Back at work, I fix my makeup in the staff bathroom. The shrill fluorescent light reveals dark circles under my eyes and my sunken cheekbones. 

In the deepest pits of my mind, I hear my husband's screams. The creaking of metal. The splitting of bone. The dripping of blood. 

Exhaling a long breath, I try to brush aside the flashbacks. Now is not the time to wallow. I must take control of my life. 

It's now or never.