“Kai.”
“Yes, Master?”
“Come sleep on the floor. Next to my bed.”
“Okay.”
“Kai, tonight I want to do a test. Sleep on the floor.”
Like a dog? “Yes, Master. But what will we say to Mother and Father if they see?”
“I’ll just say that you wanted to sleep there. Easy.”
“Okay.”
“Here, dog.” He leans down to tap the floor.
I get out of bed and walk over, then sit down. “I am here, Master.”
“Good. Now go to sleep.”
As soon as I curl up, my head is yanked up, and I cough and choke, the leash holding me up. I claw at the collar and suddenly I fall back onto the floor. I pant, sucking in air.
“Whoa, so it works like that, too?”
I cough. “It appears so, Master.” My voice is weak, and I cough more until it sounds normal.
He pulls the leash again, and I am on my knees, staring up at him. I look down, my ears folding back. He looks in my eyes. “Will you do something for me, Kai?”
“Of course, Master.” My voice is hushed, like his is.
“Kai, if I tell you to eat shit, would you do it?”
My stomach turns. “If you ordered me to do that, Master, I could not refuse.” Sweat trickles down my neck.
He is quiet, then he drops me. I slump to the floor. “Okay. How about this.” He grins and rubs his hands together. “I want to see how dog-like you are. I want you to take off your dress, walk around the house, and patrol our yard until the moon sets. Then, I want you to go into the yard and sleep next to the animals until sunrise.”
“Okay.”
“Then you can come back here and put your clothes on.”
“Yes, Master.”
“I’ll be watching you. Don’t run away.” He pulls the leash.
“I understand, Master. I will stay.”
“Good dog. Sit.”
I sit on my heels.
“Now pant like those real dogs.”
The feeling is completely strange to me, but I do as Master says. I open my mouth, stick out my tongue, and breathe quickly, looking up at him, feeling very less-than-animal.
“Wag your tail, doggie.”
I get on my knees and hands and continue to pant as my tail waves under my shirt.
He watches me, but I do not understand the look on his face. He gets out of bed very slowly and gently pulls the leash. Still holding it, he walks to the door.
I follow, on my hands and knees.
“Stand up. And stop panting.”
I do as he says.
“Be quiet.” He opens the door slowly and brings me with him. We walk into the main room and he opens the front door.
We step outside. The moon is between the sky and the earth, just above the trees, so small. A cold breeze blows past us. I follow Master a distance away from the house. He drops the leash and looks at me, staring me in the eyes. “Down.”
Was that the same as sit? I quickly sit back on my heels.
“All fours. Good.”
I look up at him.
“Take off your dress.”
I slip it off and place it in his waiting hand. He sniffs it, and my ear twitches. He looks back at me and I look away.
He folds his arms, still holding my shirt. “Howl.”
There is no instinct in omegas where howling is natural. But I think of all the howls I have heard from my clan. I tilt my face to the sky, take a deep breath, and howl.
It is too long, too loud, and nothing like a real wolf’s. But I howl, because Master ordered. When the howl is done, I am left gasping.
“That was long.”
“Was it as you wished, Master?” A drop of sweat runs down my face.
“Yeah.” Then he stares up at the sky and howls.
But it is not a howl. I tilt my head at the noise. It sounds like a dog bark and a child’s wail.
He is laughing when he finishes. “That was you. You’re not a wolf.” He nudges me in the chest with his foot. “I can do better.”
I look at the ground and stare at my hands. My tail droops. “I understand, Master.”
“No, you don’t. You don’t get it.” He sounds tired.
“Master, is something wrong?”
“Is something wrong, you ask?” He leans down and his breath is on my face. “Maybe it’s you who’s all wrong. Dog boy.”
The way he speaks makes me shiver. I feel my shirt wrap around my neck. He presses the fabric against my face.
“Whimper.”
I mimic the sounds of the village dogs – high-pitched and fearful. My toes curl, my nails press into the dirt. My tail tucks itself between my legs, like a real dog.
He releases his hands, and I am gasping, my own shirt dangling from my neck. “Put your dress back on, dog.”
I slip it on, my head hurting from the strangeness of tonight, the lack of air from breathing into my shirt. When I look at him walking in front of me, I cannot help but cower a little, my tail wrapped around me, my ears folding back.
We stop at the front door. “Now do the patrol and sleep with the animals.”
“Yes, Master.” My voice is quiet.
“Good dog. Don’t come back until sunrise.”
“Yes, Master.”
He shuts the door, and I do nothing else but walk around the house, watching the night, the animals, the forest, the smallness of the moon. I stop at Master’s window, but the curtains block the room. There is a mix of silence and laughter.
My ears twitch. What was he happy for?
I curl up in the dirt, near the animals, just as Master said. I close my eyes. I listen to the animals and the plants and the bugs move and breathe in their own ways, and wait for the sun to rise.
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