My life is kind of shit. I hate the body I was born in. It never felt right for me. Nobody understood why. I told my closest friend and he turned his back on me and told me I was sick in the head. I just can’t anymore. I can’t go on. Life has no meaning to me. 

So… I decided… to end it…

….

Huh I - I didn’t die? I can breath? What is happening? 

“Hello there troubled soul.”

A deep male voice said to me.

I slowly opened my eyes. I was floating in the air. A man stood before me. Kind of tall. Dark hair with blue streaks. And horns on his head?

“Tell me why did you end your life?”

The man spoke.

I was speechless. I must be dreaming or hallucinating. But I guess it’s only polite to answer.

“Because I hate myself.”

A short pause from both of us but then the man spoke.

“I see. So what would have to change for you to not hate yourself anymore?”

What would have to change? What a stupid question. Fuck it. I’ll just go ahead and say it. I literally have nothing to lose at this point.

“If I became a girl…. I wouldn’t hate myself anymore. An easy fix right?”

I chuckled. Sure an easy fix. Bullshit. This is all stupid. Why did I even say it out loud. Where am I anyway. What is this weird place?

“I see.”

The man came closer to me. Touched my hand and said.

“Lets see what we can do about that.”

He smiled softly. The space that we were in started to change. It began to take shape. Walls formed around us. A carpet on the floor. Stairs leading to a throne. 

I sat on the floor still a little confused but kind of okay with what was happening. Well I mean I have nothing to lose. I already tried to end my life. What could be worse than that. 

The man left for a second but than came right back with a small knife in his hand. Before I could say a word he took the knife to his wrist and cut himself.

“What the hell are you doing?”

I let out a little cry. I mean the dude just hurt himself right in front of me. Who does that.

I tried to stand up. But the man’s hand  touched my shoulder and pined me to the ground again. He put his bloody wrist to my mouth.

“Drink it.”

He said like it was nothing. What kind of crazy shit is this? What does he mean by drink it?

I tried to say something but I couldn’t. It was like I was controlled or something. 

My lips slowly touched the blood on the man’s wrist. It filled my mouth. It was warm. I slowly swallowed. 

“Good now close your eyes.”

The man’s words echoed through the room. I did as he said. I closed my eyes and waited. The man put his hands on my shoulders. And said.

“Now imagine what you’d like to look. Who you’d like to be. The you that will make you want to live.”

The me that will make me want to live? Well I want to be a girl obviously. I have blond hair and blue eyes now and I wouldn’t mind keeping that about myself. I just wish my hair would be a bit longer. As far as my body type goes I don’t really care. As long as my body is female.

I don’t know what he meant by imagining what I want to look like. I mean that’s a pretty hard thing to do. Was that description good enough?

Suddenly I felt warmth all over my body. My hair grew longer in seconds. My body started to change shape. When I opened my eyes and looked down at my body…. It was… female? And I had a simple white dress on? No way this is actually happening.

The man let my shoulders go and took a step back.

“The spell is finished now you can restart your life.”

He smiled gently. Can I really do that though? Go back to my old world like nothing happened? Look the same people in the eyes and pretend like we don’t know each other? No way!

“I can’t go back… I hate that place! I don’t want to go back!”

Huh my voice? It’s so high… 

My eyes begone to water. A tear fell down my face.

“Please don’t make me go back there…”

I pleated. I want a fresh start in this new body. I don’t ever wanna see the faces of the people who made me hate myself even more than I already did.

The man sighed and looked my way.

“There is no need to go back there. You have many options. for example you can stay here for the time being and decide where you want to go. Or you can start a new life right away in a different world. It’s all up to you.”

He smiled gently.

I can chose? I have no idea what to do… this is all so surreal…

The man came a little closer. I looked at his face. It somehow looked off… 

“I - I need to tell you something first though… the spell I used to make you female. It’s not … permanent…”

It’s like the world turned upside down.

“What do you mean it’s not permanent? I’m going to turn back again? It’s only temporary?”

“Listen it will last for a month. After that for the duration of a full moon you will turn back to your old form. It’s so that the spell has time to recharge. After the full moon passes you will be back to this new form…”

I stood up. This is bullshit! This guy gives me hope of a new life and then tells me this? No way! No way no way no way! I am out of here. I do not want to hear another word from him.

I jolted for the exit. The man didn’t seem to care. He just let me go without a fight. Kind of stupid if you ask me..

The demon that just turned our protagonist into a pretty girl stood in the room. He broke the silence.

“Grace?”

“Yes Nova?”

A girl with black hair in a bun appeared out of the shadows of the room.

“Please go and look after that one.”

“But of course. You know you could have at least told her where she is. How do you think she will react?”

“Well I guess you’ll find that out yourself.”

Grace giggled a little and went on her way.

The man just stood there and said to himself.

“Damn I thought working with humans would be easier.”