I stared into her eyes looking for some kind of sign she was messing around. Her eyes glazed over with fear of my reaction. I saw my own face through her eyes. My throat closed up and my lungs stumbled for breath. How could this happen? Was it my fault? Of course, it was. I felt my life slip through my fingers like the water from a stream. She was all I had, she was all I was. I watched her walk away and the sky started falling down cutting into me the like the blades I had long since put down since high school. The next thing I knew I was in a bathtub my clothes still on weighing me down. The water was an awful pink and I looked at my hand seeing a broken whiskey bottle. I let my arm fall to the water and felt my new cuts on my arms sting. I felt as broken as the glass in the tub now stained pink.
My eyes stung as I slowly opened them.Feeling light headed I stumbled out of bed my three-day-old clothing seeming to weigh me down. I looked in the bathroom mirror hating what looked back at me. Where did I turn down such an empty sad path? My eyes seemed to be hollow and my facial hair seemed to be more alive than I felt. I let my eyes fall to my dirty clothing and I sighed speaking to myself with a voice even rougher than it usually is. “God Charlie you really let yourself go this time.” I decided I would go out to the only place I enjoy now.
As I walked into the small cafe I was hit with the smell of fake leather and coffee. This place was fairly new and since everything in it was new everything still smelt clean. I sat in a small booth connected to a table and looked around at the other people that sat at the other tables. A few people sat on their computers others watched the stage as a band performed. I looked up as a thin old woman came up to me smiling at me a smile that reached her eyes. “Charlie my boy,you’re back.” I smiled at her and chuckled softly “Yep. Sorry, I haven’t been coming lately. Life blew up in my face and I’m still hearing the ringing in my ears.” She sat down and looked at me a serious but loving expression on her face. “Wanna talk about it, hun?” I sighed looking down at my hands that rested in my lap. “No. No need to worry about it.” She stood up again nodding, she knew me long enough to know that I wouldn’t budge. “So what can I get you?” I thought for a minute looking at the small menu that sat in the corner of the table. “Why not a slice of cheesecake and my usual coffee.” She nodded and walked off and my attention went from her to the stage. A middle-aged man sat on a small stool in front of a keyboard and played a soft upbeat melody. His eyes flickered from the tables we sat to the keys he pressed. I listened to him until my coffee arrived. The smell hit my nose and I sighed in happiness. This place reminded me of my grandparent's house. So warm and small yet filled with life and the smell of coffee. I thanked the old woman whose name was Mary and she smiled at me and went to serve the other tables. I took a sip of my coffee feeling the warm drink fill my stomach making me feel sleepy. My eyes fell on a man that sat at the table in the corner. He was sketching things around him and his tired worn out eyes went from the cake in front of him to his sketchpad. Remembering my cheesecake I looked down at the small cake. Is it a cake? Or a pie? I took a bite of it and thought about it. I would google it later if I would remember. I sat eating and sipping on my coffee for a long while tuning out the world around me. My thoughts went to things I needed to do at home, to my deadbeat mother, to even HER. As I was staring into my coffee I heard something that made me freeze. A soft sad tune accompanied by a shy but smooth voice. I looked up to see a boy...er guy, around my age maybe two or three years younger standing in front of a microphone playing a ukulele. His eyes were closed and his words came out with so much emotion that it made my heart stop. He seemed to live through every word he sung. He seemed unaware of the crowd but I couldn’t take my eyes off of him. Then the song ended all too quickly and I sucked in a breath as he opened his eyes. They were a rich green and seemed to sparkle as he took in the small crowd his eyes only landing on me for a second. I felt my heart hammer in my chest a feeling I hadn’t felt since high school. As he made his way off the stage I swore I saw his deep green eyes meet mine for a minute. I sat gaping like a fool.