POV: Maddison

I can't believe she actually wants to talk to me. She actually called me. I'm so nervous. She said she's done with Rey, does that me she wants to get back together? No, I can't jump to conclusions. Maybe she just has something to say to me.

She looks rough. Dark bags under her eyes make her usually sweet sugar brown eyes, look dark and dull. She is pale and thin, has she been eating? Also, her skin looks dry, just like her hair. She actually looks her age, if not older.

"Hey Maddy," she smiles at me.

She caresses my face and I can't help but lean into her touch. I've missed her touch. I grab her hand in my own and interlock our fingers. She pulls me close and I bury my head into her. I've missed this, I've missed this so much it hurts. There is this aching pain in me that always feels better when she is near.

"Scarlet I'm worried about you," I say into her.

"Stop that, stop being the mature one. You only make me feel worse." She says into my hair and she smushes her face to my head.

"I'm sorry, I don't want you to feel bad. I just really miss you."

"Me too." She whispered so softly I struggled to hear it.

For a moment we just stood still. So close to each other that I could hear her heart beating. I never wanted the moment to end, I just wanted to stay close to her forever. To be with her again, to hold her and kiss her, I want it so bad.

Sadly, she pulled away.

"To be honest I don't even know why I called you here, I guess..." She pauses to chuckle and walk towards her bedroom.

I quickly follow her.

"I guess I just needed to see you." She says.

"You can see me whenever you want. All you have to do is call and I'll come, I promise." I said.

"My life is such a goddamn wreck right now." She runs her hands through her hair.

I sit next to her on the bed.

"Oh who the hell am I kidding, my life has always been a fucking wreck. I just want to drink myself into a coma." She admits.

"What's wrong, tell me." I place my hand on her thigh.

"You, you did this to me. My life was a wreck and I used to be okay with it, then you fucking show up and I just can't think straight anymore! For the first time in my life, I didn't need someone to babysit me and make sure I had my shit together. You gave me a reason to be a better person. You make me feels things no other person has ever made me feel. I... I fell for you. Hard. And I don't know what's more fucked up, the fact that I fell in love with a fucking 16-year-old. Or the fact that I can't get my shit together and I used to be okay with that. I used to love drinking my life away, now... now I don't even know."

She is weeping. Not crying, not silent tears, she is weeping. Soft painful sounding sobs, tears just falling out of her eyes quickly. I feel my own tears fall just watching her.

She's like this because of me, because of what I did to her.

This is all my fault.

"I'm sorry," I say.

"Don't you dare fucking apologize to me. You're 16! You're allowed to make mistakes. You are allowed to learn and grow up. That's what being a teenager is all about. I'm the one who's fucked up, I'm the one trying to hold some young girl back from becoming the woman she is supposed to be. I'm the one who is pathetic and disgusting. Me, not you. Now here I am venting to my fucking student."

"Stop it! You're not pathetic or disgusting. You feel in love, that's not a bad thing."

"It is when I fell in love with a fucking kid!"

"Scarlet look at me I am 16, going on 17. I'm not a kid. I was 12 when I started watching porn and masturbating. I haven't exactly been an innocent kid for a long time. I started this remember, I wanted you, I went after you, not the other way around. You are not a predator, I wanted to be with you, I still do. There is nothing wrong with falling in love."

"Stop lying! If you really loved me, if you really wanted to be with me then why the hell did you cheat on me!" she stood and shouted down at me.

"I don't know!" I stood and shouted back.

"It's because you don't love me, and maybe you never did." she turned away.

"Stop being dramatic. I do love you, I do!"

"No. You don't, you cheated..."

"I fucked up okay, I admit it, but so did you. We've been through this already. If you really love me then why did you flirt with Reyna, why did you have phone sex with her? Why start dating her right after we broke up? Someone in love doesn't do that!"

