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This TomTord.

I have become frustrated, there is a specific kind of fanfiction I want to read. But for some reason, I can't find the type I'm looking for. I get so bored!!!! I'm certain the stories I dropped from reading are great and well written, but it's not what I want nor is it what I'm looking for.

So, here, something like this!

Please, you don't have to read it, I am just writing to get out my anger. It feels like there aren't anymore fanfictions with Tom being sub in any kind of situation, despite - what ever. this isn't smut, but, fxck. just fxck off. fxck you. I'm writing this anyways.

To make myself feel better, because I can't find anything I haven't already read.

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TORD POV-

There is this sort of thing between me and the short tempered man before me. I would look in his direction from time to time to pxss him off, he then would curse and flip me the bird. I would then laugh, insult him and then he would punch me and repeat.

We'd do this from time to time, as a little routine between long intervals of silence and avoidance. We would tolerate each other, neither tempting to bother our mutual acquaintances. It was fun yet irritating. I digress....

Until....

One day, I do as I usually do then it's time to fight again. I stare and prod and - nothing.

What?

I look at him, he looks a head.

He's ignoring me.

That bxstard!

He knows life is so gog dxmn boring with out a little heck.

I huff, getting up and -

"What the frick!?"

I decked him in the face. He didn't fight back, he didn't even get back up.

"You're not dead, get up.", my voice droned at him.

"..."

Nothing. again.

"Why...why the heck aren't you putting up a fight, you little shxt?"

He mumbled something, I didn't hear.

"Speak up."

"I...I don't have time to indulge you and your violent tendencies today, so fxck off.", he spoke softly like he's afraid of something.

Is...is he afraid of me?

No. Not me...never me. he can't, I won't let him. He wouldn't dare.....

"What's your problem, shxthead?"

He finally stands, I still have to stare down to look at him. His back is to me. I don't see his empty eyes like I would if he had done what he's suppose to. This is not the establish- he's speaking again.

"When Edd comes home.....tell him I'm not coming down for dinner. Matt....he....know what? Tell him, I think he's not that popular."

"You tell them, I'm not your-"

He left.

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An hour and fifteen minutes later and Edd's home with cat food and veggies. Also a cursed object, you know, the usual.

"Tord! Could you hand me the bat or a chainsaw that is conveniently placed next to you?"

He shrugged.

"Nope."

He then left Edd and Matt to fight the demon. Going into the kitchen to get a drink and Tom was there. Drinking coffee and watching them from the kitchen. He stood next to him.

"How much do you want to bet-"

"I don't feel like it."

Tom walked calmly to his room after setting the coffee cup down. Tord tighten his fist and stared after him.

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Edd was out with Tord as they tried to pick up chicks. Matt was in his room polishing mirrors and checking if they were perfect. He is. But will they show even a fraction of it?

Tom was in the back yard playing with Ringo. The cat curled up on his lap, his hand brushing the cat's fur. Soothing, calm and comforting.

"Ringo....do you feel sad sometimes?"

Matt's window was open and he put his mirror down to look outside. He watched Tom struggle with a blank expression.

"That...sometimes...."

He was quiet and Matt waited. Tom looked up and they met eyes. After some time, Matt reached out and closed the window. He went back to his mirrors, slowly rubbing at the surface of the mirror. Quiet and thoughtful.

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Edd and Tord came home with a red mark on each of them. The shape of a hand on their cheeks. Edd laughed awkwardly and headed up stairs to go to bed. Tom and Matt in the living room, on the couch. Matt blankly staring at the screen and cuddling Tom as he slept with a purple blanket on him. Tord noticed to quiet and sat without a word next to Tom. He stared at him and then at Matt, who then looked into his eyes for a pause.

"..."

They look to the screen and pretended to watch a movie. It wasn't funny.

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The house had a morbid feeling to it, that even the neighbors had to drop by to question it. Edd gave no answer, watching his friends as they don't speak. They aren't avoiding each other, but he was still worried. He tried to address it, but no one told him. Matt sighed. Tord stood up and slammed his door closed with him in it. Tom sat there, without a word. Matt standing and patted Tom's head and Edd's shoulder.

"It's best to sit and wait."

One look, in Matt's eyes, he knew. It was bad. What it was? No one knew, Tom knew. He didn't say. He sat and sat and didn't move. Edd sat with him and Matt left the house without a mirror. He needed air.

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Tom is in the kitchen. It was a surprise. He hasn't been there in a while. Edd stood at the entrance. Watching, staring. Tom turned and sat at the table. Staring back, not moving. Food within reach, but doing nothing to retrieve it. Edd sat a cross from him.

"I'm dying, you know."

Which one said that?

Neither looked like either did, like no one spoke at all. Both calm, almost pleasant. It wasn't.

A nod to acknowledge that and they both made a move to hold hands over the table. A warm, tan hand squeezes a small pale, cold hand.

"Let's eat.", said Edd.

"....Why should we?"

"To live a little longer."

Tom said nothing back and let Edd fill his plate with a small portion. Edd's plate with the same portion. After a bit, Tom spoke.

"Should we tell the others?"

"....Matt's not doing so well."

"He knows...."

