Egg Lady Wedding Looks:

A. Resting bitchface due to the fact she knew she married the wrong man, but did it anyway to "prove a point" amongst other girlfriends and other deep-seated insecurities. The makeup was shit too as she went to MAC to "test" out a free makeover so she could save money.

B. Ill-fitting veil failing to cover bald spot due to flat, lifeless, brittle hair due to maltreatment and overdyeing with a badly matched box color.

C. 99 cent fake flower bouquet at some dollar store and arranged because wedding was uber-cheap. (Facebook and social media invites replaced the traditional invites and RSVPs. Made sure all were sent repeatedly to disinterested invitees.)

D. Boob crutches due to poorly made bras and just a bad body shape which was rendered unappealing to get "gordo" because apparently that's what latinos do according to her. (HINT: She is NOT latina.)

E. Ill-fitting Becky dress that shows off lumps, not curves. Acne everywhere due to her mismanaging her skin because in college she insisted she knew more than the dermatologist.

F. Piss boxed wine from the same dollar store in order to jam up a wedding with a minuscule budget.

G. The groom. Actually, a poor, random dude that ended up getting clubbed by her and who she married while he was dying of a head wound. She drags around this corpse to show that she's married!

Have your Egg Lady Wedding lookbook today!!!

#fake #makeup #wedding #demonbitch #MAC