My vision is fading… there’s doctors all around me, but I asked for help too late, so now not only am I going to die, I’m going to die, but in a stupidly embarrassing way as well… I don’t want to die like this. I’m too young, I haven’t even done anything yet. I have so many stories left to tell, things left to learn, and people to meet, and I'm dying? I’ve done nothing with my life and now I’m dying? How pathetic…
I’m useless, I’m dumb, I can’t ask for help, I can’t do anything on my own, and I’m pathetic. Now I’m going to die like that. It’s so fitting for me I hate it. I don’t want to die like this, I don’t want to be so awful, I don’t want to hate myself, I want to actually achieve something, before I die. I just don’t want to die.
I don’t want to die… I don’t want to die… I don’t want to die…
The pain fades away as my consciousness recedes into darkness.
I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die.
I can’t hear any of the doctors anymore. I’m comfortable…
I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die! I don’t want to die!
My life flashes before my eyes and then…
I DON’T WANT TO DIE!
All my senses pick up nothing. I try to reach for any memories within my head. Nothing.
How long have I been here? A second? A year? An eternity? I don’t know. There’s no way to tell.
Somewhere, a point of light begins glowing ever so faintly. I have no body, no face, no eyes, yet I face it anyway. It starts glowing brighter, and I begin to feel again.
Does it take seconds, or does it take millenia? I can’t tell. But slowly my memories return to me. I become aware of my body returning to me. My legs, my arms, my torso, my breasts, my head, they all return to me as I reach out towards that light as if it’s the most important thing in the world.
In this void I can’t tell if I’m facing up, down, forwards, or backwards. My only reference is the light. My only directions are towards and away from the light. My senses have returned to me, but other than my eyes picking up that light I can sense nothing. I don’t feel anything around my body, there is no taste in my mouth, no smells flowing through my nose, no sound I can pick up. I continue to reach towards that light as much as I can, but I cannot stand.
Eventually, I see the light coming towards me. What was once so faint it could barely be picked up, is now almost blinding. I see all sorts of different blue rays of light go past me, and I can feel wind blowing from the direction of the light. The darkness begins to fade away.
I reach even harder as the light encompasses my entire view. I have to close my eyes, but I will not stop reaching towards it. I can hear the wind blowing through my ears, and I can hear a long and high pitched chiiing sound as my entire body is encompassed by warmth. For the first time in what could have been seconds or what could have been eternities, I remember who I am.
All of this eventually ceases, but my eyes remain closed. I’m thirsty, like the feeling of waking up in the middle of night because you desperately need something to drink. Other than that, I can’t stop thinking about how awful I feel. I feel like I only got an hour of sleep in one night, and I have a splitting headache. Focusing on the things around me, I can tell that I’m laying on a stone floor, with absolutely no clothes.
Before I can even question what I’m doing here, instead of on a hospital bed, I hear a bunch of male sounding voices all around me. I don’t understand a word that they’re saying but that doesn’t register right now.
I quickly open my eyes and sit up, and see what’s around a dozen or a dozen and a half old men in robes all around me, while I’m laying here with absolutely nothing on.
“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH GET AWAY GET AWAY GET AWAY!”
I wipe my eyes with the blanket that the men left behind. Wow, I actually cried. They all left, and they tried to be as quiet as possible, so they probably weren’t trying to do anything to my body. I probably just got the wrong idea and panicked.
I’m calm now, so I need to focus on what happened. I organize all the latest events into a list.
Dying in the hospital
Being semi-conscious with that weird light.
Wake up on stone, naked and surrounded by men.
All the men leave, leaving me a blanket to cover myself in.
What even was that weird light? I never experienced anything like it before. Maybe I would have seen something like that if I was on an acid trip, but that couldn’t have happened. It might have just been a dream.
Let’s see, given just how much I was freaking out, I doubt they’ll be coming back here any time soon, so I’ll look around the room for any clues as to where I am. As I get up, I wrap the blanket around me like a towel.
Upon further observation, I realize the room is completely made out of stone bricks, and has no windows. Four massive stone pillars in four corners of the room keep the ceiling propped up, and there is only one wooden door. That’s the only entrance or exit I can see, and it’s currently closed.
