Dear #2,

I know we had our struggles and I'm really glad you stuck it out with me. You were one of my first real friends and I wasn't really sure how to act.

Letter 2:

I'm sorry. That I'm so mood and more moody. I know it being THAT time of the month isn't really a good excuse, but I don't think that I have ever been this moody. You've got me feeling so amazing lately. I really like you Paul. I'm starting to like you so much that it's scaring me. You mean a lot to me and while I know it hasn't been easy gaining my trust, you did it anyway. You have me wrapped around your finger. I'm still scared to trust you though. It's not you. 

I remember that day at my old school when I was sitting on a bench in the lobby thanking God for allowing me to be there. It was an expensive private school, but it was my current dream school with all my friends. I worked really hard to get myself known there. I needed to make a name for myself so I would be assured a scholarship the next year. The next year I was supposed to be the head trainer, captain of the varsity soccer team, a campus ministry leader, and still only a Sophomore! I had the next 3 years planned out and scholarships basically assured. I can't even begin to explain how grateful I was to be there with every one. I loved my friends more than anything, heck I still do; we had been through so much together. If they ever needed me I'd show up in a heartbeat, yet I began to wonder if they would do the same. I felt something changing. They began to hang out with different people, changing their hobbies, talking different, acting different, they began heading in directions I knew weren't for me. I felt stuck. I couldn't even tell them what I was feeling because that isn't how they saw "me." I tried so hard to follow them and belong, but no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't. So instead of facing the problem, I decided it would be best to just run away. I had an unthinkable option on my mind, but I could have never followed through. So instead, I switched schools.