"That's just perfect," I heard Toby say. I paused, feeling my face warm up as I stared at my painting in front of me. We were in the park together. Toby had invited me to 'hang out' like he'd put it in his text message. I had been taken aback when I'd received it, but I'd tumbled out of my bed regardless of how early in the day it was and got dressed before leaving to meet up with him. It was like Toby could tell I was still grieving and was trying to cheer me up.

"Thanks," I mumbled, turning towards him to find him smiling — it was soft and seemed kind of relieved. I let my eyes move from him to his painting, observing the composition of a fairy playing a pipe on a tree branch. Toby was doing his work in poster color while I worked with the acrylic paint I had brought with me.

"You're smiling, that's a relief," he said as his smile widened. I blinked before I touched the edge of my mouth to see that I'd indeed been doing that. I felt my face warm up again, realizing how moody and depressed I'd been for the past week.

"Yeah..." I trailed, not really knowing how to reply to his statement. We continued to paint, and Toby's dog busied itself with sniffing at our tubes of paints and the flowers by the nearby bushes. It also laid on the grass to take breaks. Soft music from Toby's music player filled the void, and since it was quite early in the day — just nearing noon, not a lot of kids were in the park yet.

"You said something about stickers a week ago," Toby said, making me frown a bit as I wondered when that was until it came to me. The memory made me a bit sad since it had been the day Toby had told me why exactly he's rejected me and was still going to reject me. To be honest, the stickers were a very small bit of the memory that was now dancing in my mind.

"Yeah," I muttered, hoping my voice didn't sound choked. Toby was trying to cheer me up, I should save the waterworks for later. "I like them," I added, biting my bottom lip as I continued to touch the background of my painting with bright red.

"Would you like me to give you some? I have a handful in my apartment that I've gotten from things like cereal promotions and gift packs. I didn't think much of them until I came across a few while cleaning up my apartment yesterday," he said, making me turn to him. He had his eyes on his painting, and the hand that held his brush moved in swift motions to distribute equal amounts of paint across the piece's background.

"Oh, okay," I said, looking back at my work. "You'll bring them to school with you?"

I turned to find him frowning a bit. He'd paused painting, and was now running a few fingers through his brown locks. "You should come and get them from my apartment. It's right next to the LRT station so you could go home straight away afterward, how about that? Or do you prefer getting them in school?"

I let myself think about his offer, trying to keep away thoughts that didn't have much to do with convenience, but my personal interest. I wanted to go to his place to get them because that meant I wouldn't have to wait — okay, maybe it was because I wanted to see what his place looked like.

"I'll come pick them up then," I muttered, watching as he smiled before nodding. We continued painting, engaging in small talk as the sun came up from behind the clouds it had been hiding behind. It soon became warmer as it shifted from early to late noon, and the park became noisier as kids began to fill the playground with their caregivers.

"I think we should leave now," Toby said as he took his painting down from its stand. He put it aside, before picking up his stand and dismantling it. "The kids sometimes come over and ask me to paint their faces..." he trailed with a laugh. "I don't want to deal with their parents."

"Oh," I said, not knowing how to reply to that. I watched him put the pieces of his stand into its carrier bag before I decided to pack up too. When we were both done Toby whistled for Duke. The dog came running out of the bushes covered in blades of grass. Toby laughed at the sight, bending over to pick them out of the dog's dark fur.

I followed Toby and his dog to the parking lot, getting into the front passenger seat of his car as he started it. Soft music started to play on the radio as he adjusted the gear and drove out into the main road. I could feel my heart pounding in my chest as he drove. I tried to concentrate on keeping my eyes on the road so that I wouldn't freak out from my anxiousness.

Toby's laugh filled the car when I jumped away from the window at the feeling of something touch my neck. I blinked, turning to find his dog sticking its tongue through the space between the headrest and the seat.

"Did he lick your neck? Aww," Toby said in a series of chuckles as I ran a hand against the back of my neck. I didn't answer him, I just turned away as my face got warmer. The ride continued, and Toby soon slowed down when we got to a row of red brick apartment buildings that was just a street crossing away from the LRT station like he'd said. He drove into the parking lot of one, pulling the gear on break when he'd gotten his car into a free spot.

