Peeking out from behind a tree, I scanned the area. The coast was clear. A couple of metres from where I squatted, I spot my silver two-door jeep. Closest to the exit, with the shady coverage of the bushes overhead. The perfect getaway location for the occasional wag.
“Target has been spotted!” I said, making binoculars out of my hands.
“Is the coast clear, Captain?” Max asked, squatting close behind me.
With another quick glance across the empty campus, I shook my head.
“No enemies sighted,” I respond, though I poke my head out again, just to check.
“Southside also clear!” she assured.
“Alright then, Co-Captain,” I said. “Let’s roll out!”
We dashed over to the nearby fence, ready to jump over it. That is until I spotted Mr Palmer (our Guidance Counsellor) coming back from the parking lot.
“Oh SHI-” We both dropped to the ground and quickly hid behind a nearby bush.
Mr Palmer was the kind of man who wore a vest no matter what season it was. To be honest, he’s a nice guy, buttttt Max and I tend to press his button one too many times.
As he came closer, Max and I shuffled further back in the bush, hoping that our combined mental waves would somehow push Mr Palmer the other way. When he stopped suddenly, my faith in the world evaporated as I prepared for yet another ass kicking from the Shaved Coconut.
“Mr Hayes, what are you doing out here?”
Just as I prayed for my dear mother in heaven to spare my sorry ass, I realised that his question wasn’t directed towards Max and I.
“Mr Hayes, I’m sure you’re aware, but this is an out of bounds area.”
From the corner of my view, another student I didn’t recognise stepped forward.
Just from appearance, I wouldn’t think he was a student at our school - heck he had a beanie, loose bits of hair and all. If it weren’t for the fact he was wearing the same uniform I was; a white short-sleeve button up paired with a matching navy tie and shorts, I could have assumed he was some random punk.
And where the heck did he even come from!?
I just hoped he didn’t see us – and if he did, that he didn’t rat us out.
“Oh, sorry, I didn’t realise,” The stranger punk apologised. “I was just looking around the school, trying to learn where the classes are.”
“I understand but maybe next time, stick with the map.”
So he’s new? How gutsy to sneak off on the first day. Props to you, Beanie-Punk.
“What’s happening?” Max whispered beside me. The bush rustled slightly as she pushed herself up to try and get a better view.
I gripped her arm tightly as I watched Mr Palmer suddenly turn and place his attention towards our direction.
“Shh!” I shushed at her. Turning back, I prayed that the bush was stronger than Mr Palmer’s ‘student detector’ glare.
“Actually, Mr Palmer, I was wondering if you could help me find my next class.”
The Beanie-Punk drew back the Counsellor’s focus, saving us yet again.
“Of course!” At the sound of a student in need, Mr Palmer immediately switches to his ‘Helpful Guardian’ mode. “What’s your next class?”
“Uh, I’m not sure.”
The New-Kid Beanie-Punk pulled a piece of paper out of his pockets, unfolded and held it out to Mr Palmer. “I still don’t understand this timetable.”
“Really?” Mr Palmer took the paper off Beanie-Punk and inspected it. “It’s pretty simple to understand.”
“Y-Yeah, I’m just not used to the format,” he chuckled awkwardly.
“Ooh, he’s clumsy. How cute~” Max whispered to me, with a poke to my side.
I turned my head to see her peeking over the bush – not through it!
“Get down, what are you doing?!” I hissed. After the amount of times we have done this, you’d expect her to get this right!
“I couldn’t see crap! You were so quiet!!” she snapped hushedly.
I smacked my hand to her mouth and peeked through the bush - to see Mr Palmer looking over at us again.
Well, fuck a duck. I held my breath. He took a few steps towards us.
“Uh, Mr Palmer?”
Beanie-Punk, at our aid once more!
“Did you hear anything?” Mr Palmer asked him. Another step toward us. “I could've sworn I heard something.”
“No, I don’t think so.” As he said this though, he made eye contact with me through the bush. He lifted his hand in a pretend chin-scratch and made a subtle ‘shh’ sign by his lips.
I was surprised by that but smirked to myself. Note: This new kid is cool.
“Alright,” Mr Palmer said, with a smile and a pat on Beanie-Punk’s shoulder. “Let’s find that class of yours.”
“Sweet,” Beanie-Punk said with a similar smile. “Thanks, Teach.”
Luckily, I caught how Mr Palmer stole a final scan of the surroundings before he and the new kid finally went out of sight.
With our coast truly clear once again, I put my hand on my chest and gave a little cry.
“A true hero,” I sniffled.
“What?” Max questioned, confused.
“New kid has our back,” I whispered, patting my heart in his honour.
Once certain that they were gone from the premises, we got up and quickly jumped the fence and dashed over to my good-ol Jeep.
I started the jeep as soon as we got in, winding down the windows so we didn’t suffocate from the humid air. I felt pretty confident as we pulled out of the parking spot, but it seemed Mr Palmer wasn’t quite so easy to slip.
“WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU ARE DOING?!” We both jumped as Mr Palmer’s voice boomed from across the park, his footsteps rapidly closing in on us.
At this point, I could give up.
I could turn the ignition off, get out and accept Mr Palmer’s wrath and punishment now.
Or I could have some fun, make a cool getaway and accept his wrath and punishment tomorrow.
Either way, I was getting punished. Might as well make this all worth it.
“Fuck it!” I put the car into drive and throttled out of the parking lot, speeding away from the school like Vin Diesel.
Max screamed out a ‘WOOO!’ and laughed as we made our grand escape.
“Holy shit,” I sighed. “We are so fucked.”
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