My freshman year at Elk Grove University was nothing like I had imagined it would be. 

Growing up I was always a straight-A student but it didn't look like that would continue into my adult years. At the end of the Fall Term, my GPA was an astounding 2.3.

And my social life wasn't going any better. I hadn't a single friend four months into my year.  My roommate, Samantha, shared no interests. The only real socializing I did was occasionally call my friends, Ella and Sam. They were both attending University on the West Coast, so seeing them felt impossible. 

Everything had gone unexpected, so when Winter Break rolled around I skipped town as quickly as I could. I hopped in my Jeep and drove down the road to my father's house for Christmas break. It wasn't far from campus but it was just far enough out that it wasn't likely that I would run into anyone from Elk Grove that would recognize me. 

Since Sam and Ella would be coming back in Summer Break, I hadn't retained contact with anyone else from high school. So I had three weeks with nothing to do other than lounging around.

. . . 

“Hazel don't you have any new friends from school to hang out with? Your mother and-” I cut him off. “Stepmother. She's not my mother.” I protest. 

“Yes, your stepmother and I are growing concerned. You've been here for a week already and you've barely left your room, let alone the house.” My father says as he sits on the edge of my bed. “Listen Hazel I know this time of year is difficult for you. It's hard for me too…but it's been four years now-” 

“Stop Dad just stop,” I beg him not to continue. I've heard this speech several times since my mother passed. “I don’t wanna continue this conversation. Not this close to Christmas.” I look away from him in melancholy. I won’t say another word to him. 

My father lets out a long sigh before getting up and walking to the door. “Dinner will be ready shortly,” he says, leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

I wanna scream or cry but I can't find the energy even though I can feel the pain of it in my chest. I turn on my phone and pull up Sam’s contact starting a call. It rings three times before he picks up. 

“Hey Hazel, you called at the worst time i'm running late for my next Cupid date. I'll call you later!” He hangs up the phone before I can even get a word in.

I try calling Ella but she doesn't answer. I feel that pain in my chest again. I want to cry again, but I don’t. I just slip back under my covers and do the only thing I can; I sleep. 

…

I'm pulled from my slumber by the sound of my phone vibrating next to my pillow. I sleepily, feel around, till I find it. I answer the phone without looking at who's calling. I put the phone up to my ear, and I heard Ella’s voice on the other end of the line. “Hey girl, sorry I was at Todd’s when you called. What's up?” She says.

I sit up and rub my eyes. “Ugh, you too?” I groaned. 

She giggles, “Did you talk to Sam?” 

“Yea, how'd you know?” 

“He’s been on a date with a different girl every day this week. He’s been using some new dating app.”

“Yeah, he mentioned that. Do you think it works?” I ask half curious half cringing at myself for even considering using it.

“I mean I met Todd the old-fashioned way but a lot of the single girls on my floor have been talking about it. Finally ready to start dating?” She says teasingly. I stayed silent for a few minutes “Maybe…”