Now, what I’m about to tell you ain’t your average bridge-troll riddle. You might even wanna call this a fairy tale or some ghost story if you’re the logical type. And if you are, in all unfortunate accounts, a logical thinker, then you may want to sit down with an extra cup of Tea’n’Brains™ for this one.

For this here’s the illogical albeit true account of the Long●Lost Youth.

I know what you’re thinking, Stinky (if you don’t mind me calling you as such; it’s a blatant trait of yours). You’re thinking, “Why should I care about some youth who got lost in… I dunno, a bunch of hanging retail clothes?” Or something similarly less gurgle-ish if your jaw wasn’t so rotted. And my reply would be, one, this kid we’re talking about got in way more trouble than that, to the point of forcing Hallows Earth’s status quo to walk a rickety plank that hung over a sea of utter anarchy. And two…

The kid’s return tipped the status quo over with a poke of the sword.

So why don’t we cater to your logic, at least for the moment, and start at the very beginning with a ghost story. The one that all good monster parents use to scare their monster kids from thinking that the Royal life was something to be desired. Hope you’re comfy with your blanket and tea. If so, then stop it. You’re making a mockery of all creature-kind. Just kidding.

By the way… Are you afraid of anything specific? Got any… phobias? Uh-huh… Oh, it’s nothing. Just don’t say this bridge-troll didn’t warn yah.

Ah-hem...

"Gone. Gone! GONE!"

Krak-DOOM! DOOM!

The clock tower struck two in the morning at the lightning strike. Look at the time from the city floor, and you would find the clock faces at the mercy of tarantulas the size of ogres.

Monsters rushed left and right. Spiders! Spiders overran the city of Ayzabin! The torrential deluge was bad enough. Now spiders as small as a pinprick to as large as a steam wagon terrorized the monster-run city nestled in the valley.

A blob monster slithered with his gum-wad son down the street from a galumphing red-eyed arachnid catching-catching-catching up--! Hordes of spiders rampaged a bar top, of which underneath hid huddled zombies who sorely wished for their beers at that moment. One spider tipped a stein over for a quick search before placing it back. Another cluster horrified a couple of werewolves by barging into their apartment, followed by leaving the lichens confused as the spiders left as fast as a sweep.

Despite their rampage, the spiders left the city without causing a fatality. Turned out, plagues of spiders ransacked nearby towns without a single thing stolen or a single creature killed.

“Why was this?” creatures murmured to each other. “Did something happen to the Arachne Family?” Humdrum gossip tinkled until the sensational truth tolled across all of Hallows Earth.

The newborn princess of arachnophobia had been kidnapped.