"Come on," Toby said as the radio went off with the car engine. I watched him get out of the car, before walking over to help his dog out of the back seat. I got down from the car as well, helping him carry his stand's bag as he held on to his bag of supplies. I followed him into the building, and up the stairs to the fourth floor where his apartment was. Standing awkwardly, I let myself look around as he went about getting his front door open. The walls around were painted in a pale cream color, and the condition of the floor and roof above made me know the place was old enough to be my great grandparent.

When I was done looking around I turned to find him smiling at me. The door clicked open as he turned his key in the lock. He then walked into the apartment with his dog on his tail, and I followed him inside as well, closing the door behind me.

It was a small place. The kitchen and the living room were in the same area and were just divided by a different flooring. The kitchen area was tiled, and the living room area was carpeted. I stood in the living room area, not knowing what to do as I watched Toby disappear through the door that led to a small hallway to drop his bag.

Restless, I let my gaze follow the dog when it let out a yawn while walking past me. It walked towards the sofa at the corner, climbing onto it before settling down. I smiled a bit, turning away and allowing myself to walk around the room. It was then I noticed the hoard of canvas' laying against the walls that were decorated with Aztec patterned wallpaper. The canvas' were turned to their backs, so I couldn't see the artwork on them.

That's a lot. I thought, wondering if it would be okay for me to turn them around to look at the artworks.

"Hey, here they are." I turned to see Toby walking out the hallway with a small carton box in his hand. I muttered a small 'thanks' before walking towards him to take it. There was an odd silence as I opened the box to look through the stickers he'd put inside. They were old — most of them being promotional stickers that you'd probably get in gift packs or product promos — like a special edition toy or something you had to find in cereal boxes.

"Thank you," I repeated, looking up to find him smiling at me. He ran a hand through his dark brown hair, looking over at the section of the room that served as a kitchen.

"I'm glad you like them. Do you want to have something to eat before you leave? I have mac and cheese I could warm up if you're interested." I thought about his offer for a while, turning my gaze back to the stickers in the box I was holding. Yes, I wanted to stay for a little more time.

"Sure," I soon found myself saying in response. I looked up again to find him nodding with a smile before he walked away towards the kitchen area and then to his fridge.

Should I help him? I wondered as I watched him dish out the mac and cheese into two separate plates. He then picked them up before heading over to his microwave and putting them in. I looked away when the opportunity to implement my thoughts passed.

"You can sit down you know," he laughed when he turned to still find me standing at the center of the room. I found myself flushing at the attention he was directing at me. I looked away, shaking my head a bit at that. I heard footsteps, and soon his laughter was much closer — right by my ear. I soon felt the touch of his hand on my shoulder, which made me look up to his laughing face.

"You're very odd." He's been saying that a lot lately now, but I really couldn't pinpoint what he meant by it — but he always smiled when he said it, and I loved his smile too much to think about anything else.

"It's a good odd, don't worry," he said with a small chuckle, his dimples on full display. He then let go of my shoulder before walking past me to the sofa that his dog was still laying on. I watched him cradle the dog on his lap, and I only made to join him when he motioned to the empty space beside them that he'd created.

I sat there, shaking a bit as I tried to calm my nerves. I attempted to do that by watching the show that was playing on the TV in front of us, but my mind my completely clouded by his mere presence — nearness. His laugh, his smile, the warmth that filled my body whenever he'd mistakenly bump his hand or thigh against me. My mind was stuck between the abyss of feeling guilty for my feelings that had already been dismissed and rejected, and another part was relieved and touched that he was allowing me to be this close to him after everything.

How can I not love him?

We ate the mac and cheese when it was done warming up, and we watched the auditions for some talent show. I left his apartment and headed home when I was done eating and washing the dish I'd used. Though, I didn't stop thinking of his place even after I'd gotten back home. It had been everything I'd expected it to be. Small, cozy, artsy — typical Toby.