"Andrew! How many times do I have to scream your name till you get yous ass down here!"
I walk down the fluffy, brown stairs half-asleep while grabbing the railing so I don't fall. I join my brother at the table. Our table is dark wood with scratches all over. We used to own a cat till he ran away because Miss Clair forgets to feed him. He would constantly scratch the table till his nails were nice and sharp. My brother used to allways complain about it. Once the cat left, he felt a little guilty.
"It's about time you got up. Hurry up and get your stuff, there is no time to eat, by then school would start. Tyler, you too. I will drop you off sometime after your brother."
"Mom, where did my toothpicks go. I need them for a project."
"How the hell would I know."
I ran upstairs, back to my room, to get my bag. I take a peek at the miror to check my curly mess of hair. I don't usually care about how I look but someone made a comment about it yesterday. It's not that I'm insecure, I just don't like people talking to me so I try my best to make sure I'm unaproachable. I don't hate people. I just don't mix well with others. I run down stairs to meet Tyler at the door.
"Where is miss Clair?"
"Probably yelling at the neighbor for sleeping with her husband. Why don't they just divorce allready?"
I start to make my way to the back door untill miss Clair burst through the front so fast the ancient door allmost flew off it's hinges.
"Where were you last night?"
"Sleeping."
"Miss Johnson said she saw you sneaking out and you didn't come home till very early this morning."
"I was out."
"Just because I've been out more lately, doesn't mean you can leave whenever you want! Look at me when I'm talking to you!"
"So you have 'been out lately' more like every night! You bearly come home! Ever since I got put in this house you've been out partying with your buddies leaving me and Tyler up at night thinking if you will ever comme back alive! It's even worse during the holidays! When will you grow up Clair and be the adult you're supposed to be!"
I turn around and continue to make my way to the back door. I can't look at her right now or I might say something I will regret. Why am I stuck here?
"I'm your mother now and you look at me when I'm talking to you."
She grabs me by the shoulder and yanks me behind till I face her. I take her hand and throw it off. I start to smirk. I can't control it. Why does this allways happen? I'm gonna look like an ass hole. She gets so mad that the same hand swings back and strucks me across the face. I freeze and fall back in surprise. Miss Clair has allways been the yelling type, but never has she hit us before. I rub my cheek and clutch my fists. Without thinking, my body starts moving on it's own. My arm starts to swing its way to her face. Luckily, I was able to slow it down before it could cause much damage. But she still got a direct hit.
I collapse on my knees. My head hurts. I can hear a loud booming sound. When the noises start to stop, I hear a strange and familiar scream. It sounds like Miss Clair's. My heart is aching. Which is strange, because I'm not sad at the moment. I feel more angry than depressed. I feel as if someone is pulling on my hair. I taste blood. Miss Clair isn't very strong so how could my mouth be bleeding? Maybe she's stronger than she looks?
For a few seconds, I could of sworn I seen a man's shadow at the corner of my eye. He had such a wicked face. A face that I've seen before, but I can't remember where. I wake up from this strange trance. Tyler is hovering over me with a look of shock with a bit of disgust. I put two fingers in my mouth to find that it's not bleeding. Did I just imagine it?
I look up and see Miss Clair supporting herself against the corner of the door and wall. Blood is dripping from her mouth. Shit. I did this. I made a run for it. I grabbed my bag that I dropped when I fell and raced to the back door. Did I really just punched Clair across the room? I tried so hard to stop myself.
I ran nonstop till I reached the school. I couldn't belive what I've done. I never knew my own strenght. Shit! Shit! Shit! What was I thinking? That's exacly it. I wasn't thinking. I really need to apologize before it's too late. Why does this allways happen? If only I could control it and when I tell people I can't they allways say I'm making excuses. If only I could've stopped my face from smirking. It's like my body won't lisen to me.
Shouldn't she be apologizing to me? Wait, stop. I shouldn't be thinking that way.
I feel something wet fall down my cheek. I'm crying. Shit, why am I crying? I can't go to class like this. I start running to the bathroom. To get there I take a left and two rights. I hear a few teachers and students yell before I got there. I peek inside to make sure no one is there. Empty. I hurry to a stall and lock the door. At this point I might as well skip class. I don't want to go soaked in tears.
The taste of tears is strange. My face is drenched. I take some toilet paper to wipe away the wetness. It feels like I've been sitting here for hours but it has only been a few minutes. After a while, the tears have stopped. I didn't leave the stall till I was sure they wouldn't start again.
Once I left the stall, the memory of the man I've seen, after the incident earlier today, lingered in my mind. He was around the same height as me and has light brown hair. Who was he and why did he seem so familiar? If only I got a clear view of his face. I check the time and it's 10 minutes before my next class. I should stay a bit longer till the puffiness of my eyes dissapear.
Fuck. I did something dumb today.
Lately I've been making a lot of dumb decisions.
Why can't this just be over? Why can't life go back to how it was before miss Clair adopted me. When she was only a foster parent. The closer people get, the more it hurts. Them and myself. This is why I close myself off from others. This is why I can't let anyone near me.
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