"He's suspicious."

"Tord doesn't know."

"He doesn't have too."

"Edd.....?"

"...Please?"

"...Okay."

Breakfast was wasted, in the bathroom, a back was rubbed and a stomach was empty.

"Shh....soon."

"I hope."

"...."

"I'm sorry, but it hurts."

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Tom lays in bed as stares at the ceiling. The world was dark and his door opens. They walk closer, his eyes never leaving the ceiling. The bed dips and a face appears in front of him.

"..."

An arm a round him and a body next to him. He closes his eyes when two more bodies join him. No more nightmares for the night.

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Tord is confused, why is no one talking anymore? He went with it, because it seemed important that he didn't speak. But now....no one is, not even Edd. Why? What changed? What started this?

He looked at Tom, no sign of anything.

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A month later and a 360 turn happened. Edd is smiling and Matt is talking. Tom started drink again, he stopped sometime ago when they all went to the hospital. Tom got his head stuck in a tuba after a jungle adventure. He never stopped laughing, even when he felt sick and wanted to vomit. Things are bad. Why did he feel sick? Edd started laughing and he sounded like he was crying but no one mentioned it. so he didn't.

Matt still seems odd. Why doesn't his eyes sparkle anymore? Not even when he sees his reflection. At least their smiling again and yet strained. Tom looks like shxt, isn't he suppose too?

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Tom walks past Tord in the hall. They bump into each other. Things are normal.

"Watch it, fxck face!"

"....Sorry."

Tom kept walking and Tord stopped. He watched him leave again.

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Edd's in the living room watching a movie without moving. Petting Ringo, the cat sleeping. Matt is standing in front of a mirror next to the couch, fixing his hair. Tord stands next to Tom again. Coffee in his hand and Tord crossing his arms, looking a head. Tom never taking a sip of coffee, making it cold.

"Tom, want to-"

"No thank you, I don't feel like."

He set the coffee down and started to walking a way.

"You brushed me off again!", Tord shouted after him.

He froze. Matt stopped looking in the mirror and Edd turned off the TV. They looked at them. Tom didn't turn a round.

"That's the third time you brushed me off.", he stated almost calmly.

Tom turned to him with out expression. Tord glared and his fists where white. Tom didn't flinch.

"....I....don't....have to....talk to you...."

Tord snarled.

"Then why do you!? When we're alone and when it's bad, why do you? We use to talk for hours when you were sad. Come into my room at night for a hug, you'd go to Matt- Edd! You never went to-"

"He has.", Edd piped up.

"..."

"Tord....I trust you, I do. But....I don't....feel like it, right now."

"When do you ever, 'Feel like it" anymore? What's wrong with you, why are you...."

"I...I'll tell you later. maybe. If I'm....ready."

They all left it at that.

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Tom is crying. He shouldn't be crying, so why is he crying? Stop crying. Stop it. Please. Please stop. It hurts to watch.

He looks up at where he door is, Tord stands there, unsure.

"Tord...."

He nods and locks the door. Walking over, Tom buries his head into Tord's chest and he pats Tom's back. He lets him weep.

"Tord.....can I tell you?"

"Yes."

"You will not speak?"

"Yes."

"You will not tell?"

"Yes."

"....then-"

They stay hushed behind the door and the world doesn't hear no matter how it strains. Never will or should it be able to light the whispers that pass their lips. It remains still.

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"Are you sure?"

"Yes, they need to know."

"But, I'm scared. They don't need to know!"

"You're friends, they love you. They need to know you."

"They know all of me! Nothing else to know."

"You never told them all of you, you speak nothing to them."

"You speak nothing as well."

"...."

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Tord pins him, loosely. Not to trap him, but to comfort. Keeping calm, to feel safe. They are safe.

"Don't look a way, look at me."

He does not. He til his head gently. They stare.

"I am fire, you are ice. You will melt and I will calm. Stay with me, stay near. I need you here."

"....Water moves."

"And water stays, it's here and never leaves. Fire leaves, water stays."

"Fire takes when fire leaves."

"Water gives when water stays."

Tord sighs.

"Will you ever tell me what's going on with them?"

"I will if you stay."

"You make it sound like it would make me stay."

"It will."

"Then I won't listen."

"Neither will I."

He paused.

Then he lifts his hand and takes Tom's. Bringing it to his mouth with press a kiss. Tom keeps his eyes on Tord's and neither looks a way. A light blush making it's way to him and he brings their hands to his chest and places his other hand on the connected pair. Tord leans in to press his head to Tom's. They stay like that. Tom's lips kissing their hands. Gentle squeezes.

Matt watches at one end of the hall and Edd listening behind a door with a slight frown.

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Tord leaves them and their suffocating house.

Fire needs to breathe, to grow. To be strong. To spread. Water is constant, even when it wavers. Wind dies down and picks back up. Grass wilts and sometimes...it never comes back. Yet, it's a cycle of never ending pain and continues as long as there is at least one of them. Until one is left, there's always one left. Alone.

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He leaves you and takes your secret. Promising. To keep it to the grave.

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He doesn't.

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This isn't even what I was upset about and it doesn't matter. At least I feel better. BYE!