“Anything else I should know about marriages while plotting my escape?”
“Prepare to be swarmed by various female relatives.” She took up her drink. This was something which made a large amount of sense right now while they could or was possible to do so while they could have done so. “They always make the effort to appear and help out, since help is invaluable, thus it is a trade. And major events are all women really concern themselves with. There just isn’t all that much to do so right now at the very least.”
“I knew weddings have a lot, but is it really necessary?”
“For my sister, she needed them. To get into her dress, to be taught what to do, what to say, and also all the traditions and all the offerings. Those were vital, and once she crossed she was her husband’s, she was no longer with them. And thus it is a time when mothers teach their children the most about it. For marriage is the only thing we can look forward to in our lives.”
Not for her, since she never really had the chance or even the option to find them by this point at the very least. When they could have done so right now when they could have. She was right in that regard. “Although for us it rarely is, although we learn of the various rites. A concubine never has the same rites as that of a wife. And it is simpler. Although even that is a coveted position, provided it is to the right man.”
A chief wife always had more rights. And most families rarely took on concubines, only those at the top could make such an attempt or even try to do so. Or when they were serving the Emperor. Albeit most were unfeeling or cold, anything else which was possible while they were here. Since daughters were sacrificed, they were unlikely to come back. With most growing old in solitude, as they were only meant for one men.
An entire palace for them. But she did not care so much, but learned them in case she ever wanted to marry. Her mother wanted her to make a choice, advocating for nothing less than what she wanted. What she personally could. Not suggesting anything for her, which she learned was rare. Most chose one or the other while they could.
But she wanted something. An answer to a certain question. “Do you ever regret choosing this life?”
“It would be a lie to say that I did not. There are days where I have nothing but absolute regret for the situation right now. But I enjoy the freedom, the liberation it brings me just as much as otherwise. But always, if you want it that badly. Even things which brings you absolute misery is not torture for you. It is something that you can take. That is the truth here.”
And she was right. Her mother had no real regret for the situation, even as many pitied her, reviled her, hauled her through coals about her lack of morals. Even as she mostly shook them and continued to work, for she merely didn’t conform to them on one thing: she was unmarried. But other than that, she had a happy life, she was a mother, raising a child and sometimes even more than that. It would be wrong to say that she did not lead a good life.
That she did not contribute, she was far more helpful than most. Who concerned themselves with families, and instead ignored the plight of them. And she understood, that it would be unpleasant. It would be unpleasant for anyone, and some had already begun to look at her in askance. Wondering why she was still unattached, even as most were already betrothed and some married.
Her mother did not, merely letting those things be. While never taking any of their words into stride if at all. And that was how she should have chosen to do so while they could have at the very least while they were now here. When they allowed them to do much while they could have.
“But they will be there, there will be moments when you wonder what it would have been like if you chose a slightly different life when they had the chance to do so while they were here now.” In its own way, she had no mentioned it either.
“Did you?”
“No, in its own path something set me onto this path.” Just as she took it, dodging any more questions. Nothing was holding her back if at all. She did not need to worry, she was racing against any clock. But of course, a certain understanding that she had to choose. She had to pick carefully. The price of choosing the wrong choice was high.
And she could not go back. Thus, she had to make them count. If looking back and wondering was all she cared about, then she was not a person with a good life. Neither did she even make the choice to even choose this, if she only looked back. If it was her own, and she enjoyed it, then she could make herself move forward. Make it more bearable.
Wondering about the possibilities did nothing of that, while showing something really crucial, that they did not care at all. Neither did they even bother very much.
“But you don’t have the weight of having your freedom taken away, at least not immediate. It is something that will come, but you can pick and you can run.” Perhaps to another restaurant far away, making them think that she was escaping poverty or disaster. As long as she proved that she was not without child, she would be believed.
And she was now rather young, so she could be believed. And trusted to be truthful about her circumstances. And showing her eagerness would be enough, and mistakes would be tolerated as long as it was nothing major. Nothing incredibly large or huge at the very least.
“Thank you.” She had many many things to think of right now, about where she stood and what she could use with the cash. It would make sense to perhaps keep them and perhaps transfer one of them, and use some of the others for clothes. Or perhaps personal items which could be trusted. That much money on anyone was not normal.
Thus she needed to think and plan her trip. She wanted it at the end of the day, and she figured that she truly wanted it then she could start the planning all immediately. The route she would take and where she could go and what she would see. It was important now, and perhaps she should start this by buying a map first.
Once she had it in mind, she walked to find a cartographer.
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