“You will be given exactly 5 days to do something with your life, Gwen.”

As Angel finished his sentence, I finally understood what has been happening. 

I was sent here to meet Angel, who would bear me the news of this plan. And deducing from what he meant by 5 days, I could only picture something similar to reincarnation. However, as some questions were answered, more came to take their place.

“What do you mean by “do something”? Isn’t that just too vague of an instruction? What shoul-”

“There’s absolutely no way that I would know.”

Angel suddenly cut in, stopping my question short as if saying that he did not need to hear the rest of it. And somehow, he answered it correctly.

In all of my 17 years, I still do not know whether the things I have done was correct or wrong. And if I am clueless about my own, how could I expect someone else to not be? But...

That is exactly what was wrong.

If I still have no idea of what to do after 17 years, what would another 5 days mean? And the fact that I am here right now must mean that I have done things incorrectly.

Then... what should I...

“But there is one thing that I can say...”

While I was drowned within insecurity, Angel had a saddened look that filled his eyes. Yet while I was reflected within them, I did not feel pitied. Instead, with another one of his awkward smiles, he looked somewhat proud with who he was seeing. And through his crooked lips, he spelt with honesty,

“You aren’t wrong, Gwen.”

It was a statement that took me by surprise. Not because of his acceptance of me, but rather due to its silliness.

He, himself, stated that he does not know of what is considered to be correct or wrong. Thus, the reason as to why he cannot promise me nor advise me anything about what I should do.

Then why could he say such a thing?

To answer something that I question until the time of my death.

All he did was contradict himself.

But then...

Why do I feel ease?

I...

“And... If I say no?”

My voice trembled as if I was feeling cold. Because somehow, with an illogical statement, Angel put out the flame of my worry.

“Indeed, it is your choice.”

“There is no guarantee that things will change.”

And yet I desperately try to hold on to what I am accustomed to, scared to traverse through the uncertain.

“Yep. Not yet, at least.”

But Angel had the same look on his face as before.

“The only thing that has changed is you.”

“...”

And again, illogically, he put that out too.

“Don’t lie to yourself. You know that you want to “do something”.”

Angel then chuckled, confident that he was able to convince me as he noticed that my stance had only gotten weaker with each of his sentences.

“You don’t know me.”

And with my last feeble retaliation, I tried to defend my pride. But Angel was right. Even if I do not know what to actually do, I still feel that I want to do something about it.

“So... are you going to be my 509th case then?”

Putting the last nail in the coffin, or I might say, pulling out the last nail from the closed coffin, Angel asked one last question in confirmation.

“Heh, if given the chance, I would rather be the 509th case for another angel.”

“I would have chosen someone cuter if I also have the chance.”

“Thank you, Angel”

“It’s not a thank you that I want to hear.”

“Yes... I accept.”

“Could’ve done this waaaay sooner.”

Angel then raised his right hand slightly upwards. And immediately after, white light emitted right between me and Angel. For some particular reason, I understood that it was a sign that we had made a deal.

“Alright, that’s 5 days, 120 hours.”

“Understood. I’ll see you in 5 days.”

“Huh? I’ll see you? What do y-”

…

“She’s gone. We were too late.”

“Internal bleeding, major loss of blood, I'm even amazed that she held out for this long."

“Have we grabbed hold of this girl’s guardian?"

Huh? Am I... back?

Even though my vision was still filled with darkness, I managed to hear some chattery, suggesting that I was indeed alive. However, I was not fully sure as I was still unable to gather any information with my sight. Did Angel accidentally turn me blind with that light?

Fortunately, that did not seem to be the case as colors began to fill my vision. It was idiotic that I even would assume such a thing in the first place anyway. I guess anyone would become quite non-sensical when they suddenly come back to life.

“Uh, doc... you... might want to see this.”

“Hm?”

With my vision still a bit fuzzy, I see a figure of a man fully suited in medical gear approaching me. He then put his face near mine and had his eyes squint, observing the miracle carefully.

“Her eyes are opened... Nurse, immediately turn on the monitor!”

“Uh... R... Right!”

Just as surprised as the doctor, the nurse’s reaction seemed a tad delayed. 

The monitor the doctor was referring to is the generic heart rate monitor that you may often notice from popular mediums such as movies. It seems that they had turned it off after confirming my death.

Once one of the nurses had turned the monitor back on, a slight “beep” continuously sound in a timely manner.

“She IS alive. I’ve never seen this before.”

Neither have i. However, as unfamiliar as this was, the sensation was not that much different from waking up out of a long slumber.

“And look... All of her wounds have closed.”

And perhaps, that was the exact reason why this felt no different from waking up. For someone who just experienced death due to a crash incident, I was not able to detect any pain coming from my body.

“Can you hear me? Try to wink if you can.”

The doctor then tried to get another affirmation of my sudden recovery. However, rather than a mere wink, I decided to give the doctor something more certain.

“Are you okay? Isn’t it a bit too soon for you to sit?”

“Thank you. But I'm fine, doctor.”

“God, this is all but too quick to process.”

The doctor puts his hand against his forehead, a gesture which made me feel a bit remorseful. Maybe I should hold back a little bit. This was far from normal after all.

“Okay, but do you feel any pain of any sort?”

“No.”

“Dizziness perhaps? Any feeling of nausea?”

“No.”

The doctor continued to have a dialogue with me, questioning me about my condition. His expression was that a concerned man, mixed with confusion. And by his gesture, I felt a sense of gratitude. Even though the questions were getting quite repetitive, he was doing his job as how he should.

“Hahaha, okay. I give up.”

The doctor let out a laughter, sounding like it was due to frustration. Somehow, I understand it a little bit. He, who has studied and invested his life in this field of study, cannot seem to be able to grasp any understanding of the medical situation. While me, a high school student, had total knowledge of what was happening.

Then again, there was no amount of studies that could have prepared him for this.

“Well, get some needed rest. Uh, I'm not quite sure if you actually need some more rest. But, have them anyway. Immediately inform us if you feel something odd, okay? We will find a more comfortable room for you in the meantime.”

“Thank you, doctor.”

“You’re welcome.”

With that, the doctor turned around to exit through the door; the nurses following behind him. Just barely from the exit, the doctor then signaled one of the nurses to stay in the room, perhaps just to keep a check on me. With that, only me and one of the nurses were left in the operating room.

“Hi, do you perhaps need or want anything? Maybe a glass of water?”

“That would be nice, thank you.”

“Okay, please have a good night’s rest for now.”

Night? Ah, I just noticed that it was night already.

“And don’t worry, we are trying to get into contact with your guardian as soon as possible.”

“That sounds swell.”

With that exchange, the nurse exited the room. After quite a long day, it was the first time I finally had time for myself. And as too many things have happened in such a short span of time that I don’t know what should I do regarding my situation. Too many information was jumbled up within this brain of mine.

Mother...

To have a relative or a close one beside you in times of distress is surely assuring. Therefore, it is common sense for the nurse to tell me that information as a tool to comfort. And truthfully, I do want to see mother.

But a sliver of doubt remained as I do not know how she felt in accordance. And presumably, her current absence may translate to what I had been fearing. However, assumptions are just that. It is not because there lies a possibility that affection has never been present. Rather, it is the fact that I cannot see nor predict anything.

Perhaps, that is why humans may be terrified by darkness. Not to be horrified by the dark itself, but the endless possibility that could live within the unseen. Yet within all the things I cannot view nor comprehend, there is one thing that my eyes had adjusted to.

There is something I want to change.