As I came to, fuzziness still clouded my mind. All I knew was my airways are tight, almost to the point where I can't breath. I tilted my head slightly to the right only to see vibrant red blood seep out of my side onto the floor. The cold hard cement was uncomfortable to lie on, but with no energy I just let it be. As the seconds ticked by slower and slower each second, I waited for my time to come. For death's sweet embrace to rescue me from this unbearable world. I thought surely a bullet to the rib cage would kill me instantly. I obviously didn't know beforehand that it was not that simple. All I knew was that living another day was to unbearable. Almost as unbearable as the pain.
For me, life was a prison sentence. Living in a jail cell with no escape, stuck forever between metal bars. Why had I been sentenced to living on in this horrible world? The moment that, that thought had come to my head the trepidation set in.
The fear of death was thick in my mind, it felt like being struck with a thousand lightning bolts.
For I had made a mistake, a mistake bigger than anything else I had done before.
I had tried to kill myself when I still a purpose to live…
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