Warning: This chapter contains mild sexual content, viewer discretion is advised.
Later that night Joan tossed and turned in her bed. She couldn't sleep not with the heaviness of the weight she had to get off her chest. She grabbed her phone and called Bex.
"Hello?" Joan said when she heard the line pick up.
It was silent for a moment.
"Bex?" Joan sat up in bed.
"Joan?" she heard Bex's confused voice.
"Yeah, you okay?"
"Where am I?" Bex asked.
"What do you mean?"
"I... I don't know."
"Bex?"
"I..."
"Bex? Hello?"
"I think... What is going on?" she could hear the panic rising in Bex's voice.
"What? Are you okay?"
"I'm... not at home. I think I slept walked out of my freaking house!"
"What!? Where are you?"
"I..."
"Bex?"
"I don't know, this is so weird. I was dreaming of another one of Lyssa's memories, and now I'm here. I think I'm close to your house."
"Where are you, I'll come to you, we have to talk anyways."
"Um... I see the school, sort of. It's kind of far away, but I see it!"
"Okay, meet me there."
"Okay, bye." Bex hung up.
Joan put her boots on and grabbed a jacket before sneaking out of her window. She didn't want to alert her mom or brother that she was out and about at this time of night.
She walked to the school and got a text from Bex to meet her in the field house by the football field. Joan shivered and looked around in the night, her breath fogging up the air in front of her. She trekked across school grounds and found the field house, sliding the door open and stepping inside.
"Hey," Bex's teeth chattered.
"Christ! Bex, what the hell?" Joan ran over to her.
"Not my fault I sleepwalk, apparently," Bex complained.
She was only in a long t-shirt and her underwear, nothing else. Joan quickly took her jacket off and gave it to Bex. Bex sighed in comfort as Joan's warmth engulfed her. Joan rubbed Bex's arm and led Bex over to a dirty old couch in the back, surrounded by volleyball and basketball carts.
They sat down and the couch creaked loudly.
"What happened, what were you dreaming?" Joan asked.
"Well it was weird, it was like Lyssa was leading this person out so that she could feed on them. Using some weird vampire power to do it. Next thing I know my phone ringing in my hand woke me up and I'm in the middle of nowhere!"
"Okay that is it, I've had enough. We are breaking this bond."
"No!"
"Yes! You two are broken up, and I hate to say it Bex, but Lyssa's days are numbered. Meaning so are yours. I won't just stand by and let you kill yourself for her!"
"You don't know anything about it! I love her."
"She broke up with you!"
"We had a slip today, and it's only a matter of time before she caves in and gets back together with me." Bex crossed her arms.
"Do you even hear yourself? I am talking about your life! Not just some stupid high school romance."
"It's none of your business so stay out of it!"
"You are so selfish!" Joan screamed at her.
"Excuse you?"
"I don't want you to die, you are my best friend. It's like you don't even care about that anymore. I already lost my dad, I can't lose you too. I can't. You will die if you continue to stay bound to her. Her pack is coming for her, and if they don't kill her, the slayers will. I can't protect you forever. I don't want you to die." Joan sobbed.
Bex's eyes watered and she just stared at Joan.
"You're selfish, you don't think about that, do you? About what you leave behind when you die. You leave me behind, you leave all of our friends, your family. We all have to deal with your loss, but you don't care about that. You don't care that it will hurt me most of all, not because I love you, but because I know in my heart I can save you, but you won't let me. I could have saved you, and if you die, that will haunt me for the rest of my life."
"Joan I'm not going to die,"
"Yes, you are! Because Lyssa is going to die. She's old Bex, really old. Her time is up, she knows it, I know it, and deep down you know it too. Do you think her pack will just let her get away with killing Lacy? Do you think the slayers give a damn that you are bonded with her because they don't! Trust me, I know. I am sick and tired of trying to be okay with all of this. If you aren't going to listen to me then we can't be friends anymore."
"What!?"
"I don't want to be close to you when you die. I have to distance myself. I have to. I can't take another loss. I'm already so broken. I nearly lost you today, again, and I can't keep going through this every time something happens to Lyssa. You don't know what it's like for me. You don't even care. You aren't looking at the big picture and what scares me most of all is you won't be ready when the time comes. You'll die wondering how it is you got to that point. Well, this is me telling you right now, stop pretending everything is okay because it isn't. Let me try and save you."
"Our bond is too strong; you'll never break it."
"Is that because you honestly believe that, or you just don't want it to break?"
"Joan... you don't know what it's like to have a bond like this. To feel what I feel for Lyssa."
"You will take those feelings with you to your grave."
"Don't worry I'm sure Rooney will provide all the comfort you need after I die," Bex said bitterly.
"This has nothing to do with her."
"Did you at least break up with her?"
"Why does that matter!?"
