Everything about life became theoretical. I paced the world in a stupor, trying to figure out the true meaning behind my recent experiences at the stronghold. The voice in my head was mostly quiet but I felt like I had formed some kind of special bond with the heart stone. But why was that?

I had a theory - well, I still have a theory, and I hope to figure it all out soon. I'm making progress, however. See, back then I thought that maybe this was a magical place for me to go when the weight of the world fell upon me in such a way that I would either explode or implode, and the fortress was where I would go to isolate myself for the good of those around me. Not bad, right? Then why did that voice promise to protect me? If I was the danger, what good would it do to protect me from them? Shouldn't it have been the other way around?

There were too many lingering questions.

Me: [stressed] Come on, Adam, you're smarter than that. THINK!

I racked my brain for answers but I ended up just spinning my wheels. The truth was that I didn't have enough information to figure everything out. I had to get back so I could find out more.

Oh, you already know I was right around the corner from going back naturally. I didn't have to wait long for the chance. I had some loans out that hadn't been paid back. Well, without me even trying, that quickly caused problems. Remember, if you will, that I was trying to get money to help Mom pay the bills and cover the rent. It wasn't simple loans though, I was loan sharking. I loaned out money for profit. It was easy, I'd loan $150, they'd bring me back $175 when they paid me back. I'd grant these loans 5 times per day and I'd get back $125 in total. If I did this every day of the week, I profited $875 per week. Not bad, eh?

How did I fund the venture? Robbing. I would break into vehicles and homes, steal whatever I could, then sell it hand-to-hand to the highest bidder. Video game console? Sell it for a $100 discount. Name brand sweater? That went for 50% off to people who liked to stunt at the clubs and bars. Sneakers? They could have those for a third of the price. It was all free money to me, so I found it worth the time and energy to choose a different mark each night.

Now you might be thinking that wasn't enough to start loan sharking right away. Except it was, as it was the remainder of what I needed to loan out that kind of money so frequently. Not only was I stealing and reselling thousands of dollars worth of goods each night, I was also being paid to flex muscle on some less than favorable individuals. It was usually a bit of pressure from another loan shark to pay. I applied that pressure. With my hands and feet.

It didn't stop there. I was back to selling drugs too. I'd double my money with every drop. I wasn't busting heads with the price, just breaking the work down right. I sold pills, found dealers a few crack addicts and cokeheads for a finder's fee, and sold herb. That was a lot to do for one person but I was getting money. If I bought $1000 worth of product each week, I was earning that back with an additional $1000 in profit. Do the math. That's $1875 per week! That's $7500 per dictionary month! I was on the course to profit up to $97500 per year without even including the theft and, uh, debt collections. Fuck the legal trouble, who says crime doesn't pay? Now, slap that person. Yes, it does.

Of course I didn't handle all the profits properly. I spent and gave away a lot - especially to girls my age. Over here, we call that tricking dough, and I was one of the biggest tricks around. Yeah, I fucked up. I could have bought Mom a house and got us out the hood but I was busy wasting money. However, the bills got paid on time and the stress around there was dramatically reduced. The house had become a lot more peaceful despite my flawed judgment. To be truthful, the neighborhood itself was quieter after I started throwing all that money around. I ran my section like a boss and the set was making a killing. We converted that whole zip code.

I'm sure you're dying to know what happened with those loans that caused me to make a return trip to solitary. Well, I've got you covered. A friend at the time borrowed $300. That shouldn't have been a problem, though, right? I hand him $300, he returns with $350. Simple. Did he do that? No. He returned with nothing but another request for a loan. Now he was supposed to be borrowing this money to get on. This was supposedly seed money for his own little business venture. What he told me was his plan to buy this new herb gaining popularity at the time and get in on the ground floor. That was a solid plan for street pharmaceuticals. Except he didn't do it.

Much to my chagrin, I found out second hand - a week after his payment was due - that he fucked off the whole $300 on a girl he was trying to sleep with. Excuse me, what? I couldn't believe my ears. Suffice it to say I wasted no time or opportunity to act a fool when this snake came back to ask for more money and lied to my face.

Garden Snake: [mumbling] Hey, bro. Listen, some things didn't go as planned. The price went up by the time I got there and I need another drop in order to get on. You got me?

Me: So, the price was actually $450?