I holed up in one of the corners, so the massive pillar blocked my sight of most of the room. When I walk around it though, I see a huge circle on the floor drawn in what appears to be some sort of chalk.
Referring to it as just a circle is a bit of an understatement. It’s around 10 meters in diameter, and it’s design is ridiculously complex.There’s all sorts of shapes within the circle and writing in a language I don’t understand everywhere. There’s all sorts of strange symbols as well. Some of which I recognize, most of which I don’t. It’s like drawing something as small as you possibly can, but over a circle 10 meters in diameter.
This must have taken weeks, probably even months to complete, even with a dozen artists all working together. I draw as a hobby, but I’ve never drawn something even close to how amazing this circle is… This is the biggest thing I’ve ever seen that has such tiny detail. I want nothing more than to look over all of its details.
This is the center of the room right, and I woke up in the center of the room… Who the hell put me on this!? Why would you even consider putting a stupid sack of flesh on something so beautiful!? I need to see if I can watch something like this being made. I also need to see if I can yell at whoever risked smudging any of this by putting me here.
“I’m coming in! I’m alone!” While I’m in the middle of admiring this circle’s beauty, I can hear a female voice from the other side of the one door. No! Go away!
The owner of the voice doesn’t listen to me, and comes in anyway. She’s a thin, tall woman, with a small waist and even smaller boobs. She’s blonde and dressed in fantasy looking green clothing.
Ahh… focus on her clothes instead! I can’t let myself get too out of control, or else she’s going to figure out just how much of a disgusting person I am, and I can’t have that! I’ll cry if someone right in front of me figures that out!
Just think about her clothes. They are really interesting, even if it’s way too much green for my liking. It’s a bit hard to remember since I was freaking out, but I think all the men I was surrounded by were also wearing fantasy looking robes as well.
“My name is Cherilyn. Are you OK?”
I start panicking again. Oh God, I’m not used to any social interaction that isn’t behind a computer screen. Oh God, what do I say? What was the question, again!? Oh no, oh no.
“Are you OK?”
Phew… thank God she repeated her question… But she obviously isn’t just going to leave now. Oh, God, I can feel the stress all over my body. I almost prefer the panic from earlier than the stress eating away at me now…
“I’m sure that must have been really scary for you. I’ve brought you a change of clothes.” Cherilyn pulls out some more fantasy looking green clothes out of nowhere.
“If you’d rather be dressed while we talk, I’ll leave for a bit.”
Oh my God yes, please leave. I don’t want to be talking to you. But how do I get that across without being rude? Oh no… The silence is getting awkward… What do I say, what do I say? I can feel my heart beating in my chest, what the hell do I say!?
“I’m just going to give you a few minutes to get changed. I’ll be waiting outside, just knock on the door when you’re ready, OK?” With that, Cherilyn begins leaving. Oh thank God. There’s no relief, I’m still stressed, I can still hear my heart beating, oh God, I’m about to start crying again. Calm down! It’s OK! She already left.
I start breathing in and out as slowly as possible. I do that for a good 30 seconds before I finally get a hold of myself. Good God, I don’t want to talk to anybody ever again. But I’m going to have to… I hate this so much, why can’t I just be normal?
I want to avoid going into a depressive state, so I need to think about something else. My crippling social anxiety? Being a creepy, disgusting person right down at my core? Suppress those thoughts and think of something else. Come on, I’ve done this plenty of times, I should be able to do it here, even if I am much more stressed.
I don’t know where I am or why I’m here. Can I even trust Cherilyn? She probably isn’t expecting me to take 10 minutes to put some clothes on so I’ll do that first. I start to pick up the clothes that she left behind. I honestly think that they’re ugly, but they’ll just have to do.
I pull the bra out, and… This bra is way too small. My boobs aren’t even that big, it’s just that the bra is tiny. Honestly, my boobs are hurting just thinking about putting this thing on. Picking up all the other clothes she left me, my worries are made more legitimate.
The top is long enough to pass for a dress on me (albeit an alluringly short dress), the pants are too long, and too tight around the waist, and the panties have the same problem as the bra. I guess I could try and go without underwear, but I don’t have nearly enough confidence for that. I’d like to, but I’d die of embarrassment the second I step outside.
