“You’re getting married?!” Anna screams when I tell her everything that has happened to me two days later.
“Yes.” I say looking around at the people staring at us as we walk by. Some congratulate me and I have to say thank you as we pass.
“To who? You haven’t shown any interest in a man since High School and he was our history teacher.” Anna says and I pinch her arm. People chuckle as they pass and look at me with teasing glares.
“I don’t need all of Queens knowing my personal business, Anna.” I threaten pinching her arm as I feel warmth rush to my cheeks. She smacks my hand away and rubs at the spot where I squeezed her.
“Alright. Alright! You big brute. Who is it? Why are you getting married?” she says in a more hushed voice.
“My father doesn’t think I can take care of the two of us by myself. He can’t work and he doesn’t want me to get a job. ‘no daughter of mine will be working’ so instead he went and cornered one of his friends’ son and asked him to marry me.” I say suddenly very unconcerned with what the passersby might think.
“Oh my goodness, Ruthy! I would have had a fit. That’s the most embarrassing thing I’ve ever heard.” She says patting my arm.
“He agreed. I don’t know why, but he agreed, and now I’m living with a complete stranger because my Dad thinks we need time to know each other before the wedding.” I say throwing as much sarcasm and hate into the sentence.
“Oh, well, he doesn’t say! I agree, but he does know that usually the ‘getting to know each other’ is done before people get married right?” She says and I sigh exasperated with my dad and the way his mind works.
We cross the street onto a busy walking road that leads to the ice cream shop we agreed to go to. Anna and I have always gone to the same ice cream shop together when in crisis. We talk about what’s bothering us on the way and eat ice cream at the parlor to calm us down afterword.
“Ruth! There isn’t enough ice cream in the world that could help this. Can’t you get out of it? Work in secret.” She suggests and I press my palm to my forehead.
“I thought of that before this whole situation happened. I worked at the linen shop near this neighborhood; not too long before my father came waltzing in and saw me folding sheets. He turned red in the face and yelled at me so badly I cried in front of everyone in the shop.” I say as we turn the corner. I see Pinks in the distance and my heart grows lighter.
“Oh, Ruth. I’m so sorry.” Anna says and she puts her arm around me, and though it’s an awkward position; I put my head on her head as he walk to the ice cream shop. “You know. If you ever wanted to leave you could. You aren’t married to him yet.” Anna says as she opens the door to the shop for me.
“I can’t leave my Dad, Anna. Though I hate to admit it, my dad is right. I can’t support the both of us on a couple of cents from a linen store. It would take a while for me to get anything that would pay for more than a sandwich let alone bills and living.” I say in defeat.
The ice cream shop seems to bright today for my mood. The pink and white tiles and the light yellow of the scooping counter tells me I should be happy to be here. I am. I am happy to be here with Anna, but these problems I have they seem too big for a pint of ice cream to cure.
“Ruth! Anna! Haven’t seen you two around here. Where you been? Hugging booze bottles instead of ice cream pints now, I bet.” Frank says and I smile as I see his absurdly thin form put on a pair of gloves.
“Oh, Frank you know alcohol is banned!” Anna says swiping her hand at the air in font of him.
“They don’t got it in the stores, Annie. No one says you can’t drink it!” He laughs loudly making us both laugh, “What’ll you two girls be having then, and should I say ladies now?”
“Yes, you should. I’ll have a vanilla cone with sprinkles.” Anna says and I laugh as Frank puts up a hand in play defense. This place never changes. I was afraid it might not be the same after four years, or worse, that Frank might have left. It brings me so much relief to know that in some places in my life things ar the same.
“What about you Ruth?” He asks as he is done scooping out velvety white spheres into a waffle cone.
“Just a chocolate ice cream in a cup.” I say and the two stare at me.
“She’ll have a pint of that to go as well as some walnuts on that.” Anna says as Frank hands her her ice cream.
“Coming right up!” Frank says scooping ice cream into a bowl for me.
“Wait a minute! Why are you ordering for me?” I say trying to stop Frank from adding anything to my ice cream.
“I’ll pay for it Ruth. You’re just so boring.” Anna says and I smack her arm almost sending her ice cream into her nose.
“You’re the one who chose to eat vanilla ice cream. You might as well be wearing beige and attending knitting club.” I say and she shoves me over and we both laugh.
“No fighting in my ice cream shop! It’s bad for business.” Frank says handing me my ice cream cup and pint.
“Thank you, Frank.” I say and he winks at me. He must be able to tell I’m feeling down.
“You girls have a good day. Come by more often I might forget your faces!” He says and we assure him that we will.
“Bye Frank!” I say waving good bye.
“Thanks a bunch!” Anna shouts as we walk out the door.
We walk down the paved streets eating our ice cream and somehow I do feel better. The chocolate covers my tongue in sweet and bitter flavor that I can never get over. The walnuts, though I won’t tell her, were a nice addition to my cup. Maybe I’ve come to terms with the fact that I’m getting married, and there is nothing I can do about it now, or maybe the ice cream has calmed me into submission. Whatever it may be I smile at Anna as we sit in the park and talk.
“You know.” I say crossing my legs and looking out at the people walking by. There are couples holding hands. Children trotting along making a fuss beside women and men. I’m going to miss the thought of all this, “I don’t want to get married. I wanted to find a man I loved and who loved me and have children with him. I wanted a little house where we could have a boy and a girl and raise them together.”
I see Anna through the corner of my eyes and I can tell she’s looking at me with all the pity in the world. I don’t care. I look at all the people passing by, and I wonder if they chose their fates as well. If some of them had to do things they didn’t want to for the greater good.
“I don’t care anymore. I’ll get married. I’ll do whatever it takes to keep my father alive and healthy. He wants me to get married so I can be happy.” I wipe the tears from my eyes, and Anna wraps her arm around me rubbing my shoulder softly.
“You were happy Ruth.” Anna says to me and it hurts like a brick to my chest.
“I was.” I say residing myself to everything.
I was happy. I was happy with my mother gone. I was happy to take on the responsibility of care taker, because it was him. I was a child. A child playing doctor and I couldn’t take care of him. I can’t provide for him the way he did me, and if I could he wouldn’t want me to.
“I’m getting married Anna.” I say pushing her away softly and puffing up my chest. If there’s going to be a wedding I’m damn well going to enjoy it! I’m going to dance and eat until I pass out from exhaustion and no one is going to stop me. I don’t plan on doing it again after all.
“I know.” She says looking at me exasperatedly. If it were up to her she would have me cry all day.
“So, there is only one question that matters right now.” I say standing up and smiling at her. I must look wicked because she looks at me like I’ve lost my damn mind. I don’t blame her.
“What’s that? She says slowly getting to her feet.
“Where am I going to get my wedding dress?” I say a wide smile on my face.
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