NINE

I thought about lying to him but then again he felt like the first genuine friend I'd made here besides the girls and definitely besides the guys on the team.

"Why?" I stretched out my left leg opening it out more to sit freely with my legs apart and took a large gulp from the beer I held in my right.

"Dammit! Jeon! Just be honest I have you pegged as a good guy right now don't make me change my mind." He pleaded sitting down to match me.

"How'd you figure it out?" feeling sick and shameful I put the beer bottle down averting my gaze at anywhere else but him.

He chuckled.

Looking at him again his eyes were friendly and full of compassion I couldn't help but start with a sigh before I chose to share with him everything. Without holding anything back I started with when it hit me that I liked Tae like that this was even before the graduation day. I told him how scared I was and how unbelievable I found it when Tae told me he liked me on graduation day nervously I dipped into my reaction holding back any justifications I always prepared in the back of my mind for how horribly and disgustingly I reacted to Tae telling me on graduation day.

This was different from when I told Emily. Baek was gay and my reaction even from then I expected would get me punched or scolded to a bit but neither of that happened instead he hugged me and shared with me his story and how embarrassing it was for him and his family when he first came out. He explained his mother was still coming to terms with his sexuality and his father almost severed all ties with him he also told me I was like the only other person he'd told this too at school besides Ansel. Taking the night away from the barbeque we grabbed a plate full of sausages and headed straight to the coffee shop. Things between us were much clearer and easier without the pressure of making it a date. Baek also proved to be pro love when for the fourth time on our third round of teas he tried to urge me into just being honest with Tae.

Soon enough we were back at the front of my dorm in the parking lot where we sat in the car for at least forty minutes just talking. Eventually we both had to go.

~

As I made my way down the hallway alone I was mentally entangled in my thoughts making up the different scenarios that I was sure one of which will happen. The most realistic being me getting back to the dorm to a pissed off Tae one who wouldn't be willing to reason or hear me out for how I turned him down and said I wasn't gay. I would however eventually finally get a word in when he got tired of being mad and I would explain everything to him. We would kiss and talk about him leaving Jimin for me. It was A given.

The closer I got to the door the more my nerves started biting, nibbling my insides and itching under my skin. Senselessly nervous I stood still at the door, my hands sweating in anticipation of the confrontation that waited for me inside. I didn't look forward nor was I excited for fighting with Tae but the promise of the aftermath excited me and already I couldn't wait so I crooned the door handle, got inside and was surprised to see two surprised faces facing back at me.

Both seemed to have been all out of tears and in the middle of a fight. The room was drenched in stale energy and my being here now only seemed to make this only tenser that it probably was already. Slowly I closed the door behind me "Hey." I managed to say through my clogged throat.

Instead I was ignored.

Jimin snorted, wiping his face with his left hand, his right sitting on top of his head making sure no tears were showing but they were dried up he moved behind Tae as Tae tried to take his hand. "Don't touch me" through gritted teeth he said then he threw me a look that only stayed on me a mere seconds but if looks could kill....

"Jimin please" Through gritted teeth Tae trailed behind Jimin who was only in a hurry to leave. He ignored Tae and banged the door close behind him rather too harshly. I stood frozen behind the couch not even trying to hide my eye contact fixed on him. He fixed his on me and stayed on looking at me, he opened up his mouth as if he wanted to say something maybe even ask me and I felt my insides daring him to ask me anything. He put his hand over his mouth then removed it fidgeting with it on top of his head grabbing fistfuls of his own hair in frustration then without a word walked away from the door.

"Are you ok?" I asked this was me pleading with him to not walk away from me.

Instead he scoffed and closed his room door shut just as harshly and loud as Jimin door bang.

I felt out of the loop. I also felt hated and the thought of losing him even though he wasn't really mine anymore I mustered up all the courage I could find within me to go on to his door and knock.

It was in that moment when I heard the muffled sounds of his looking for his slippers that I realized we were alone, just the two of us in this entire dorm. It was also the first time I was on his door. Soon enough the door opened revealing a shirtless Tae ,his face was now a little less flushed from when I'd first come in the room "What is it?" he asked as if he wanted me gone like an unwanted errand boy. And any sane person would've noted off that and left it alone or done anything else not what I did.

Impulsively and tempted by him shirtless before me in reachable delicious distance I moved in closer to him and his eyes widened at the movement before he could think or say anything I impulsively grabbed him by the back of his neck and locked lips with him. Softly I kissed him, I pulled away just enough to get an impact of a slap or fist on anywhere on me when it didn't come I pulled back in locking again and this time I dived in with more passion wanting to get tongue action in I asked for entrance in his mouth with my tongue. He didn't grant me but I could feel him rising against my body it was impossible not to we were almost one in closeness that couldn't hide a secret. Cleverly I softly gave his lower lip a nibble and he opened his mouth to let out a gasp and voila I was in, I grew more excited. My heart was beating fast in anticipation and happiness but then suddenly he pushed himself off me.

In between short gasps for air I spoke "Tae, it's ok."

He shook his head and said "No you're not a fag remember?"

My body tensed at his response and no answer came to mind.

"Oryou must not remember?" it was a question but his tone was very menacing

a/n: don't forget to leave a vote when you can and a comment for all your reviews and reactions. Bless you. Also do look anticipate for a new book i'm dropping first of August.