Bzzzzzz.
Steph lazily pulled her phone out of her bra. She was more interested in the show she was watching with Jer, Charles, and Roxie than anyone who might be texting her right now. It was probably a roommate, since she was already with the people who texted her the most.
Flipping open her phone, Steph saw that the text was from an unknown number.
Unknown: I'm up for a good time
Steph: I think you have the wrong number, sorry
U: Isn't this Stephanie?
Steph was startled. Who was this? Why did they have her number? And what did they mean by a good time?
S: ...yes, but idk who you are
U: I thought you wanted to hook up. Did you not post that?
Steph sat up straight. Hook up? Post what? Steph stared at her phone until it buzzed again.
U: I'm sorry. I didn't mean to bother you. Forget I said anything
Now more texts were coming in. All were similar to the first one. Steph started to panic.
S: No, it's ok. Can you please tell me where you found my number?
It took a few minutes for a response to come in. Jer looked over at Steph with a quizzical look. She was starting to shake. Her phone didn't stop buzzing for more than a few seconds at a time. Roxie and Charles looked at each other, unsure of what was going on.
U: Craigslist
Steph looked over at Jer. Her eyes misty and her voice barely above a whisper.
"Can I use your computer?"
"Of course," Jer replied. He went over to the TV stand that he used as a computer desk and quickly signed on.
Steph pulled up the "Missed Connections" page of Craigslist. She clicked open each link until she found it.
cute F looking for M or F
i'm looking for a good time! anyone will do ;) text me!
<3 stephanie
eight. zero. one. five. five. five. five. five. five. five.
see you soon ;*
Steph leaned back against the computer chair. She could barely keep her tears back. Her phone buzzed yet again. She nervously opened it.
Hey girl! I'm also looking for a good time with a girl ;)
Steph heard a gasp. Roxie was standing behind her. Charles and Jer were huddled close by. Tears streaming down her cheeks, Roxie put a hand on Steph's shoulder. Steph scanned the Craigslist page to see how she could take this post down. She found the "report a scam" button. After getting the post taken care of, Steph silently made her way back to the couch.
Pulling her knees up to her chest, Steph flipped open her phone again after yet another buzz.
Incoming picture message. Accept or decline?
Steph didn't have a chance to hit decline. Charles grabbed the phone out of her hand.
"You're not dealing with that," he muttered as he started deleting messages as they came in.
Roxie sat down next to her. Steph wasn't really in the mood to accept a hug, but she didn't say anything as Roxie pulled her in close. Steph stayed stiff, hugging her knees. No one in this room could possibly know what was going through her head. She'd only met them a few months ago.
No one knew that Steph was having flashbacks. Things she had been told by ex-boyfriends were flying through her head. Comments made by boys about her body and her supposed sexuality. Reminders of being scared walking home from campus because cars full of men would slow down behind her so they could holler crude comments out the window. Bruises on her arms from boys with a false sense of possession.
Remembering how she couldn't go on dates with people in her school district in high school because of rumors that had been spread about her. Her fear that anyone who showed interest in her only did so because they had heard the rumors.
The loneliness of no one taking her complaints of harassment seriously. Wonder if she was overreacting, because everyone said she should just take the compliments, or why would anyone ask her for sexual favors when they weren't getting any action.
And the fear she hadn't felt since she started dating Will that she would one day give in to these requests because she just didn't have the energy to refuse anyone anymore. She didn't know anyone else who started getting propositioned at the age of 10, so she didn't know anyone to prove that you could continue to refuse advances for this long. If she could make one wish right now, it would be that she didn't have 10 years of refusals under her belt. Steph was so tired.
All Roxie, Charles, and Jer saw was a stiff, scared girl, with silent tears running down her cheeks as she tried to shrink into her knees. They tried to comfort her, but they couldn't know what she needed, and she had no intention of letting them know what had happened to her in the past. They would never look at her the same again. All they would see was the whore she was. There wasn't any other explanation for why this kept happening to her. If it happened to her after moving thousands of miles away and cutting all contact with those back home (save a few proven friends), then it must be her fault.
Oh, how she wished Will was here. Will, her best friend, the man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. If he were here, she would be safe again. But he wasn't, and as much as her new friends unknowingly tried to fill that void, they just couldn't. And she didn't know how she could, because if she told him about this, he would come home. As much as she longed for him to come home, she would never forgive herself if she was the reason he didn't finish his mission in the Philippines.
---
Steph didn't know how long it had been since she had pulled into her shell when she started taking in her surroundings again. Roxie still had her in a firm hug. Thankfully, Roxie had stopped crying. Steph could not deal with someone else's tears right now. Charles was still holding Steph's phone, though the incoming texts had slowed down considerably. The person who caught Steph's attention the most, however, was Jer.
Jer had a look on his face that she had never seen there before. He looked furious! At first Steph was scared that he had realized that she was unclean and unworthy of his friendship.
Steph watched him pace his living room. His face was a shade of red she hadn't seen before. It was different than when he blushed from her teasing. His eyes were narrowed and he kept putting his clenched fist up to his lips. There was something besides anger in his eyes, though. After watching him for a while, Steph realized what that something was. It was concern. Concern for her.
Steph was shocked. No one had ever had that kind of look about her before. Sure, Will had been angry about the things that had been said about her and he was concerned about how she those things made her feel, but there was always that element of jealousy. Like he wasn't just angry that people were degrading her, but also that other guys were even thinking about her like that.
Jer didn't have any air of jealousy about him. Steph's shell began to fall away as she watched this man care about her with no thought for himself. It seemed odd that her friend's anger would be comforting to her. Yet here he was, with every excuse to look at her like an object, just like everyone else, and not a trace of objectifying her in his reaction. It somehow made her feel whole.