Winter was never really sure about what Winter was.
Was Winter a she? A he? A they? An it? A unicorn? A tree?
Winter’s parents always called Winter a she. They always dressed Winter up in pretty dresses to go to church. They always told Winter to learn to cook and clean, since that was the duty of a woman.
To Winter’s playmates, kids around the same age as Winter, it seemed not to matter as much. Winter could be a unicorn or a prince, if Winter so wished.
However, when Winter came home again, Winter was back to being a ‘she’. If Winter claimed to be a prince, Winter’s parents would laugh for a while, and with a whispering and kind voice tell Winter to enjoy playing while ‘she’ could.
Winter would do as ‘she’ was told, and act accordingly.
But as Winter grew older, the burdens of being a ‘she’ just didn’t seem to match well with how Winter perceived the world. Winter grew more and more attached to be looked at as a prince, or at the very least, a ‘he’.
Winter started to make two Winter’s. A ‘she’ at home and a ‘he’ when with playmates and schoolfriends.
As such, Winter had obtained a little bit of happiness, but an even bigger amount of confusion, because how come, that Winter’s parents, the people who seemed to know everything, wasn’t able to see that Winter really was a ‘he’?
Winter desperately wanted to tell how ‘he’ was a ‘he’.
But… As Winter grew older and learned more about the religion ‘he’ had grown up in, he figured out that ‘he’ would never be able to tell ‘his’ parents the truth. That there was something wrong with ‘him’.
In fear of ‘his’ friends telling ‘his’ parents, ‘he’ started to act more and more as a lady. As what ‘he’ knew ‘his’ parents wanted. This along with ‘his’ body starting to change was horrifying to him…
But in the end, he was a boy at heart. Even if the world told him he was a girl, he would stand up and shout it was wrong. As long as his parents wouldn’t hear it, that was.
Winter managed to find outlets and places where he could be himself. He dressed like a boy, wore wigs, bound his chest, learned to talk with a deep voice, and felt more and more comfortable in his made-up boy-body. He even got friends, who saw him as he saw himself. -As one of the guys.
Sadly, good things doesn’t last forever. Secrets always finds their way out to the people you want to know the least.
As such, Winter’s parents one day told him they knew. That they could help ‘her’. That they could change ‘her’ ‘She’ just had to let them.
Winter knew he didn’t want to change. That he wasn’t wrong. Because the feeling he got when he was seen as a ‘he’ made him the happiest in the world. So the very day after, Winter had packed his most necessary things, and had run away from home.
Ready to start a new secret.