Finding The Truth

Wailing sounds meet my ears as it rises and descends slowly, reminding me of my heartbeat. I try to figure out the sound as I become aware of my surroundings.

Sirens?…

    It fills my ears like heavy thoughts beating against my brain…

 I try not to close my eyes but all I could think about is how heavy they feel. Blue and red lights flash in the distance as I reach for my head. My body starts to ache like thorns piercing my skin. The blood drips from my head into my eyes as my body goes numb, it feels like sitting in poison rain not being able to move. All I wanted was to be home. 

Home…Funny how I want to go back to the place I ran from. 

My eyes start to flutter as everything starts to go dark. I wish I could just go back…

…….

“Ezekiel Emerson seriously get your legs off my table,” she demanded. A woman stands in the kitchen looking over at her son. That same son she raised since he was a child, only she didn't know she would lose that child in a matter of minutes. 

“Sorry mom,” I let out a deep breath as I took my feet off the table getting up to help my mom in the kitchen. Only to be met with flour being thrown at me.

“Mom?” I look at her annoyed while putting my hair into a ponytail trying to get it out of my eyes. It fell against my back, warming up my dark skin protecting it from the chaos, and washing my face.

“Your fault for not helping me in the first place now go get the rest of the family for dinner.” 

I sigh leaving the kitchen and going to the bottom of the stairs yelling, “DINNER’S READY!” 

I could hear my mom shout from the kitchen “I could have done that” as I walked to the table.

Multiple footsteps could be heard coming down the stairs as I sat down. Soon my siblings start to gather at the table with me, all 5 of them taking their usual seats as my mom brings out the food. 

Yes I have 5 siblings. 4 girls and 1boy. They literally get on my nerves. My brother isn’t really around a lot, so it’s mostly just me and my sisters playing a game of who can annoy each other the most. Obviously I win every time. 

“Hey! No eating yet we have to say grace,” my mom said, sending glares to all of us.

“Okay okay, y’all guys heard her. Show a little manners.” If glares could kill, my brother would be dead, with the glare I’m sending him. 

He’s always acting like he’s better than everyone one, but only I know that he actually had dropped out of college behind mom's back, and is now staying with a friend of his. I’m just waiting for the perfect time to use it against him when he tries to get me in trouble.

After grace Jace, my brother, decides to speak up again, “So Ezekiel.”

“We both know I go by Ezek, not Ezekiel.” Ezekiel was the name my father gave me after he left my mother. 

Once my little sister Rhea was born, who’s the 3rd to youngest, he’d decided he wanted to follow his dream career, and we’d just get in the way of that, so he left. I think it hurt mom and Jace the most since they’ve known him longer then us, but it still doesn’t give Jace the right to act like an asshole.

“Yea okay Ezekiel anyways, who was that guy I saw you with outside the school yesterday, y’all seemed…close.” My head shot up looking directly at him. It felt like my heart stopped when I heard him say those words. 

Yesterday was the first time I got to talk to my crush, Alexander, after years of pining over him. He was the guy that made me realize, that all my life I’ve been so far in the closet to even notice I was gay. And now I’m about to get outed by my whole family because of my stupid brother.

“He’s no one,” I said clearly lying.

“He didn’t seem like a no one,” he shot back.

“Just leave it alone,” I looked up to see my sister, Raven, was the one who spoke. I send her a small smile after she sends one back. My sister may not know everything that goes on with me, but it never stopped her from always having my back. 

“I don’t know, I think I wanna know about this guy,” my mom said looking from Raven to me. At that moment I felt all the pressure on me. Like if I didn’t say something now, Jace definitely would, and I definitely don’t want that.

“Mom”

“I’m gay”