I remembered the first time I Kamehameha a nether region. I will not describe the experience considering there are a billion Kamasutra books.

However, I did get horrendous food poisoning one time from McDonald's. The toilet was my best friend, he never let me down when I needed him the most.

During this time, I went to school every day. Not because I was a good student but because I would get incredibly bored if I stayed home. I would either cut wood for the family or just play the same video game for the hundredth time.

For the morning class, I needed to call in to explain to the teacher that McDicks gave me food poisoning with the Mcfoodpoisioningburger.

He told everyone the situation and someone from the class called me. A random voice of a person I never heard before asked, “Are you ok?” I replied, “NOT REALLY, I MEAN WOULD YOU CONSIDER CUDDLING THE TOLIET AS OK?” This was not the answer she was looking for. She said, “oh ok I will call you later!” and hung up.

I found out later that this person had a crush and I scared the ever living shit out of her with my answer. First impressions have never been my strong point.