Hey, hey, I’m not supposed to be thinking about that side of me, remember? Just pretend I’m normal for a bit longer, and keep myself suppressed. Remember, Cherilyn is my only lifeline here, I can’t let her know I’m getting excited just from her clothes, she’d have every right to look at me like trash and throw me out on the street.
Yep, just move on. Now I’ll have to ask Cherilyn for something else to wear. I have to ask Cherilyn for something to wear. I have to ask Cherilyn for something. I have to talk with Cherilyn. While I’m still not dressed. Uh… Oh God the stress is getting to me again… No, no, it’s fine… just walk up and say the clothes don’t fit… that’s all you have to say. It’s all you have to do so just do it.
I walk up to the door slowly. I can feel my heart beating in my chest. Come on there’s nothing wrong with saying this, just do it. I get to just in front of the door, and the feeling of stress reaches its zenith. Just say it!
“Cherilyn… your clothes don’t fit me.”
“Really? Well you are quite a bit shorter than me… I’ll go and get something smaller. I’ll lock the door so just wait here.”
After that I can hear the door locking and Cherilyn hurrying away. I breathe out a sigh of relief, and the stress dissipates. What replaces it is a feeling of exhilaration, similar to getting off of a good roller coaster or finishing a really hard level in a video game. Wow, I actually initiated a conversation. Aha! I feel amazing!
Woo, I’m in a good mood now, so let’s try my best to figure out why I’m here. Cherilyn didn’t check any of my sizes, so it should be a while before she gets back here. There doesn’t appear to be any clues in here other than the circle, so I should probably start thinking about what happened before that.
Let’s see, I was in the hospital because of… that. It feels like I really died there. That was the most pain I was ever in in my entire life, and I should have been beyond saving given that I didn’t ask for any help. Nobody even knew anything was wrong until I collapsed and couldn’t get up. So why am I alive?
I really want to discount the possibility that I somehow survived, but I’m clearly not dead. Maybe it’s something to do with that light? No, I’ve concluded that it was just a dream. I’ll keep assuming that until something else comes along to disprove that conclusion.
Moving on, the very next thing I was aware of, was being naked in this room surrounded by men. They sounded all excited when I was first waking up, but after I freaked out they all left. I also couldn’t understand a word they were saying.
I didn’t recognize the language. They all looked European, so I’m either in North America or Europe. They weren’t speaking Spanish or French, I know that much. I don’t speak either of those languages, but I feel like I would have recognized them at least. It sounded vaguely German but not quite. Maybe some eastern European language? They didn’t sound slavic though. Then again, would I really be able to recognize what sounds slavic? Probably not.
Cherilyn spoke English though. As such, she’s my only source of any useful information. Whether I like it or not, I’ll just have to go along with whatever she says, and listen & think carefully. I’ve kind of settled on eastern Europe being the main possibility as to where I am. How I got here from America, I don’t have the faintest clue.
What if I’m not in eastern Europe, though? What if my instincts are right and I actually died in the hospital? I don’t know how I possibly could have survived that though. Let’s think for a moment. I woke up completely naked, surrounded by men who I didn’t understand and appeared to be celebrating.
Is it possible that I actually died there though? How am I alive, then? An illusion created by being so close to death? Reincarnation? Having my memories implanted into an artificial body?
Illusion is unlikely. I don’t think the panic I felt back there can be generated by an illusion, and I feel aware of all my surroundings. Just to make sure, I check to make sure I have ten fingers. I do. To make extra sure, I punch the wall really hard. Yeah, no way any illusion can fake this kind of pain.
Reincarnation also seems ridiculous. There’s no scientific basis for a thing like that, so I can’t help but find it hard to believe. What if I was summoned for some reason? Maybe the circle in the center of the room had something to do with it? Along with the light? That would explain the fantasy clothes everywhere… No, I’m considering the possibility of magic. I don’t want to consider that unless I see it with my own eyes.
My memories being implanted into an artificial body seems the most likely of the three. If this is actually the far future, I have to consider that they’d have technology I can’t hope to understand. Nothing really seems wrong with my body, though.