I'm drowning. I fall off a cliff and land in water. Or rather, I think it is. There are lights all around me - the sky above as well as the sea. The water is still. Nothing is moving. Deep in my heart I know how to swim. But is there a reason? This death would be wonderful - all surrounded by stars.
I hear voices. Who are they? I have no idea. I also don't know how I came to that cliff or wherever exactly I am. I don't know anything - and I still don't care. I'm soaking the view like my clothes the water. Slowly - but steadily - I'm starting to sink. I'm happy and smiling. The voices again.
"You can do it! Oh please stay with me!"
"Who are you?" I ask and wait for an answer.
It's silent. I'm completely under water and look at the sky. But suddenly - a hand. It's holding my own, so warm and so like a friend. My body get's pulled out way too fast. It's going up, up in the sky. The stars turn into stripes. How long will this trip last? It's going higher and higher - I'm near the moon. The light is so bright! I shut my eyes. When I open them again - the sky is gone.
I'm laying in a bed under a white roof. I'm looking around. A head is laying on my bed. A woman. She is holding my hand.
"Who are you?" I ask.
The head rushes up. She's looking surprised, tears streaming down her cheeks.
"Connor!" She tries to hug me, but I push her away. "I'm so, so glad that you--"
"Who are you?" I ask again. Her expression instantly changes from happy to depressed and sad. Did I do something wrong?
A doctor comes in the room."He is awake! Ma'am, why didn't you call us?"
She seems shocked and doesn't answer, still staring at me.
"Miss Martins? What's the matter?" A nurse gently touches her shoulder. The woman shrugs out of surprise and finally faces the nurse.
"He doesn't remember me..."
My life is pretty normal now. Apparently, my name is Connor Greens. The woman was my girlfriend Susan Martins. We are still living together. She said she wanted to help me get back my memories. I didn't lose all of them. I remember my coworkers, every contact of my job, even my dog, Jesslyn.
But the thing I remember the best is the sea of stars - the feeling of drowning.In my dreams I'm sitting at the edge of the cliff again, the view just as astonishing and beautiful. And for some reason, I just can't feel scared of falling. Sometimes I think about jumping again, but then I feel a presence next to me and I don't dare to move anymore.