"Everybody loves Sarah! Dad loves Sarah because she is a sweetheart; Mom loves Sarah because she is not troublesome; Astrid loves her because Sarah hangs on every word of hers; worships her! But nobody cares about me or my interests and my friends! 'He is no good for you because he's two years your senior' or 'This girl is not a positive influence on you'. For crying out loud! Her mother is a tattoo artist, not a killer! It's strange that she didn't text Mom or Dad about my piercing."

Something metallic hits the floor.

"Snitch is all she wants! You both blame me for being a bad friend and a bad sister, but you both left me. Sarah stopped talking about magic as if on purpose, having pretended that she had no idea what is going on! She made new friends at school and forgets about me, but when they all dumped her, she finally decided to come crawling back! And she was so genuinely surprised that I had my own normal friends and normal life without magic!" she says, sobbing.

"Maybe she did forget about magic. I always forget lots of things! Sometimes, I hide nuts in knotholes of different trees or in someone's attics and forget about them."

"As you forgot about me? You promised to visit me and call me, but you never did!"

"But I did call you using Astrid's phone, and I sent you letters. I'm not good at writing, but Lev and Astrid helped me. I even drew you a picture of my oak tree where I live. I swear!" the squirrel girl says passionately. "But you never wrote me back, though Lev promised me to read your answers if there were any. Once I even came to your place. I pleaded one of the banshees to take me with them when they were heading to the big human city. I knocked at the door. A tall human opened it and said that you are busy and told me not to come again. I turned into a squirrel and climbed the ivy that grew on the wall of your house and got to your bedroom window. I looked inside, but nobody was in. I really wanted to come in and secretly wait for your return. I wanted it to be a big surprise! But I was not invited, and a human toddler noticed me and started shrilling 'Sqwivel! Sqwivel!' I was scared of him and had to hide in jasmine shrubs. Astrid and Lev were sooo angry at me for having fled to you. They thought I was lost, and I was really lost for a while, but later they found me in the park not far from your house. And now I am not allowed to go outside the village and the forest territories alone."

"But I don't understand! Who told you that I was busy? Was it Mom? Of course it was Mom! Who else! And she never told me about your visit!" I can hear Billy's hissing. "And I never received any letters from you. It could have easily gotten lost in the mail: it's so old fashioned to send real paper letters! Besides, it causes massive damage to trees," she draws the line like a real activist.

"I'm not really good at telling people apart. I'm sorry. And I will never send you any paper letters again: I had no idea that letters could be so dangerous!"

"Don't say sorry! It's not your fault! I had to be more persistent, but, instead, I was too stubborn to call you or text you myself. And now I lost you as my friend too."

"You did not lose me," giggles Nina. "I'm here, silly, sitting in front of you or a bad magician made something bad to your eyes?"

"Seriously, Nina! I messed up, but you are not angry. Why?"

"I don't understand you. You are here, and I'm here! I was told that humans can't let go of the past. But it's just past that doesn't exist anymore."

"I don't know what to tell you about that," Billy's voice is soft and surprised.

"Do you have any sweets?" asks the squirrel eagerly.

Billy laughs, "You have a great talent to switch from philosophy to real life," she speaks through her nose, for it is still stuffed because of the crying. "Tell me everything about your life when I was absent, meanwhile, I will try to find a candy for you."

I've overheard enough to burst into soundless tears. I was that bad guy all the time.

That night I spent in Astrid's bedroom. I was too ashamed to face Billy or talk to her. I was sure she was not eager to have a heartfelt and honest conversation with me: I knew I was not welcomed for good. When I was at the very edge of falling asleep, still feeling the bitter taste of tears on my lips and tongue, I heard the girls talking quietly: they were making up for lost time.

The room is filled with bright morning light, and the sky is amazingly blue. The window is wide open, and I can hear a big heavy bumblebee slowly buzzing outside. Amazingly, how the chunky guy could lift his fluffy belly. With a low 'bzzzzz' like a distant sound of a cargo plane he flies away to the garden bright flowers: white petunias and ox eye daisies that are always watching you and bowing their stems in the light wind, purple cosmos flowers and peonies, orange marigolds and Indian cresses.

Just for a second I feel fine forgetting all my troubles. But like the sudden eclipse of the sun my bright morning mood turns grey. Even airy and white Astrid's bedroom looks like the ashy surface of the moon: dead and spiritless.

The living room is different today. The long, massive dining table has disappeared. And right now, there is a big pig iron cauldron in its spot: just in the middle.

