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Thorn and Hip: The Complete Series

S2: Banishment

S2: Banishment

Sep 30, 2019

"Forsooth. Repent and you shall henceforth be sent free."

"Never. You'll pay for this!" Theo said.

A few hours earlier...

Kate and Theo had just come back from a mission when they got an alert that read something strange. It said 2D creatures invading city section 7. 

"Well Theo, crime never sleeps." Kate said. 

Both of them were transported to the scene and, truth be told, there were weird 2D things invading the city. 

"Let's do this." Theo boldly exclaimed. 

They began to fight the creatures but when they touched them their view began to distort. Their bodies felt tingly.

In the shadows, someone uttered, "Hope you like my new game...careful you could really die this time…"

Next thing they knew, Kate and Theo were in a strange new world. It looked similar to theirs but was set in the Dark Ages. Knights walked the roads, disease was easily contagious, and a giant castle loomed over them. 

"Oh c'mon not another game!" Theo groaned.

"You're under arrest!" A voice said. 

Several guards approached them. 

"What did we do?" Asked Kate. 

"All questions are for the king." Said one of the guards. 

The guards then put them in shackles and dragged them into the castle. Theo struggled to get free and one of the guards, annoyed by Theo's shenanigans, clobbered him in the head with a shield and knocked him out. After what seemed like forever, they were thrust on the floor in front of an elaborate room. 

"Why have you come into my land?" Said one of the figures that was sitting on one of two chairs that were in the center of the room. 

"They seemed to be conducting some sort of sorcery." One of the guards answered. 

The figure upon the chair came into view and said "Do you know who I am? I am the king of this kingdom. You have broken one of the laws of the land. Thou shalt not perform works of sorcery. Forsooth. Repent and you shall henceforth be sent free." 

"What? This is crazy! You'll pay for this!" Kate said. 

"Then I hold you accountable to treason for disobeying the law and henceforth banish you for all eternity. You will never return to this land and if you do you will be killed without question. Let us hope we will not meet again for this reason. Now go." Said the king.

The guards pulled them away and took them to the outskirts of the village. They unshackled them and threw them on the ground and left. 

"Ungh. Uh. W-where are we?" Theo groggily said as he woke up. 

"We got exiled for apparently doing sorcery." Kate said. 

"This is a great start to my day." Theo said.

"Psst. Over here." A voice beckoned. 

"Everything is not what it appears to be. Take these weapons and destroy them." The voice said.

"Destroy them?" Asked Theo. 

"You will soon see…" The mysterious figure said before he faded away in the shadows. 

"Well let's go back to the castle to slay some dudes I guess." Theo said. 

On their way there they encountered some guards and proceeded to fight them. Once Kate saw an opening she struck one of them and cut him in half revealing sparking cords and a bunch of mechanical parts. 

"What the heck?" Kate questioned. 

As they cut all of them down they realized they were all robots. They made their way to the castle doors and busted their way through. They mowed their way through the rest of the guards and busted down the doors to the throne room. 

"You dare come back?! Guards, seize them at once!" The king ordered.

"The tables have turned Your Majesty. Surrender or die." Theo said.

 "Alright, you have won." Said the king. 

"Wait, what?" Kate asked. 

"It was this easy?" "Well, yes...for a game. And this is only the beginning!" The king said. 

The king began to laugh but was disappearing at the same time. 

Just then everything around them started to turn into pixels. Everything medieval was gone and all that remained was an empty pixelated void.

Congratulations! You beat level one. Transporting you to level two...

zachariahinfradical
T&H Official

Creator

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Thorn and Hip: The Complete Series
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Years after the legendary heroes Slinky and Laughing Matter hung up their capes, it's up to their kids to continue the legacy. Who are these kids? Why are they special? Can I finish a hot dog in less than 5.34 seconds?! Did the chicken, in fact, cross the road?! Find out in the misadventures of Thorn and Hip!
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64 episodes

S2: Banishment

S2: Banishment

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