Confession



July 12, 1976.

I was 19 when I was married to Stacy who was 17. As I grew up, I was, very fascinated by her British culture although I belonged to the Japanese culture.

I learned to speak English fluently, wear suits with grace, and developed impeccable etiquettes.

But Stacy grew up to be my complete opposite - homely, a typical housewife.

All my advice and admonishments couldn't change her basic personality - an obedient wife, a doting mother and a good homemaker. But she was not what I wanted.

More I tried to change her, and more we drifted apart. Gradually she metamorphosed from a cheerful, affectionate young girl into a quiet, insecure woman.

Meanwhile, I started getting attracted to a co-actor of mine who was all that I wanted in my wife. After ten years of marriage, l divorced Stacy, left my home and married my co-actor. I had ensured the financial security of Stacy and my kids.

For about 6-7 months everything went well. Then I started realizing my new wife was not caring and affectionate.

She was only concerned about her beauty, her ambitions, her wants, and desires.

Sometimes I missed Stacy's caring touch and concern for my welfare.

Life moved on.

September 23, 1984.

My new wife and I were two persons living in a house, not one soul living in a home. I never went back to find out what happened to Stacy and my kids.

After about 6 -7 years of my second marriage, I came across an article on a Kokan Miyoshi, an upcoming famous chef who had recently launched a book of her own recipes.

The moment I looked at the picture of the smart, elegant lady, I was stunned. It was Stacy. But how could it be ??? She had remarried and changed her maiden name too.

They told me that their new father knows the meaning of true love. He accepted Stacy as she was and never tried to change her into what he himself was because he loves her more than he loves himself.

He let her evolve at her own pace and never tried to force his wishes on her.

He accepted and enjoyed her person as it was and she has bloomed into a confident, loving, affectionate self-reliant lady today under her second husband's selfless love and acceptance.

Whereas my selfishness, demands, and unacceptance of her persona had crushed her and then in my selfishness, I had discarded her.

I Never Loved Her, I Had Always Loved Myself,

And Those Who Love Themselves, Cannot Love Others.

I shall always regret it.