I’ve discovered that the barista isn’t hot, instead he is warm and cuddly like a worn out teddy bear. So Eden said, as she sat across from me, drinking a café latte.

“Mackenzie, he is far too nice and always whistles when he’s happy. It’s so irksome,” said Eden, roughing her black hair in annoyance.

Irksome? I questioned to myself. Is that even a word?

“Yes, it is,” said Eden, glaring at me. “Irksome is definitely a word.”

“What did I say?” I asked, trying to urgently suck all the caffeine from my americano.

“I know that look,” replied Eden, folding her arms like she knew all the answers to the world’s biggest problems –except her own. “You warned me he might be hot but a bit… slow and maybe boring and… well…”

“…And well, as usual you fell for his looks, muscles and his impressive button pressing on the espresso machine,” I said, sighing in the process. “Eden, you’ve got to learn to be selective –I told you three months ago that he was dull! He didn’t laugh at my coffee and cream joke and everyone laughs at that even Ruth.”

“Did someone say my name?” quipped Ruth, sitting next to us.

“Ruth, didn’t you say you were going to be fifteen minutes late?” I coughed out and quickly looked at my cellphone. “It’s just 1:15 pm, you said you’d be here at 1:20pm. Even early when you are meant to be late.”

“I was stuck with Dylan, helping him with his homework assignment for high school,” explained Ruth as she settled into the chair and inspected the menu. “I thought I’d be longer since he’s rather slow.”

“He isn’t the only one,” I smirked, grinning at Eden.

“Who else is slow?” asked Ruth, raising her hand for the waitress.

“Aaron,” replied Eden, glaring at me.

“Are you still dating him?” said Ruth, in disbelief. “I can’t believe it! He has zero potential on all levels except for his red cappuccino which is… on a scale of one to ten, a six.”

“Rather a six than zero,” I said.

“And who is a zero?” asked Ruth, as the waitress approached. Ruth ordered a red cappuccino and a green salad.

“Dylan Farris,” replied Eden, sipping her caffe latte. “A major zero.”

“What?” said Ruth, blinking for a full five seconds before she understood the meaning. “We are not dating! He is in high school!”

“Then why are you blushing?” I asked, quirking a questioning eyebrow.

“I am not,” exclaimed Ruth, her cheeks brightening as her eyes went big at the accusation.

“There isn’t anything wrong with dating someone younger than you,” said Eden. “I’ve done it numerous of times – younger guys tend to be sweeter and heartfelt.”

“And less boring?” I grinned.

“Definitely less boring, although they don’t have much to say – they are always entertaining,” said Eden, with a smile that held her more than entertaining memories.

“I would never date Dylan!” protested Ruth like it was a sin against humanity. “He is my brother’s friend and we’ve known each other for years.”

“That’s what my grandmother said about my grandfather,” I teased, picking up the menu. “And look how all those years brought them together.”

“There is no possible way!” said Ruth, rather loudly. “He’s like my little brother and I know he doesn’t see me in that way.”

“What non-infatuated high school boy does homework on Saturday?” said Eden, thick with sarcasm.

Ruth was awfully quiet as she considered Eden’s rhetorical question. Her salad and red cappuccino arrived on the table.

“I think I need a dessert,” I said, scanning the menu. “Wanna share one with me Eden?”

“Rather not,” replied Eden. “I’m on a sugar free diet.”

“Another diet?” I said, unimpressed. “You’re already the thinnest of us. Who exactly are you trying to impress?”

“Professor Patterson,” replied Eden. “I overheard he likes slim girls.”

“What exactly do you see in Professor Patterson?” I asked, losing my appetite. “He is a condescending jackass!”

“That’s impolite,” stated Ruth.

“It’s the truth!” I exclaimed. “He keeps making snide comments about me to the entire class!”

“Well, that’s cause you wrote an assignment on an entire different topic than the one he taught,” explained Ruth, logically. “He’s only picking on you because he doesn’t want other students to make the same mistake –it’s a fair judgment.”

“Except that it’s humiliating!” I scoffed, drinking all of my americano in a huff. “It’s the fourth month already –you’d think he’d lay off it by now.”

Ruth and Eden ignored me.

“I like his eyes,” said Eden. “They’re so intense –sometimes when he looks at me I feel my insides burn and it’s a good burn.”

“Aren’t you dating Aaron?” questioned Ruth, picking at her salad.

“Yeah,” replied Eden, nodding casually. “You can’t just date one guy. You have to date multiple guys with different backgrounds and talents.”

“But –“ began Ruth.

“I date Aaron so I can get free café lattes,” interrupted Eden, “I date Robert so he edits my assignments, I date –“

“How many guys are you dating?” I interrupted Eden.

“Seven,” answered Eden, swiftly. “Hopefully it will be eight, once I get Professor Patterson.”

“Seven! That’s insane!” exclaimed Ruth, flabbergasted. “You can’t go after Professor Patterson, he’s a professor and you could get expelled!”

“Not if no one tells,” smirked Eden, winking at me and Ruth.

“I think I need something stronger than a dessert,” I said, burying my head in the menu.