Garden Snake: [mumbling] Naw, it was $300 for me but it was going fast. Demand was higher than initially planned so the new price went up to $450. They still got me on the low because it's really supposed to be $600.

I raised my brow at him. He was really committed to this lie and I couldn’t believe he had convinced himself that I was buying the bullshit he was selling me, with his lying ass.

Garden Snake: [mumbling] Why you looking like that, bro? Just let me get the money and I got you on the first of the month. That’s when my momma gets paid and she’s giving me a stack so I can start shopping for prom. I’m going to this prom AND our prom next year.

Me: Fam, I already know you’re lying to me.

Garden Snake: [mumbling] No, I’m not. I swear on my granny.

Me: Nigga, you don’t even like your granny and she don’t like you. Swearing on her don’t mean a DAMN thing to me. Listen, you aren’t getting another dime from me until you pay up. I already know you tricked off my money on some bitch you were trying to fuck. I’m not stupid. I got the pictures of you out with her, smoking her out, you were all in a new outfit, and flossing at Red Lobster with the cheddar biscuits and shit. Let me give you a forecast of what’s going to happen if you’re stacking lies. If your mom doesn’t get paid by the first, and you don’t get that grand you claim she promised you, and you don’t find yourself handing me $350 of that supposedly promised money, I’m going to break your face with my fist. Then I’m going to fuck your big sister and cut your mom’s brakes, do I make myself perfectly clear?

Garden Snake: [mumbling] Yo, you ain’t about to do--

Me: Let me stop you before you fuck up, homie, because you fail to comprehend the weight of the situation you’re in. You’re a bad friend, which means you aren’t a real friend at all. Now, we’re in high school, so I let you get away with a lot of fake shit. I know you sold me out to get rank up here, and the only reason I’m up here is to make a point. I run this shit, I haven’t apologized for shit, I’m not going to apologize for shit, you owe me money and you’re not safe anywhere in the city before you pay me my money, all these motherfuckers sitting around us ain’t shit and can’t do shit to save you, and here are the photos of you flossing with my bread. I’m not in the mood for games. If you make this any more stressful for me, I will make you dead. Did you understand THAT?

My right hand snapped to my back pocket. I kept several pocket knives on me at all times during the day. I wasn’t the type to get caught slipping anymore, I caught other people slipping. The knife I was carrying that day was a couple of inches longer than what was legal. It was more of an antique I had picked up from one of my robberies. Oh, it was in pristine condition too. I didn’t really want to get it dirty but I was willing to clean it if I had to give this boy a buck-fifty. I was already taller than him and had the bigger knife. Well, the only knife. He got caught slipping. See what I mean? His knife wasn’t only shorter, it was in his locker. I had two in my locker and three on me during that conversation.

He saw my the muscles in my arm tense as I gripped my knife behind me. He wasn’t sure whether I had a knife or a gun, and he was honestly afraid to find out. What he knew was he would have a VERY bad day if he kept testing me.

Garden Snake: Alright! Chill, man, it ain’t gotta get like that! I’ll get your money!

BINGO!!! Without even thinking about it, I woke up outside the stronghold later on that night. I started to wonder why I was also waking up outside something that was supposedly to protect me. Strange. Anyway, I looked up at the monstrous building. The outermost walls expanded to house battlements, the innermost chamber moved up to the third level and had a domed roof, the whole structure was even larger, and there were multiple completely sealed entrances. This thing dared someone to find it but I was the only one who had by then.

I came to next to what I later learned was the main gate. It was the largest of five and the only French style. The monster had changed shape, becoming a pentagon. It had five exterior walls at that point. There was one entrance on each wall. I know because I explored before I went in.

The structure was so huge that night that it nearly reached the forest line that encircled the gargantuan clearing. Without batting an eye, I slipped inside after running my usual lap around it. It was like something out of an anime. I didn’t have to stumble around in the dark for hours anymore, I was able to appreciate some actual light finally. There were torches attached high up on the inner walls. There were no windows, so there was no way of knowing before any of the gates opened. Oh! Guess what other nice upgrade I got in there.

I FINALLY HAD A MOTHERFUCKING FLOOR! HELL YEAH, MAN! I WAS HYPE AS HELL!

They were rough but they were mine. Tune in next time to learn what I find. See you next week!