“What are you doing?” the mentally unstable man asked.
“Calling the police.”
After a sigh, there was a tornado of flower petals that swirled around the man. He seemed to levitate for a moment as the petals faded to reveal the same man donned in lavish embroidered robes with gold trim. His formerly tied up hair was now half down and fell gracefully over his shoulders. The lazy look on his face hadn't changed, though.
“So, then! What's the problem, ungrateful mortal?” There was a pause where Jun could've sworn the man―the god snorted.
Jun’s brain churned. He was a god?! He'd said… the God of Love?! “Yeeeah!” Jun shouted. “You… You crappy God of Love!”
“Crappy? You wanted matches, so I gave them to you.”
“They're all creeps!”
“Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.”
“The last guy was arrested for robbery.”
“What kind of God of Love are you? Are your powers broken?”
A whirlwind of flowers passed by again and the geekily dressed God took a seat on the steps of the back door. “I've been doing this for 200 years. Humans are picky. They ignore fate and signs. Even when drawn to a match, they'll go for someone else.”
“So you're saying it's our fault? Maybe you just don't do your job the right way.” Jun folded his arms. “How do they work? Your powers.”
The god stroked his chin. “I evaluate their traits and personality and… blah blah. It's too complicated for you to understand.”
“Well, what about me? Whatever you're doing isn't working for me. I was born with this ability to see people’s matches but it's useless even when I can see my own.”
“You were… what?”
“Colored auras above their hearts. Soulmates have the same co―w-why are you so close?”
The God of Love’s eyes were wide as his face was inches away from Jun’s. Jun smashed his lips together to fight the rising blush.
Jun stumbled backwards, his butt landing on the concrete as the back door swung open and Mr. Kent popped his head out. “Everything alright?”
“Uh...” Jun looked in front of him to find the space empty. The God had disappeared. Had he been hallucinating? “Um….”
“You look pale.” Mr. Kent frowned with worry. “It's slow tonight, why don't you head home? I'll hold down the fort with the others.”
Jun stammered, unable to form any words as his thoughts jumped around. Mr. Kent nodded slowly and closed the door, muttering sympathies.
A hand wrapped around Jun’s arm. His eyes shot up to see the God had returned. “Let's discuss this someplace more private.”
Jun’s sight was covered by spinning petals, obscuring his view with nothing but pink. He felt his feet part from the ground but before he could panic, they were flat on a floor again. The petals fell away revealing the inside of his small apartment.
Jun crouched down and picked up one of the thousands of pink petals lying on his floor. “Can't you make these disappear?”
“Only when outside.” The God fell onto the couch and crossed his ankle over his knee.
So what? Jun was just supposed to vacuum up the grove’s worth of petals in his living space?!
“Jun Adachi. 20 year old art student. Likes men. Possible gap moe.”
“Does your family come from a line of matchmakers?”
“Not that I know of.”
“I'll have to get my assistant to look into this,” he muttered to himself. “Well! Centuries ago, the God of Love, my predecessor, put bits of his power into people around the world who became matchmakers. The practice was stopped but bits of that power were passed down generations until there was none left to give. So even if your family came from that line, someone at your age in this time period shouldn't have such pure powers.”
Eyes narrowed, Jun stopped piling up petals to look the God up and down. “Wait, what's in your hand?”
After witnessing that shirt, Jun couldn't be surprised. “So if you've been doing this for 200 years, it's your powers I have.”
The god froze. “Ha. Ha. Ha ha ha,” he laughed robotically. Suddenly, he was inches away from Jun again, covering the human’s mouth. “It was an accident. Don't say anything or I could get in big trouble.”
Jun swatted his hand away and glared. “I don't care about that. I just want you to fix my matches. Everyone with the same aura as me is a bad person, that can't be right.”
With crossed arms, the God shook his head looking smug. “The one rule of having powers is that they can't be used on yourself. So it's definitely a glitch.”
The god snapped his fingers and a mass of petals smacked into Jun’s face. “Please tell me those were the petals already here.”
“I can't take away your powers but I removed the spell that gave you matches, so you shouldn't be able to see your own aura anymore.”
Jun looked down at his chest and sure enough it had returned to the same plain chest it'd been for twenty years before two days ago. “I still want love, though.” Jun frowned but couldn't help the pout that slipped through. “Take responsibility!”
The god smirked. “I know I'm handsome but sorry to break it to you, gods can't have what division they work for.”
“What?” Coming to a realization, Jun hugged his body protectively and blushed. “I-I didn't mean like that! Find me matches! Good ones!”
“Fine, mortal,” the God said, standing up and transforming into his official robes.
Jun shed a tear at the new flower petals. “Please stop.”
“I will make a deal with you!” the God declared with drama.
“Can you stop doing that creepy echo?”
“I will personally find your soulmates and facilitate your matches!”
Jun waited with anticipation. What would he ask for? His soul? His first born child?
“I want the limited edition Mei Ayomami Leon Genesis Gospel x Kyouka Kirimoto Kyoto Ghoul crossover collector's figure!”
“Wait, wait, wait…” Jun pinched between his eyebrows. “You said figure? You mean you want an action figure?”
“They're collectors figures.”
The God lifted his chin. “Do we have a deal or not, human?”
All this guy wanted was an action figure in exchange for Jun finally having a boyfriend and falling in love? “Deal!” He wondered how they'd seal the deal. With blood? A kiss?!
The God smirked devilishly and gripped Jun’s hand to shake. Petals surrounded them and Jun honestly thought he'd rather have bled out in a blood pact.
The God, dressed dorkily again, laid down on the couch and curled up with his handheld Doutendo. “Do you mind unpacking my stuff? Thanks.”
What stuff? Jun wondered before looking over beside the couch to find a pile of suitcases, boxes of game systems, games, and figurines.
Jun looked back at the God whose free hand was scratching his butt. “Oh, and if you have any delivery menus, toss them here. I'm starving.”