“Shawn, you didn’t do anything wrong-”

“I’M SORRY FOR EVERY TERRIBLE FUCKING THING I’VE EVER CALLED YOU AND I-I DIDN’T MEAN ANY OF IT I’M JUST REALLY STUPID I LIKE YOU A LOT.”

Ashton was blown away that Shawn was so to the point usually he doesn’t say how much he likes him like oof.

He put his hand on his shoulder, “I love you too, babe.”

“OH MY GOD DON’T CALL ME bABe IF YOU DO IT AGAIN- UGHHHHH.”

He took off his hand, “sorry- I just-”

Shawn grabbed his hand tightly, “please don’t be sorry when I’m the one who makes everything worse.”

He looked at him worryingly, “Shawn, you don’t make everything worse… I’m just not used to a man like you yet.”

Shawn looked down, but his hand was still locking Ashton’s tightly, “I.... I want to say something, but I don’t know how to say it without sounding cringy and it’s making me wanna throw myself off a four story building.”

“You don’t have to say it just dance around it and maybe I’ll know what you’re talking about.”

“I… I feel stupid…”

Ashton is basically a therapist now, “why’s that?”

“Because… emotions…”

“What about emotion? Which emotion in particular?”

He glanced at Ashton for a second before standing up, “I’m done.”

“Wait Shawn- no-”

“This whole “dancing” thing isn’t working.”

“... wait what if I say it in a different way.”

He sat back down, “I’m listening…”

“What emotions isn’t it about?”

“Well it’s not about an emotion that makes me feel good…”

“That doesn’t really specify much but okay. Anger or sadness?”

He sighed, knowing this was gonna take a while, “no but those two do make me feel crappy, not cringy.”

“Fear or despair?”

“Fear causes sadness and despair is sadness come on dude get yourself together.”

He thought, “I’m sorry… I just don’t know what emotion could make you feel that way… unless it’s a good emotion, but you said it’s not one of those.”

“Well… it might make you feel good but it makes me feel icky. I shouldn’t be feeling it. It makes me feel all warm and red and gross and disgusting and ew ew ewie.”

“Wait is the emotion love?”

He blushed and covered his face.

“But shouldn’t love make you feel great and on cloud nine and all that stuff?”

And then he started crying, “n-not if you've been feeling it for years to the point where you feel guilty because the other person doesn’t even know you exist.” and then he ranted on but in Russian and I can’t speak another language for shit.

Ashton wrapped his arm around him, “Shawn… it’s okay… everything has been worth it because I love you back, right?”

“I-I guess but not feeling open enough to tell you everything I feel is the worst part of it all…”

“Babe… you can tell me anything. I love you too much to get mad over something stupid.”

“And I’ll do that later but for now I wanna get my ass outta this dump. Wait I need to pee.”

“First TMI second we can leave after you use the bathroom.”

He stood up, “and you said I could tell you anything,” he said in a mocking tone.

“Well you don’t have to tell me that you need to pee, just go to the bathroom.”

“Fine,” he rolled his eyes and walked to the bathroom.

Ashton went on his phone for a few minutes and then Shawn was out and ready to go.

“Hey.”

“What’s up,” he got off his phone and stood next to him.

“Y-ya know like… those really hard to get stuffed animals they sell here…?”

“You want one?”

“I fucking want one so bad.”

“Doesn’t everyone?” he chucked.

He furrowed his brow, “yeah but I don’t want one from here, I don’t want a cheap bear.”

“You want me to buy you one online?”

“No way, that’s even worse,” he crossed his arms.

Ashton started walking towards the car and Shawn followed, “well where do you wanna get the bear?”

“A place where I can feel it before I buy it.”

“Feel it? Like-”

“No you pervert, like the texture…a lot of the cheaper ones make me cringe.”

He walked up to the car and unlocked the doors, “okay… I don’t really get how you don’t like some textures like they’re all fine.”

Shawn opened the car door, starting to raise his tone of voice, “well some of them make my head hurt how about that!?”

“Okay…” he got into the driver’s seat and started up the car.

He got into the car as well, slamming the door behind him, “oh “ you can tell me anythinggggg” what a hypocrite… why can’t people just stick to their word?” he crossed his arms, looking out the window.

“Shawn, I’m not a hypocrite I just don’t know where you’re coming from. I’ve never dated someone like you.”

“And what? That’s terrible because anything out of the norm is demonized!?”

“No, it’s actually kinda cool. I’m just not used to it yet. It’s different.”

He looked confused, “really? Me not liking things is now cool?”

“Shawny, you know what I mean. Let’s go to the mall and get you a bear. But you have to be quiet alright? No hitting the seats.”

“Fine…” he sighed, damn he told Ashton way too much today.