All adults are in the living room: Astrid is hovering over the boiling and hissing potion. The cauldron is puffing and fuming like an angry engine. The young woman is stirring it slowly from time to time making the silvery potion emit transparent bubbles. These bubbles, that resemble blurred rainbow drops of petrol on the grey asphalt, remind me the time when Mom, Billy, and I would go to the riverbank to feed fat, cheeky ducks and swans. Mom would usually buy us bubble makers and cotton candies. I used to be very naughty and capricious then. Once I was crying ten minutes in a row only because I thought that my cotton candy looked smaller than Billy's...

There are no butterfly fairies outside: maybe they never were.

"Aaand the last but not the least ingredient, Lev!" Astrid is stretching her hand like a cool surgeon in a popular soap opera who asks her devoted scrub nurse for a scalpel. Lev is obediently giving her that very pen.

"What are you doing?" I ask at last.

"We decided to find that weirdo!" answers Astrid joyfully. "We are going to put a ball of yarn in the potion, and it'll bring us to the man."

I look at the spitting potion in surprise having no idea how can a simple ball of yarn bring us to the man.

"Other potions happen to be too radical," says my pacifist grandma.

I can hear little footsteps. It must be Billy. This thought makes me feel ill at ease. But I am wrong. I can see Nina who is gently coming down. She's wearing Billy's spare nightie: it's a little big for her and looks like a dress. The girl resembles me grumpy and drowsy Little My with one red bun on the top of her head.

"Are you hungry?" Lev asks her. "I can give you some porridge with fruits. That's, actually, all we have for today's breakfast: we spent all night racking our brains over the books. Sometimes I think that it's really easier to call the police!"

"I'm not hungry," she grumbles.

"I can't believe," tenderly chuckles my grandma.

"That's not funny," the ginger girl grumbles again. "Have you seen Billy?"

"We have not," says Astrid with a downcast look at her bubbling potion.

"She was not in bed when I woke up. I was sure she's having her breakfast downstairs!"

"She did not come down. I have not smelt her here," Lev utters quietly.

We all silently look at each other.

"Billy!" I am the first to run upstairs. My heart is racing, and I don't know why, but I am scared to death. She could be in the bathroom or in the attic or searching for her rings and bracelets under the bed. The squirrel girl might have been so sleepy after the long night the girls spent talking to each other and didn't notice her! That's it – the explanation! That's not a big deal!

The guest room is empty, and she is not seen in the blooming garden. We rummaged through the whole house. The villa is turned upside-down at this point: the attic, the cellar, the bedrooms and the guest rooms: every nook and cranny. Lev looks at us from the garden and tosses his head. The look in young man's eyes gives me goose bumps.

"Billy! Billy! That's not funny! Bills, please, forgive me if you left because of me! Billy" I'm sure she ran away because of me and no one else. I feel emptiness inside as if a part of me has gone forever.

She is not anywhere.

"It is entirely my fault," says Astrid. I am, obviously, not the one who feels guilty today. My aunt is like a cauldron of all sorts of intense emotions. "Andrew was right! Magic world is a dangerous place, especially for young newcomers. And now she has escaped or a stranger mage kidnapped her," her hands are trembling. Lev is trying to hug her, but she puts him off. Astrid comes to the kitchen window and perches on her favorite windowsill. "He did not want me to teach her spells, and I, a stupid witch, listened to him and pulled a poor girl away from me when she needed my help. She must have been greatly confused with all her hidden powers that started to appear the moment she turned thirteen. She is a promising witch and her hidden powers are rich and strong!" Lev comes to her again and gives her a hug; she does not mind this time.

"Astrid, please don't panic. We will find her. It was not she who decided to escape; it was someone else who made her disappear, for the path of her scent is obstructed in the bedroom," says Prince Erik, patting her back.

"If he hurt her, I swear I will..." but she doesn't finish her thundering threat, for grandma comes in the kitchen.

"The potion is ready," the elderly woman has no tendency to panic and works like the well-oiled machine when the moment dictates.

Astrid jumps from the windowsill and takes out a big ball of red yarn as if out of the thin air. She swiftly strides across the kitchen and the living room towards the hushed cauldron and throws the ball into the placid silver surface of the potion.

Nina is sitting on my shoulder painfully clinging to my hair. But I don't care. We are watching Astrid's actions and waiting for the result.

I can hear some strange booming and buzzing inside. I give a start and dash back when the ball of red yarn, being possessed with magic, springs out of the cauldron like crazy and jumps up and down to the front door. It is closed, but the ball of yarn is persistently knocking it, hitting it, bumping it.

The little one definitely wants to get out of here and waits for a walk just like an excited dog.