"She tried to kill me!"
"You are trying to kill yourself every day you stay bound to that vampire!"
"You're just jealous of Lyssa, admit it!"
"Oh my god, you are so fucking immature."
"So are you!"
"Am not!"
"Is that why you started dating Rooney? Is she my replacement so that way you won't feel so guilty when I die?"
Joan slapped Bex clean across the face.
The sound echoed off the thin walls of the field house.
Bex's eyes got wide with shock.
"Don't you ever say something stupid like that again. No one can replace you, Rebecca. You aren't going to die, not if I have anything to say about it. I will save your ungrateful ass whether you like it or not!"
Bex let a sob escape her lips and backed away from Joan.
Joan reached out for her but Bex jerked away. Joan sighed.
"Why do you even care? If I am so much trouble then why do you even bother?" Bex asked.
"Do you really have to ask?" Joan forced a laugh.
Bex slumped in her seat.
"I'm sorry I hit you," Joan said.
"No you're not,"
"True you did have it coming."
Bex turned and glared at her.
Joan smiled.
"Focusing on silly things helps me not get so freaked out about my impending doom." Bex finally admitted.
"Is this your way of finally admitting you are jealous of Rooney?" Joan teased.
"See, you are immature," Bex smirked.
"Guess so," Joan playfully elbowed her.
"I am jealous of her," Bex admitted.
"Why? You made it pretty clear that you don't-"
Bex cut her off by kissing her.
Joan's eyes got wide. When Bex pulled back she locked eyes with Joan.
"Just because I smile doesn't mean I'm happy, just because I laugh doesn't mean I thought it was funny. And just because I say I don't like you-"
Joan cut her off with another kiss.
Bex sighed into her and deepened the kiss. Joan pulled Bex on to her lap and the two quickly started a heated make-out session. Joan pulled the jacket off of Bex and let it fall onto the couch behind her. Then she gently pushed Bex down on top of the jacket.
When Joan began to kiss her way down Bex's throat Bex moaned loudly.
"Not there," Bex whispered as Joan kissed the jugular of Bex's neck.
Joan ignored her and sucked the skin into her mouth which caused Bex to moan louder.
Bex grabbed Joan's shirt and yanked on it. Joan pulled back and quickly threw her shirt off followed by her arm sling. Bex watched Joan excitedly take her pants off before getting back on top of her. Joan could see the apprehension on Bex's face, the cloud of lust had faded away and now Bex wasn't so sure anymore.
"Please tell me you didn't change your mind." Joan whimpered.
"I don't know," Bex admitted.
"What do you mean?"
"I don't know, I'm so confused."
"Look at me, look into my eyes. I love you Rebecca." Joan grabbed Bex's hand in her own.
"But I don't know if I love you," Bex locked eyes with her.
Joan pulled back.
"No, it's just... One of the reasons Lyssa broke up with me was because she knows how I feel about you." Bex sat up.
"How do you feel about me?"
"Confused," Bex admitted.
"Why?"
"Because... I just, I don't know. I'm trying to work everything out in my head. I know how you feel about me, but I don't know if I feel the same."
"We can try it," Joan said.
"What about Rooney?"
"There is no Rooney when there is a you."
"I'm scared."
"Why?"
"Because... I don't want to lose Lyssa."
"What about me? You don't know how long I've waited for you only for you to be stolen away by her. I can't keep waiting around forever, unlike Lyssa I'm not immortal."
Bex felt her stomach flip flop, she had never felt so conflicted. Joan could read her face and sighed before moving to get up, Bex grabbed her arm and then leaned in and kissed Joan again.
Joan moaned into her mouth and pushed Bex down on her back once again. Bex pulled Joan's bra off and Joan slipped Bex out of her shirt. Joan pulled back breathless, she took in Bex's bare chest and her hands trembled as she trailed them up Bex's stomach slowly.
"Bex, I want you to be my first," Joan said.
"Are you sure?"
Joan nodded and locked eyes with her.
Bex's cheeks flushed and she nodded an okay sign.
"C-Can you show me what to do?" Joan blushed.
Bex once again nodded and sat up. She kissed Joan and pushed Joan down so that she was laying on her back. Then she grabbed Joan's underwear and slid them down her legs. Joan's heart raced as she watched Bex go down between her legs.
"Just relax," Bex said.
Joan let her head fall back on the couch and her whole body jolted once she felt the first brush of pleasure on her sex. Joan let out a shaky breath and closed her eyes as more waves of pleasure consumed her.
"Oh... god..." Joan moaned softly.
Bex pulled back and Joan watched her slip off her own underwear. Then Bex got on top of her and interlocked their legs.
Bex could see the first-timers fear in Joan's eyes so she grabbed Joan's good hand and interlocked their fingers before she made love to her best friend in the field house in the middle of the night.
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