TWO

My eyes quickly dropped to the floor with my hand flying across my eyes to cover them. I hummed a silent response trying to mask my embarrassment and hurt. So he's Jimin's boyfriend?

"Kook?" his voice asked me again.

Using the floor to direct me back to my room with my hands slightly covering my eyes I hummed a response. Gah could I embarrass myself any further this early...Ever?

I felt my embarrassment pulling me into an invisible shade, and the worst part of this, was not that he was waiting for my response. It was thinking of a plan on what to do in front of him after years and of the boy he was now apparently dating...Jimin...his name was the Jimin. I felt really really defeated and just turned back to nod him and what came out of my mouth next wasn't me I swear it

"Uhm hi, I see your boyfriend already told you about me. It's actually Jungkook." I walked nearer to him with an extended hand ready for a handshake. I noticed his eyes increase in size, I saw him shifting his leg weight one of his tells .......telling me he was uncomfortable.....He's always done that.

"Jungkook you don't remember me?" in a soundful whisper he asked and like a fire that had already been lit in a long dry forest I couldn't take it back nor could my mouth control the lie "No ,I'm sorry should I?" his eyes bored back into mine with hurt, disappointment and what I think was pleading. I didn't know what could I do now? Confirm that yes indeed I knew him and still remembered everything in the presence of his boyfriend who I drifted my eyes to look at and he was oblivious to the air that felt suffocating to, well at least me. However Tae's hand met mine shaking it briefly, his hand was warm probably from the friction with Jimin's body. Thinking about that felt wrong. So I tried to fake some confidence and asked " So you're Jimin's boyfriend right?" Jimin moved in closer to him and smiled brightly with happiness evidence in his bashful smile, Tae spoke up his voice void if any emotion I could read "Yea I am. You're my new roommate right?"

"Yes."

~~

"So are you still pretending you don't remember him?" Kat asked doing some finishing touches to her dreads.

 I readjusted my bed cover not that it needed any fixing but I needed something to distract me from the dread tied in my stomach it'd made a home in my stomach ever since I'd met Tae again. I'd been regretting pretending not to remember Tae and that was stupid, it made me feel stupid. And Kat, well Kat had become close to me in the past weeks as we had bonded over sports last weekend when I tried out for the bulldogs football team,her boyfriend was Ansel the team captain and I had a feeling she'd initially only befriended me to hear about and possibly run into V when she'd visit me in my dorm. She'd turned out to be nosy noticing and eventually confronting me about my crush on 'V'. Except it wasn't a crush ever since High School it'd become much more but she didn't need all those details and it had been hurting seeing him canoodling with someone else. And now I had myself to try digging myself out of the mess I'd made, pretending I didn't remember him.

"It's too late to take back the lie now, it's been weeks Kat." I pleaded mostly with myself.

"Oh you poor baby" she jumped away from the mirror and ran for the door, following the cue we took a brisk to the dorm's cafeteria. In which was filled with many other students amongst them Tae and Jimin.

Jimin motioned for us to join him, I motioned back 'no thanks we're fine.' Kat saw the exchange and was kind enough now to mention it , she knew why I couldn't join.

~~

Mother was talking loudly over dad's voice trying to drive the conversation back to the plastic coaster failing to absorb some dribbled liquid sitting on the sitting room table, she was obsessing actually. Dad and I just wanted to talk ball though based on what my video call both dad and I were feeling defeated scratching the back of our necks whilst I tried dodging responsibility for leaving the coaster on the table.

"Oh that's Taehyung isn't he?" my mom screamed into the phone.

"Move your shoulder and make him come say hello honey" she yelled again whilst I was craning my neck wondering where and when he'd come in. I hadn't heard the door open.

"Taehyungie!" my mother screeched again. Making Taehyung reveal his box smile and make his way over where I was.

"Mr and Mrs Jeon. How have you been?" he put his arm around my shoulder so we both would fit fine on the screen. I however felt exposed, that dread in my stomach rose up again,I felt heat rise up to my face. I was entangled in my thoughts I actually missed out on the conversation between my parents and Tae.

Tae shook my shoulder disrupting my thoughts. I hummed in reply to him, his eyes gestured to the screen. I threw my gaze to the screen and my mom spoke "honey are you alright?"

"yea I'm ok. I got to go now though." Hoping my face wasn't giving too much away I claimed.

"but before you do sweetie why didn't you mention you saw Tae?" she asked

Dad piped in too "or that he's your roommate."

I felt the air fill up with curiosity emitting from Taehyung. That didn't deter me from lying though "I have to go now mom, dad...we'll talk later. I love you." With a nod I slammed my macbook shut and took a step away from Tae for my room. I felt his hands pull me back towards him. Then he said "You don't remember me but your parents seem to remember me just fine."

I looked at him , his eyes boring into mine intently ,sad and full of emotion. I looked away out of guilt. The dread in my stomach growing much larger and tying knots tighter in there. My throat felt full and I had to gulp down and lie to him again.

"My parents still remember even the kids I went to pre-school with. I just don't remember you ok V" I retorted harsher than I should have nor required. But I did. He released my shoulder and muttered something inaudible to himself.

When I'd reached my bedroom door, ready to slam it shut he spoke making me crane my neck back at him.

"If you're skeptical of me, you don't need to. I was just confused back then now I know you're straight. I will not come on to you again. Ok?" Taehyung said sincerity lining in his posture and his tongue laced with eloquence.

I slammed the door shut. Feeling self disgust crawl up my skin and under, creating for a leeway to my stomach making the dread sink in deeper and my chest to sink in my heart as it strained. All of it causing physical pain to my entire body , under another pair of eyes I would've kept myself together but I felt my entire mind ricocheting. I fixed my dark orb filled eyes to where my chest of drawers where. Keeping my gaze on the first drawer like a chick I still kept the neck chain I threw my hand to my mouth to muffle any crying sounds as I felt a free pour of tears streak down my heat filled face.

I couldn't blame this on the devil , I couldn't cry to God. I had no one to ask for sympathy. I only had myself to blame.