It’s hard being me.

I’m not saying that in a piteous way as if I’m telling everyone “Oh please! I need support! My life sucks!” No. I really do mean that it’s hard being me. You try nearly surviving an explosion just to become a cyborg. Yeah. And that’s only a sliver.

But first, let me tell you what the other Isaacs would describe themselves as since I am very much like them. My name is Isaac Detisinki, a sixteen-year-old man with blue hair and (Usually) brown eyes. My eyes change depending on how I feel, but otherwise, they stay the same. I am five-foot-four and usually wear a blue turtleneck with jeans and black shoes. That’s…. it. That’s the basics.

There’s only one thing that’s a little bit different.

I remember everything.

And I mean EVERYTHING. Timelines, universes, successes… mistakes… everything. Mostly the mistakes. They hurt… a lot. Mentally, emotionally, and physically. Every horrible mistake creates another scar. And the worst ones…

They start rusting me from the inside out. The first was when I… when I…. fuck it’s so hard…. The first of the two worst mistakes I’ve ever made was when I killed my sis. We were fighting off an assailant, and I was ready to kill the son of a bitch. But he moved out of the way with Jenny right behind him… and… fuck, I’m sorry Jenny… I didn’t mean to kill you… I wanted to end our endless fight with this monster… I didn’t want you to die…. I’m sorry! I wish I could turn back the time and save you! I wish I could take it back! I’M SORRY JENNY!!!

I’m so…… so……. sorry….

I miss you…

Heh, sorry about that… happens whenever I think of it…. Anyways, the second one is when I gave the love of my life so much hope and love…. And then I ripped her heart and went off with another girl… in this universe, we’re as happy as our… unique qualities… will allow us to be. Still… the very first time I was created… I told her I loved her and then… I kissed her… It felt great… but something inside me told me I could do better…

Heh… I failed to ignore that thought. Suddenly… I left her… scarring her forever… I think she’s forgiven me, mostly, but… all of her incarnations have a new saying….

“A Goddess can love…. But can never be loved…”

I gave her the feeling… the emotional torture… the experience… everything she needed to think that the saying had truth to it… I just… I wish I could take it all back… fix her… and then she wouldn’t be so upset… she wouldn’t have to feel this...

Through my past mistakes… through everything, I’ve done… I’ve become the one Isaac that remembers everything us Isaacs have done. I am Regret!Isaac.

And it’s hard being me.