I never thought much about the differences between me and my family; sure I’m taller than the rest of them, my legs longer than theirs, and my hair a light golden copper while theirs are brown, slightly greyer, or dusty light-colored. My family, a pack of large wolves; myself, a small frail child found wandering in the forest, the perfect prey for them. One wolf, larger than all, full of wisdom and life; he is my guardian, he is my dream, he is my grandfather, and he has left me.

    I never thought much about the wants my family has of me, the wolves don’t care about my goals; they care for the pups, making them strong, the new leaders of the pack. One wolf, sees my goals and speaks confidence into my ear, tells me stories of his life and his dreams now are my dreams; he is my teacher, he is my support, my rock, my refuge from the wolves of the family and world, he is my grandfather, and he has left me.

    I never thought much about how my family’s views could hurt me; how even the smallest detail about someone else could make them have ill feelings towards them. One wolf, sees those details and doesn’t judge them aloud, he respects all whose views aren’t like his own, and he shows me all the differences in the world. He is a leader, he is a listener, a follower, a pure thinker; he is my grandfather, and he has left me.

    I often think about the lives my family interacts with, how they put on a persona just for the occasion and then complain behind closed doors later on. One wolf shows me how not to lose myself in the false airs I show others, and how to reveal my truest heart at the most important time. He is a master of disguise, he is a magician at revealing the true, an expert of speaking his mind, a man who knows the way the world works; he is my grandfather, and he has left me.

    I know the truths my family pushes into my life; how they act and think around them and other people in the world, how to be the “perfect” object that is the most sought after.

    I think a lot about that wolf; strong and noble, wise and confident. His silver hair, the shining beauty of his life, the color of time he has lived. His words, echoes of knowledge and humor; the words that linger in my mind and push my hopes higher, the words that are large and as strong as he was. His hands course and rough, soft on my shoulders leading me to the future, to the world he sees, a world full of wolves but not like him; he is my path, he is my guide, my knowledge of the world around me, my push that I need, he is my grandfather, and he has left me.

    I know I’ll never forget that wolf, and all the teachings he shared with me. The journeys he took me while telling stories of the world he knows, and the places he’s been. The words that he spoke, of being yourself and never losing it in the mist of falsehood. The lessons he taught, while smoking his cigar on the plastic chair, about following your dreams and never giving them up to someone else to make them for you.

    I’ll always remember that wolf, for he is my grandfather, and although he is no longer with me, his words, his face, and his love will forever remain with me. Because I am his granddaughter, and I will never let him go.