poison and its thorns.

 …I would only ask you at this moment…

¿How are you doing  honey?...