"I just felt so empty, like you ripped my heart out and a giant hole was left behind. I wanted someone to hold, I wanted someone to hold me. Because I need someone to hold me together or I start to fall apart again. I needed her, because now that she's gone look at what I've become. Everything fell out of place, everything fell apart. My best friend almost sent me back to rehab. My mom is enrolling me in therapy. What kind of woman am I if I still need my mom to do something as simple as make me a doctor's appointment? If I need my best friend to scrape me off the floor and my ex-boyfriend to stop some dude from taking advantage of my drunken stupor. Don't you see... I don't know why, but I guess I never grew up. I'm just a helpless kid who needs someone to hold her together."

She leans against the wall and slides down to the floor. Seeing her like this is killing me, I just want to slap her and snap her out of it, but somehow I feel like that won't work this time.

"I hate myself." She says.

"I love you." I sit down in front of her.

"No, you don't."

"I do. Why do you hate yourself?"

"there so many reasons, but what triggered all of this," she gestures to herself, "is because you cheated on me. You made me hate myself because I wasn't enough for you. or maybe I was too much or something. Something about me wasn't right and so you cheated on me. that's it right? that's why you did it. because I'm not good enough."

"No. You want to know why I did it, I'll tell you. My friend was in need and I'm the kind of person that's always there when a friend needs them. She needed me and so I was there, things got hot and heated and I just wanted us both to feel good. I wanted a sexual release. It wasn't because I thought you were inadequate or that I loved her more than you, it was just me wanting to get off in an erotic and twisted way. Right after it was done, right after it happened, I felt sick to my stomach. I knew I fucked up. I knew if you ever found out it would destroy you, so I kept it a secret. It was the wrong move, okay, all of it was wrong. By the time I realized I was hurting you more by not telling you, it was too late. I should have just told you from the start, if I could go back I would. I would scarlet because I love you!"

She bangs the back of her head against the wall more tears just sliding down her face. Next to her is the present I made her, it's smashed up a little.

"You should go home." She says.

"What are you going to do?"

"Something stupid probably. Maybe... maybe I won't ever see you again. Maybe I'll go to rehab and then just move away after."

"No! I don't want that, and I know you don't want that either."

"I can't be with you right now Maddison, or even be around you. I'm not thinking clearly, I'm falling apart. I don't want to bring this mess back into your life. I need to get myself together I need to you know, try and do this on my own for once."

"You don't have to, I'm going to always be here. Even if we aren't together I'll still be your friend, you know I can help you. We can fight this together, I promise."

"Two teachers already know about us, if we are ever seen around each again it's over. For both of us. I don't want to bring you down with me, let me take this sinking ship down to the bottom of the ocean alone."

I crawl closer to her, forcing her to let me sit in her lap. Then I grab her face in my hands and wipe her tears. She weeps some more and takes a shaky breath, her hands find my own and she interlocks our fingers.

"I'll do whatever it takes for us to be in that happy place once more. I promise you I am not going to give up on us. I love you, Scarlet. I really do. The whole time I was without you I was miserable, I hardly ever came out of my room. I would sneak into your apartment and just lay in your bed and imagine you were laying next to me. I pretty sure that pillow on your bed soaked up so much of my tears it doubled in size. I know it hurts, trust me I know. But we can get through this together. I promise."

"No Maddy. I won't let you."

"I don't care what you say! If you need me you call me okay. You think you can't take it anymore; you ever want to reach for that bottle you call me and I'll be there. I don't care what anyone thinks about us. I don't. you are my friend and when a friend needs me, I'm going to always be there. I came here because I had to tell you something and that something is that I love you. I never stopped loving and if I have to run to hell and back to get you back then I will. I promise."

"You'd do that for me?"

"I'd do anything for you because I love you and you are worth it to me."

She pulls me into her arms and holds me close to her, I can hear her crying into my shoulder. I just hold her back and comfort her.

"And you're not a kid. Everyone needs a little help getting up when they are down. It's okay to need someone because I'm right here Scarlet. I'm right here."

She began to cry harder and held me tighter. It broke me to hear her like that, to see her like this. I've never seen her as bad as this before. I just want to take all her pain away and make her smile at me again. I love it when she smiled at me.

I'm going to do whatever it takes to get her back together in one piece. I want her to smile and laugh and be all fucking sexy and adorable again. I want us to be happy together again and I won't stop until I get what I want.

This badass bitch is going to help her girl, no matter what.

That's a promise.