So I just came back from Vermont, where I didn't have access to a computer so I'm writing now to make up for it. Since I can't think of anything lighthearted to talk about, I'll just tell you more about myself. Just a warning though: my past/present is pretty dark and includes lots of heavy topics, so if you don't want to read about that then skip this. So going to my past first, I had a pretty difficult childhood. However, I had two parents who cared about me and were financially stable, I had a place to live, I always had enough food to eat and clothes to wear, and I had lots of people that cared about me. And I am forever grateful for those things. But there are some things about myself that I was born with and can't help, but I didn't realize that as a little kid. I was always scolded for being too slow or not paying attention in class, and for a long time I blamed myself for that. I thought that if everyone else could do everything so easily I should also be able to. I told myself that I wasn't trying hard enough. That's when I started to really develop depression and self hatred. I know now that I have and have always had ADHD, but I didn't know for a long time. My parents fought a lot when I was in elementary food. My mom would come home from work super stressed out, see that I had barely started my homework, and yell and scream at me until I cried. My parents disagreed about pretty much everything, so they would constantly argue over what was best for me without thinking to ask about what I thought was best for me. One time when I was at an after school program, one of the teachers said that she noticed that I had been acting different lately and asked me what was wrong. So I told her about how my parents constantly argued and how much it concerned me. She asked me "Have they ever hit each other?" I said no, and she said "Well, that's good then, a girl told me once that her mom threw an entire Christmas tree at her dad, but that's not happening with your parents. Every couple fights sometimes, it's just normal. Your parents are fine." I know that she was trying to be helpful, but that only made me feel worse because I knew the problem was bigger than that, but according to the teacher it couldn't be a problem if there was no physical hurting going on. Unsurprisingly, my parents eventually got divorced. They had been married for almost exactly 17 years. I said to my mom that I was worried that the problems between them had been my fault. My mom said it wasn't my fault, and if I hadn't been born they would've gotten divorced sooner. This did not make me feel better because I knew they had had an unhealthy relationship for a very long time, and now I knew that they only stayed in that toxic relationship because they were concerned about me. This is it for now. Sorry that wasn't funny.