In the early evening, a sedan chair stopped at the Magistrate residence. It was the best house in the entire town, tall and familiar to her. She knew this place, for she grew up in it. Even as it was now occupied by a virtual stranger. The only thing which was common was their shared blood, something that she knew was barely there.
Not when these were the same people who cast her aside when she was first born, and also let her adoptive mother take the full brunt of raising her. And then choosing to reap it once she was considered a legal adult with all sorts of rights conferred and given to her. And when she was right for marriage at the very least.
But of course, she knew that it was not possible for them to think about it right now. They could force her, into a marriage against her own will. And she may or may not have met her fiance, who was not old, but a young scholar, perhaps just slightly older. Which didn’t matter nearly as much as say if he was a thirty year old man now, who was twice her age very very much.
He was not that, even as she guessed that he was twenty at most. And she walked into the courtyard and entering the entrance meant for women. It was best to be avoided as much as possible, and many knew that she was going to sit down upon the feast meant for them. Alone and without any help.
She didn’t even know what to do. Zhao’en was not a woman and thus excluded, since she knew that children often ate separate. Since the small rooms at the top were all taken up by one family, who often invited all of their family together. Only theirs were so huge, since only they could afford to have that many children at least at this point.
With farmers and any commoners who were not merchants or rich enough to have more than one have only one wife. But only scholars could pick up more than one wife, if they were rich enough to. Or merchants who converted. When they needed it right now much more than before.
Inside, were all of them seated. Her stepmother, who only sat there once. With no concubines either, and sitting at the top was none other than her grandmother. Not an unusual choice here, since the older she was the more respected she was accorded. That by being a mother, of an Emperor gave her more rights than any other time. Allowing her to reign and also rule on his behalf, as long as their heir was the accepted one right now.
When they needed it a lot more, and she took the most junior seat. Never seeing her more than just being a daughter of a concubine, as much as it pained her to think of it that way if at all. That despite being married with the rites of a first wife, but yet here she was. As well as how she was treated, cast aside when useful and brought it when necessary.
Without any care of the way it destroyed her life, or even what they were bringing her out of. This was not anything which they needed to do so right now much more than before.
Food was being served here before her, and she picked up the chopsticks. Or at least tried to see if anyone else was eating, before placing it back. Knowing the rite, just as it was rare. Only in the first few days of the new year did she eat like a family, otherwise it was a shared supper. Where they ate it together, often smaller since she was getting older and needing to watch what she ate a lot more.
She waited for the oldest and the others to eat before she did. Knowing that here it was fully dependent on when they ate, and then she started to it. The meal she ate quietly with her head down and simply not drawing attention to herself, she could not wait to be lost. She could not wait to leave as she was alone here and hopelessly unaware of what was happening or at least going along.
Once she did, she simply gave a slight smile before finding some way to leave. Careful to avoid it and out to the gardens where she was no longer there, maybe hoping to find something to do.
“So, we meet again.” Where he gave a slight wink when he came here, holding the same fan. Except dressed in a much better set of robes. While remembering what they said to each other. With no way to confirm. “And you must hate it.”
“Well, when you are ignored and expected to just close your mouth amongst strangers. Who make you feel as though letting you in is an honor itself, I kind of think that it is a little too much and overboard. At least in the restaurant I was paid for such behavior, but not here. In fact, it is as though they are bestowing upon me some great honor that I must thank them for.”
“Maybe you should attend more of this and then write them. You’ll offend many, but most of us would also agree on how true it is. Or at least through the eyes of a commoner who was thrust into such a situation.” He took the chance to mostly laugh, out of an incredible amount of humor.
“Like I care. If it makes me no longer marriageable then I’ll leave, not as though I’ll leave.”
“So you don’t want to get married?”
She shrugged her own shoulders, it was true to say that she did not want. “It’s not that, but I have no honest opinion. It isn’t fair, but it does give me plenty of things over the other. And it is something that I might consider, perhaps in the near future. Right now, I’m not so sure.”
“Well, pity for you but they hope that we marry within the next few months. And already have been looking for a good auspicious date.”
“What about you?”
“The least changes for us before and after marriage.” Keeping their surname, even as girls were usually not invested and only cared for the children they could bear. And assuring that most would mot be capable or show the wisdom. Even as many could agree that it was far from the case. “Even though as people get older, it most certainly does not mean that they get wiser.”
“So, you think that wisdom does not apply to age?”
“People have the chance of gaining it because they have the experience, but would I listen to any old man just because he has an age bigger than mine. No, not when you’re running an empire. You should know your opinions yourself and then work from there.”
As much as she could guess that perhaps he had the opposite sort of issue, always distrusted or perhaps told to listen to older people. To simply push aside. “There is truth, but honestly I feel as though sometimes the decisions they make for us simply make a horrible cycle.”
“Oh?”
“The idea of arranging marriages itself is one which many deem as necessary, just as so many of such unions become dispassionate, loveless. And those with love are sometimes condemned, others barely accepted as binding. And yet creates the situation where we’re in, bind us as teenagers instead of adults. Or just young girls, and call it a marriage. And then wonder why so many times it is mistreated when perhaps, marriage should not be left in the hands of people who do not control the outcomes.”
“Just as my mother would have said that most peasant girls at that age would be working instead and probably never marry until they were twenty. There are many couples who do separate, although many of them could be said that a lot of them were of convenience. And only a few were of love. But I do agree that it perhaps should not be left in the hands of those who do not have a hand in its outcome.”
“And or families who marry their children to build alliances. Even as they are dependent on whether it lasts, but rather they still have the common interest in each other.”
“Why do you have such a view? I can’t really say much about marriage merely because I do not have a married mother, and my real mother was treated as a concubine by them.”
“Well, my mother detests my father for his mistresses. They were married no older than children, she was fourteen and he had been sixteen. They were quite young, initially it went well. But they drifted apart once he was an adult, an now they barely have anything to converse in.”
“Then, do you want to see me run away?”
“I don’t know. I don’t want you to take anything, you have been surprisingly open about this. As almost no one else would, perhaps it is a fairytale they use to trick girls. Marry well and all would go their way, when it often depended on a few more variables than that.”
“I never got that fairytale, I was raised by spinster women after all. Who had a lot of surrogate children, whom they fed as well as raised. Who would work for her, and I can sell it to them should I no longer want to do so.” As much as they had more freedoms.
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